Frustrated

[DapperDaddyDom]

So i am relatively new to DDLG community but my little/ girlfriend has had daddy's before and I told her not to talk to them, because they don't respect our relationship. She doesn't talk to all but One.. Her first Daddy, and it drives me crazy I've told her to stop. She texted him and told him she couldn't talk to him anymore, and blocked him on snapchat. They're still friends on Facebook, and he just made an Instagram and she started to follow him.

Some backstory

My girlfriend went to the dmv onetime and she let me use her Mac while I was waiting at my house and her messages is synced up so I could read her messages ( only started to because I saw my message pop up) then k noticed her first Daddy's name and I looked through it. He asked her for nudes, and she said " see the thing is I'm kinda seeing someone but it's not official yet" even after the fact we had been dating for a month. It pissed me off so much. I confronted her about it and she said he gets really scary when he is mad. (He lives a few states away but still has our home state phone number) I told her to not ever talk to him again and she said ok, I told her to appeal to me, but then I found out about the Instagram thing... I don't understand why she isn't listening to what I tell her, now I'm afraid that if I keep bringing up this guy and confronting her she's going to be more tempted to talk to him. I just don't know what to do. But I love her so much and she's the world to me, I want to be with her for the rest of my life.. Some suggestions would be nice. Thanks!

[Guest LavanderRabbit]

Talk to her about this. Communication is important and if he is soliciting her for naughty pictures you may need to confront him. It's not fair to you and she should be respecting your wishes, especially is he is trying to be sexual towards her.

[DapperDaddyDom]

They stopped talking over messages and snapchat when I originally confronted her about it. I get anxious really easily around this subject, so I'm always concerned whether or not she talks to him still through some other platform like IG or tumblr or Facebook etc. Originally when I saw this kind of thing I was super fucking mad and hurt. Now I'm just confused and hurt. Do you think these are good questions to ask her:

Why do you still follow him on social media?

Help me understand what draws you towards him?

Why after all the times I've told you to not contact him and you still do?

How does he feel about you?

Also, I saw on her tumblr a few days ago that some girl was like

"Hey are you still taken? Ben wanted to know?" And she said

"I would love to give him a shot, but I'm definitely taken"

And then the next day they were snapchating each other.

It's like I want to not ever worry about this again and not ever have to ask to see her messages or look at her phone when she's in the next room but things like that fuck me up and k feel like I keep having to, and I don't want that to lead to pushing her away

[Guest LavanderRabbit]

They stopped talking over messages and snapchat when I originally confronted her about it. I get anxious really easily around this subject, so I'm always concerned whether or not she talks to him still through some other platform like IG or tumblr or Facebook etc. Originally when I saw this kind of thing I was super fucking mad and hurt. Now I'm just confused and hurt. Do you think these are good questions to ask her:

Why do you still follow him on social media?

Help me understand what draws you towards him?

Why after all the times I've told you to not contact him and you still do?

How does he feel about you?

Also, I saw on her tumblr a few days ago that some girl was like

"Hey are you still taken? Ben wanted to know?" And she said

"I would love to give him a shot, but I'm definitely taken"

And then the next day they were snapchating each other.

It's like I want to not ever worry about this again and not ever have to ask to see her messages or look at her phone when she's in the next room but things like that fuck me up and k feel like I keep having to, and I don't want that to lead to pushing her away

Have you tried talking to him directly instead of her? If my boyfriend was talking to an ex and he was trying to tell them to go away I would be more than willing to fight them to leave him alone.

[littlexkittenx]

It seems to me that she may still have feelings for her old daddy. You need to ask her point blank if she has feelings for him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a little that doesn't respect the things you ask her to do.

[Meggles]

It seems to me that she may still have feelings for her old daddy. You need to ask her point blank if she has feelings for him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a little that doesn't respect the things you ask her to do.

THIS ^ Littles should respect their daddies. NO matter WHAT

[WickedJax]

I agree with littlexkittenx and Meggles. 

 

I would suggest buckling down as a Dom. Create stricter rules and enforce them more harshly. Make sure she understands where the power is, and that she is giving it to YOU because she loves you. Make it so that she's getting everything she needs as a little from you and only you, teach her to respect your word as law.

[littlelili]

It seems to me that she may still have feelings for her old daddy. You need to ask her point blank if she has feelings for him. You don't need to be in a relationship with a little that doesn't respect the things you ask her to do.

This is soooo true. If you're her daddy she should respect you and do as you say. At first when I read your post explaining, I thought that you just use your daddy voice. Ask her the questions, and if she respects you she should answer sincerely like a good little girl!!

But little kitten is correct, things should be reciprocal. Talk to her about your concerns, in a sincere way, you are daddy, and she should listen.

Hope everything goes well!

Hugs