What Makes You Happy When You're Down?

[Harleykins]

So my self esteem has been pretty worse for wear recently and I don't know what I can do. My daddy tells me I'm perfect adn beautiful every day but it doesn't seem to help much any more. I hate to think I've become used to his compliments because his word carries so much weight, just his compliments don't do much.

 

I just would like to know what makes you feel better when you feel like this? What do you do either on your own or with your caregiver? Any advice would be appreciated.

[Guest ♥️ ashcake ♥️]

I don't have a caregiver, but when I'm feeling down about my appearance I tend to doll myself up... play with my hair by curling it and putting on a full set of makeup (usually I wear little to none on a daily basis). Then I will usually take pictures or just prance around my house / apartment depending on where I am for fun. For what its worth, I think you're very pretty... just remember we are often our own worst critics. 

 

other things that cheer me up (usually for little space):

 

- watching my favorite movies

- cuddling with lots of blankets / stuffies 

- going out and exploring new places (restaurants, stores, etc.)

- exercising (going on a run...)

- just venting to a friend 

[Guest StainedBlack]

You have to focus on what makes you happy. Find out what is being your down and set a goal to fix it. Work towards it every day.

Also, fake it til you make it. It works. If everyday you say "Eff yeah I'm super fine" in a sassy way and laugh about it. Eventually your attitude will change.

[Lilllybet]

I'm not with anyone at the moment, but it always helps me to have a long cuddle, normally with my blanket, while watching a  Disney movie or something that I reeeeeeally enjoy! I hope you start feeling better soon

[Guest little domi]

I mostly listen to music... Singing and dancing make me feel better about mostly anything.

[Mr. Grinch]

The song Seven Nation Army!

[Witchling]

I have severe Bi-Polar II, so I have lots of times where I get really sad for no reason.

 

When I'm down, my Daddy rolls me into a blanket burrito and puts on one of my favorite movies. Yesterday it was Winnie the Pooh. That "Up, Down, Touch the Ground" jingle always makes me smile. Once I'm comfy he cuddles me and makes sure I stay hydrated and fed because I forget to eat when I get depressive. Sometimes he will go get me a burrito from Chipotle (my favorite) and say "I got a burrito for my little burrito" it's super cute and makes me giggle.

 

When my Daddy isn't around to take care of me I will just lay there and listen to happy music a lot of the time, maybe take a nap (sometimes I wake up feeling better.)

 

As for the negative self image issue you mentioned, I agree with @ashcake about taking the time to doll yourself up and take selfies (I do this often), as well as @StainedBlack about faking it until you make it. I also find that sometimes if I feel negative about myself it helps to take a while and do some self-esteem building exercises. They feel silly to do, but sometimes that even adds to how much better it can make you feel. I'll list some examples here:

 

SELF ESTEEM/HAPPINESS BUILDING EXERCISES:

 

1. Make a self-esteem scrapbook - Try to collect as many selfies, family photos, images of trips you've taken, art you've made, tickets to shows you've been to, etc. and make a scrapbook or wall collage, or even a power-point or video set to a happy song with all these things. Add in little reminders of what make you who you are, what make you valuable. Write under your selfies why you felt pretty that day, write under the photos of the trip you took about what made you want to stop and take that photo. I know it seems a little narcissistic to make a book or video about yourself, but it really can do wonders for your self esteem if you take that time to remind yourself how important you are. 

 

2. Try power posing - Stand or sit in one of these poses with a giant smile on your face for a good minute. Seriously, try it. It feels silly, and you will laugh at yourself the first several times you try it, but it really does help. If you find this too strange, you can also try self-esteem building yoga. Exercise and power posing all rolled into one.

 

3. Find an independent hobby - This sounds a little strange, I know. But the most important thing you can do for your self-esteem is to work really hard to build it on your own. Relying on other people's image of you, while appealing and easy, is extremely damaging to your internal self worth. You start to find yourself relying on getting innumerable compliments from family and friends that are never satisfying because you start to take them for granted after a while, whether you intend to or not. Finding a hobby that you can do alone, something where you can set goals to reach without help from someone can do amazing things for your personal self worth and, in turn, your self image. It doesn't have to be something big or expensive or difficult. It can be as cheap and easy as starting a daily self-esteem journal (each day, write down three things that you did well or liked about yourself), or collecting cute rocks and giving them names. Anything. Essentially, you're fixing the internal to help aid the external. 

 

4. Replace your inner mantras - We all have these. Little voices that nag at you: "I'm a loser." "Why am I so ugly?" "I don't deserve ________." If you want to build self worth you can't keep these annoying little ideas bouncing around in your noggin. Try changing them for the positive. When you hear yourself thinking: "Man, I'm such a loser." try turning it on it's head by immediately replacing that thought with something better, like: "No. I'm awesome. Just today, I got up on time and remembered to eat breakfast (Or insert other personal achievement here)! Don't tell me I'm a loser, brain!" I find it helps to say it out loud to reaffirm it in my mind. Plus my Daddy thinks it's cute. It takes patience, but as time goes on you'll find your inner monologue changing for the better. 

 

 

Hope this helps! If you'd like more I can compile an even bigger list, I've got endless self-help advice. Also, anyone can add and message me if they need someone to talk to.   

Edited May 16, 2016 by Witchling

[Harleykins]

Thank you everyone and I'll take everything into concideration and see what works best! ^^