Need advice from other Daddies.

[Guest sweetbabibunny]

Hi! Im a little and Im looking for advice form other Daddies, that might be able to help my Daddy. 

 

My Daddy is awesome and amazing and all that good stuff! And takes care of me and everyhting. I just feel that sometimes Im bothersome to him, and that I annoy him so much. He plays ps4 all day everyday and I think he has an addiction to it, because if I ask him to cuddle or for attention I normally get a sigh, or that 'look' that just says he doesnt really want to. Im not really sure how to handle this, or go about this. I've told him before that it bothers me but he just gets mad. He also has bipolar if that has any importance to this. Like just now we were looking at the forums together and reading some stuff, and when we were done I asked him if he wanted to talk about naything and he just said no, acted passive agressive, said Daddy friends would be nice, so I said how can you talk about it to someone else if you cant talk to me about it, and he went on about how we have already talked about what works for me and what doesnt, and then  he went back to playing his game. I feel that he sometimes chooses the game over me. I have told him this and how I feel and like I said, he usually gets mad at me. He is a really sweet great guy, and I know he loves me very much, but we are human and have our issues too. 

 

Any help would be much appreciated.

[Johnny Hammersticks]

Edited June 7, 2016 by SugarBear

[Guest Purple_Panda]

I'm not a daddy... but...

 

I've been there and done that...got the t-shirt, you need to show him you mean business, sit him down and tell him that his behavior is upsetting you. Gosh I went through almost exactly the same thing. 

 

Does he take medication for his bipolar?

 

I'm so sorry to see someone treat you like that... Communicate you need to communicate... Otherwise things may turn toxic, my dear, as I found out the hard way.

 

Sometimes I lose faith in men... are they all this horrible? it almost makes me afraid of them... but I know some are okay... but it doesn't help you feel uneasy around them. I apologize, I'm rambling. 

 

Well I'm guessing your daddy is quite young? he sounds like it

 

Feel free to add me and we can talk if you would like too.

 

I know how lonely it can feel...but remember you're an amazing person and don't let anyone make you feel otherwise...You're not alone, remember that.

Edited June 7, 2016 by Blue_B0mbshell

[Guest algernon]

I'm so sorry to see someone treat you like that... Communicate you need to communicate... Otherwise things may turn toxic, my dear, as I found out the hard way.

There will seldom be a time when this is not the solution, or at least part of it. There are clearly different expectations in the relationship, so each of you may look selfish or hurtful in the eyes of the other. I'm not saying you're wrong, just that in the relationship as he understands you may be - all the more reason to get on the same page, right?

 

As far as the gaming itself: introverts "recharge" with alone time; gaming provides everything from zoning out in mind-numbing electronics to immersing oneself in another world, providing a nice way to decompress or escape from stress; and video games are fun. Notice those are good things, but moderation is the key. Any or all of those things can make moderation difficult, however, especially when you throw neurotransmitter issues and actual addiction into the equation.

 

In addition to talks about the relationship, approaching him in a way that he sees you offering alone time, wanting to know what you can do to help him relax, or asking to join so you two can play together might help you get a favorable reaction. Sometimes reminding a man how sweet you are can also remind him how sweet he wants to be to you. Especially when we're too focused on beating that level to remember that anything else in the universe exists at that moment.

 

Sometimes I lose faith in men... are they all this horrible? it almost makes me afraid of them... but I know some are okay... but it doesn't help you feel uneasy around them. I apologize, I'm rambling.

You're not rambling, but you are mistaken. There are many differences between a boy and a man (age itself often being a poor indicator either way), and the ability and desire to maintain balance in all the areas of one's life is one of those polarizing factors. Just like cattiness is not a quality of a woman, but a middle-school girl. (<-- While the principle is true, the thinly-veiled commentary is insincere teasing.) Edited June 10, 2016 by algernon

[WickedJax]

Maybe there is something he's not getting out of the relationship. I only say that because I behaved in much the same way with my first little.

 

I deal with some pretty terrible depression constantly, and if there's something I'm not getting from my relationship, whether it be attention, or maybe understand of what I'm dealing with, I tend to get even more depressed, and when I get that way I recede into games. I try to drown out the pain and the aching with constant, engaging media, meaning video games. 

 

In the end all you can try to do is talk to him blatantly, openly, and caringly. Just make sure he doesn't feel like you're blaming him for something, or that you're angry.

[Guest sweetbabibunny]

Thank you all so much! We talked about it and he explained that, gaming is one his coping mechanisms for his bipolar, so when he is having a flip day, that is what he does to get himself out of it, so he can take care of me and all that good stuff! You guys are awesome! Thank you so so so soooo much!

[A&Ω]

Constant video game playing wit or without you near is a sign of a bigger.issue within him. It's a symptom. There is something that he doesn't want to face.

 

In order to right the ship you need to figure out or communicate what the larger problem is. Maybe he is not into the relationship, not just ddlg. Maybe he is depressed about work, money, family and that is how he is dealing with it.

 

Don't take it personal if there is nothing wrong between you both. This can be a great bonding moment for you to learn more about him or yourself.