Children

[Sarah889]

With DD/LG I don't see the place for children...
I can imagine that if an LG and her DD had a child, that they would lose that DD/LG bond, or at least up to some degree.
Would she still be his LG? Or would they both mature, see his LG as the mother and responsible adult of his child.
And in front of the child, (most of the time) they couldn't have or show their DD/LG relationship, and would have to hide it, or even move on from it. I think having a child would mature the LG, and essentially end a DD/LG type of relationship and convert it to a regular or hidden part-time DD/LG relationship. Not to mention DD would actually be a Dad, a real dad to his child...I think it would change things.

Is there anyone here who has children and is in a DD/LG relationship? If so, how do you find it?

Or, do you think there is a place for children in this type of relationship? Would you or do you plan to give up and move on from this DD/LG relationship in order to have children...

Or are children simply not on your to-do list in life?

 

[Guest BugBug]

 

This has been raised a fair few times in the last so I'm sorry If this offends anyone but this has to be said. There is a lot of discussion about whether children have any place within the DDLG lifestyle and I am astounded by the level of ignorance and lack of maturity around reproduction I read.

There are plenty of people in here, others sites and in the real world with children who are littles and daddies.

 

So to answer and dispel some myths here,this is my take. I discovered my little side around age 16. I had my child age 22 and have been in the BDSM and DDLG lifestyle regardless of being a a real parent myself. So we are talking about 11yrs in the lifestyle now and I am really secure and happy with both my little side and my mum side.

 

Just because you have children does not mean you have to give up on being you. If anything having children makes you a better little and a better daddy (I've dated both daddies who are real life parents and none and I'm sorry but the daddies with some experience of children win hands down!). I have had long term relationships with people with other children too and if you want to make it work it will work.

 

I find anyone who simply says children are not on a 'to do list' incredibly ignorant and quite frankly too immature to comprehend that children are not a hamster you buy at the pet shop, they are not an opt in option these are small human beings who are not ever to be put on a list like your weekly shop.

Quite honestly if the people who kept asking if it's right that parents are right to continue in the DDLG lifestyle had some more life experience themselves they wouldn't be asking such ignorant questions.

 

So here's a question, to the many people who have commented on previous similar threads on whether parents should be in the DDLG dynamic or just give up....where do you want us to go exactly? Shall there just be a pile of littles and daddies who actually have pretty decent knowledge about the child like mentality and needs of littles in a corner somewhere. But dammit it we reproduced so guess that's it life over because that's very much the way this is written.

 

My advice is if having children threatens your ability to be little then you are not mature enough to have kids or be in the lifestyle.

For me being little is what I am and I have a perfect little friend, hes called my son and when I was with my ex daddy we made it work our reason for breaking up was nothing to do with my son.

[Guest Shadow's Princess]

With DD/LG I don't see the place for children...

I can imagine that if an LG and her DD had a child, that they would lose that DD/LG bond, or at least up to some degree.

Would she still be his LG? Or would they both mature, see his LG as the mother and responsible adult of his child.

And in front of the child, (most of the time) they couldn't have or show their DD/LG relationship, and would have to hide it, or even move on from it. I think having a child would mature the LG, and essentially end a DD/LG type of relationship and convert it to a regular or hidden part-time DD/LG relationship. Not to mention DD would actually be a Dad, a real dad to his child...I think it would change things.

 

Is there anyone here who has children and is in a DD/LG relationship? If so, how do you find it?

 

Or, do you think there is a place for children in this type of relationship? Would you or do you plan to give up and move on from this DD/LG relationship in order to have children...

 

Or are children simply not on your to-do list in life?

 

 

I personally didn't want children with my partner at first, but he admit that he wanted to have children with me someday and I told him my concerns about having a daughter. He assured me that he would always see me as his princess and that having his kids would mean I've become something greater than just a princess, and that is his queen.

I think you would have to hide it somewhat from your children, just the names and the objects of DDlg/cgl. The reason why I know this is because my parents are a traditionally married couple and I swear she acts like a little and he acts like a caregiver. It's really adorable. ^w^

I also think it depends on what kind of little you are. Baby littles would have to hide the diapers and stuff from their kids, but other littles like me who's "play age" is 6 to 10 wouldn't have to change much.

 

Anywho, I hope that helped.

[Guest LavanderRabbit]

https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/8782-littles-having-children-or-child-free/

[Guest buddhagirl]

Seriously? So tired of this topic. I have commented at LEAST 10 times on this same question before. It would be really great if people read some and searched some of the topics before posting. I am a patient person, but I'm tired of explaining the same thing over and over. Yes, you can have children and be in a DDlg relationship. Maybe I should just move on from this forum. I feel like it's for people under 24 these days. 

[LoralieHaze]

This has been raised a fair few times in the past so I'm sorry If this offends anyone but this has to be said. There is a lot of discussion about whether children have any place within the DDLG lifestyle and I am astounded by the level of ignorance and lack of maturity around reproduction I read.

There are plenty of people in here, others sites and in the real world with children who are littles and daddies.

 

 

Exactly. I don't have children but I still get frustrated when I see ignorant judgments like this being masquerading as questions. Just because one Little either can't handle or doesn't want kids, that does NOT make it a universal truth.

[Guest LavanderRabbit]

Seriously? So tired of this topic. I have commented at LEAST 10 times on this same question before. It would be really great if people read some and searched some of the topics before posting. I am a patient person, but I'm tired of explaining the same thing over and over. Yes, you can have children and be in a DDlg relationship. Maybe I should just move on from this forum. I feel like it's for people under 24 these days.

 

If you haven't noticed the majority of people on here are littles that are 18-20

[Guest hissubmissiveprincess]

I'm in my early 30's and have 5 kids plus 1 on the way next year. My daddy and I just started DDlg about 8 months ago, but us having kids has not affected DDlg for us in any shape way or form. I agree with the other poster's saying stop posting blanket statements. Everyone's relationships are different!

[NottsDaddy]

If you haven't noticed the majority of people on here are littles that are 18-20

Well I think thats the problem; people with little to no life experience or knowledge making assumptions about people older than them

[littlelili]

This has been raised a fair few times in the last so I'm sorry If this offends anyone but this has to be said. There is a lot of discussion about whether children have any place within the DDLG lifestyle and I am astounded by the level of ignorance and lack of maturity around reproduction I read.

There are plenty of people in here, others sites and in the real world with children who are littles and daddies.

 

So to answer and dispel some myths here,this is my take. I discovered my little side around age 16. I had my child age 22 and have been in the BDSM and DDLG lifestyle regardless of being a a real parent myself. So we are talking about 11yrs in the lifestyle now and I am really secure and happy with both my little side and my mum side.

 

Just because you have children does not mean you have to give up on being you. If anything having children makes you a better little and a better daddy (I've dated both daddies who are real life parents and none and I'm sorry but the daddies with some experience of children win hands down!). I have had long term relationships with people with other children too and if you want to make it work it will work.

 

I find anyone who simply says children are not on a 'to do list' incredibly ignorant and quite frankly too immature to comprehend that children are not a hamster you buy at the pet shop, they are not an opt in option these are small human beings who are not ever to be put on a list like your weekly shop.

Quite honestly if the people who kept asking if it's right that parents are right to continue in the DDLG lifestyle had some more life experience themselves they wouldn't be asking such ignorant questions.

 

So here's a question, to the many people who have commented on previous similar threads on whether parents should be in the DDLG dynamic or just give up....where do you want us to go exactly? Shall there just be a pile of littles and daddies who actually have pretty decent knowledge about the child like mentality and needs of littles in a corner somewhere. But dammit it we reproduced so guess that's it life over because that's very much the way this is written.

 

My advice is if having children threatens your ability to be little then you are not mature enough to have kids or be in the lifestyle.

For me being little is what I am and I have a perfect little friend, hes called my son and when I was with my ex daddy we made it work our reason for breaking up was nothing to do with my son.

 

thank youuuu! this post answer should be pinned to see if ppl stop going back to this again and again.

http://66.media.tumblr.com/3015a66074714d6296159179f1c53d44/tumblr_inline_nbwoy4Lrzw1ri8ytl.gif

 

Seriously? So tired of this topic. I have commented at LEAST 10 times on this same question before. It would be really great if people read some and searched some of the topics before posting. I am a patient person, but I'm tired of explaining the same thing over and over. Yes, you can have children and be in a DDlg relationship. Maybe I should just move on from this forum. I feel like it's for people under 24 these days. 

 

I feel the same, it's so annoying sometimes!

[Guest BugBug]

Well I'm glad others agree...I was starting to feel like ive reached some sell by date age 27 eeek.

I love this forum but I dont love the level of people that think being little is free pass to just be cute and needy or something that after a certain age or children you should give up on. Theres some awesome people on here over 25 who could pass on alot of advice but are currently being sushed or judged with blanket statements.

I mean really is it bizarre to think being an actual parent might give you some inside knoweldge on littles and their needs?

[Guest buddhagirl]

Well I'm glad others agree...I was starting to feel like ive reached some sell by date age 27 eeek.

I love this forum but I dont love the level of people that think being little is free pass to just be cute and needy or something that after a certain age or children you should give up on. Theres some awesome people on here over 25 who could pass on alot of advice but are currently being sushed or judged with blanket statements.

I mean really is it bizarre to think being an actual parent might give you some inside knoweldge on littles and their needs?

You made my day! Thank you!  

[creepycutie805]

I'm still single and childless, but I really don't think children would have any negative effect. Caregiver/little doesn't affect our performance at the workplace or doing our other necessary everyday things, it most definitely won't affect parenting. If anything, I imagine bonding and playing with your kids would keep your little side happy. For the first few years you have someone to play dolls, race cars, and coloring books with.

Edited June 8, 2016 by creepycutie805

[WickedJax]

I honestly think anyone who thinks children would affect the dynamic aren't yet very knowledgeable of DDlg, as the fact of the matter is there is no difference between DDlg and vanilla relationships beyond how we express our love, and that despite the terms used, that love is in no way reflective of a parent/child relationship.

 

I know this is a bit off topic, but I even once saw a little saying they liked DDlg but would never have children with their Doms because, well, I'm sure you get the idea. Point is people like that aren't as deep and knowledgeable about this life style as they pretend to be.

[Guest LavanderRabbit]

The choice to have children or not shouldn't be based on the dynamic. I have different reasons why I don't want kids and I'm sure it applies to a lot of people. Everyone has their own reasons and it doesn't have to do anything with the kind of relationship they have.

[Nymph]

I think a lot of people confuse being little with a fetish (incest, pedophilia, etc.) while it's actually a lifestyle (playful personality with cute preferences and appreciation of being pampered)

 

In my opinion, I see it too often that some people use the little label to be selfish and immature... you can't be a proper parent if you are selfish and immature, you can't be in a healthy relationship either for that matter.

 

This does not mean I am looking down on younger people, but I think young littles, specially 18 years old or younger can't be really classified as such since they are technically still children! I get it that they are at a stage of their life where they might still be playful and are experimenting... but then the caregiver complains their "little" happened to "grow out of it" when that person was not ever a little to start with.

 

For the record I have a child and I married my Daddy... Daddy is one year younger than myself and the most mature responsible and caring man I have ever met. 

[cheshirekitten]

As a single mom and little. You will always be you.

 

Ive loved anime since i was 10. im 27 now, my daughter is 3. I still watch anime. cause thats something i love. heck my daughter watches Sailor Moon Crystal with me.

 

Ive been in the general BDSM lifestyle since i was 16. Im still a submissive. 

 

There is a huge stigma of how a child makes a person lose everything.

 

The only thing that has changed about me after a child is i have learned to laugh more and play more. 

 

Honestly its not actually a public question on "Do kids fit with this lifestyle" you should ask. I think its more of every little and daddy need to ask themselves, "do i want children in MY life?"

Edited June 11, 2016 by cheshirekitten

[Guest BugBug]

To be honest I just find it astounding people without children feel the need to put down and ask judgemental questions to members who actually have kids especially if they then say 'im not planning on having kids myself'. Whats the point seems like a cheap shot at asserting ones authority.

If you dont have kids and dont plan to for whatever reason thats great but why keep commenting on a thread about kids. Oddness.

[A&Ω]

Seriously? So tired of this topic. I have commented at LEAST 10 times on this same question before. It would be really great if people read some and searched some of the topics before posting. I am a patient person, but I'm tired of explaining the same thing over and over. Yes, you can have children and be in a DDlg relationship. Maybe I should just move on from this forum. I feel like it's for people under 24 these days.

I agree. I lurk because of a few people but overall I'm pretty disconnected from the mentality of our younger audience. I try not to judge as they too are finding their way but they also haven't lived life enough to know themselves truly. So they search for definition externally.

[Guest algernon]

I agree. I lurk because of a few people but overall I'm pretty disconnected from the mentality of our younger audience. I try not to judge as they too are finding their way but they also haven't lived life enough to know themselves truly. So they search for definition externally.

This is one of the more important things that has been said on this forum (and very efficiently put, too). It should be considered by everyone and in every context. This is one of those true pearls of wisdom I try to share with others whenever I can while striving to live it more fully myself.

[Josh's little girl]

I'm a little with two children one is 7 and the other one is 5. We color, play Barbie's, and play hide n seek, and other things. So there isn't any thing difficult about being both at the same. Edited July 15, 2016 by Josh's little girl

[Guest NeedToServe]

Oh good lord, what absolute nonsense. I don't even know how to respond!

I have three kids, so that must mean I can NOT have a daddy, nor can I be in this kind of relationship. Crap, if only you had told me sooner!

Sorry, but youth and inexperience of this kind of dynamic is no excuse for ignorance and prejudiced statements.

[Guest BugBug]

Serving Him is spot on. What im most shocked at is that the people spouting this rubbish want a daddy usually. Where did they think the term came from? God forbid a real life parent might know a thing or two about looking after others and how to manage littles and protect them. Or that a real life mum might be a great little because we understand the dynamic on a another level.