Sad Times :c

[LittleMissyMinx]

Today I found out one of the worst things i think ive ever done. It wasn't intentional, but its put a lot into perspective. People lie, they steal, they cheat. Theres always a reason behind it, and today i realised i am the one causing my own pain. My Daddy admitted he didn't feel like i loved him before, he then went to a horrible girl who used him and ended up in me being cheated on. I had been punishing just him this entire time when it was my fault too. I love my Daddy very much, probably more than Life itself, and i know 'it takes two to tango' but this is one of those rare situations that you should forgive and forget. Its hard, infact its still hard a few months on but I'm a little for darn tootin sake, ladybugs and polystyrene scare me let alone genitalia however delightful it may be.

 

​Forgiving isn't for all littles or Daddies but i cant enphasise how much you need to do what makes you happy. My family have practically abandoned me for my choices, they find it creepy and concerning about the fact i have a 'Daddy'. They make fun of me for it and why should i let them affect me with a life style choice that doesn't concern them? i love my Daddy and he loves

me. No one else should matter. I may have panic attacks and worry my butt off every night but my Daddy isn't stupid. Even Han Solo knows women find out everything eventually. I see so much potential for us in the future despite my doubts now, hes the only man whos ever loved me and made me feel like i deserve to be alive. He makes me the best possible version of me, and if you can find someone who makes you laugh, twirls you around and gives you silly kissies in public, and still wants to cuddle you at the end of the day, you better fight for it because theres not a lot of good people out there in this day and age.

 

​I was not the little my Daddy deserved back then, i was a silly little girl undeserving of what she had. I could have 2 days left with Daddy, or i could have 20 years left with him. But i don't care I'm going to be the best Damn little hes ever going to have during the time we may have left. He will never have to feel like i dont love him ever again.

 

​Our 2 year Anniversary is coming up (May 12th) and i am going to make sure we have the most wonderful time. He deserves it.

 

​    Minx    

 

[DaddySkellington]

Your man cheated on you and you think its your fault? It is called a co-dependant relationship and is very unhealthy. Once a cheater always a cheater. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news to you but you are doing yourself more harm than good by staying with him. I council hundreds of people every year , couples too so this isnt just a random observation, its from years of studing and researching and my degrees in psychology. It would be a greater service to your soul to move on and find a quality man that wont cheat when he feels unloved and a strong, good morals and values type of man would have talked to you about it, instead of cheating. He doesnt deserve you and you deserve better 

[Chak051]

I've never cheated myself but I agree that some situations are not as black and white as cheating is bad.

When your young and only been in a couple relationships you don't know what your doing how to act or even how to express whats wrong It often takes time apart and with different people to actually realize what was bothering you what you liked and disliked and heck I've seen this happen in tons of relationships from young people to old.

skellington you are right that alot of times cheating becomes a habit and they often don't love there partners as much as they deserve but that's not always the case.

relationships cannot be defined in definites they are a fluid constantly evolving thing they take effort even when people mess up which both parties often will and often do.

I really hope it works out between you and your daddy and I wish you the best of luck and happy early anniversary.

I do have a question though isn't a ddlg relationship really codependent in the first place, I thought that was part of the good things about it or does co-dependence have a different meaning in psychology terms?

[Guest LaidBackDaddy]

Men often try and blame the women for their violation of trust. It is very very common for men to try and make the woman feel like she is to blame because he went and made a bad choice. 

 

We are all responsible for our own actions. 

[Guest buddhagirl]

No. Just no. You were not the cause of his cheating. He is being a typical cheater and making it seem like your fault so that he doesn't have to take responsibility for his actions. You may have been awful, I don't know, but nothing you do will make someone else cheat, or lie, or steal or anything else. You can forgive him, but if you do it under the pretense that it was partially or completely your fault in the first place, it will happen again. He will believe that if he cheats he can say it was because you didn't do X or you DID do X and it made him feel sad/made/scared/unloved or whatever bullshit he chooses at the time to excuse his actions.

 

I was married to someone that didn't cheat, but treated me very badly and he was very good at explaining why it was my fault, my inconsideration, my lack of support, my disloyalty, etc., that caused his anger/rage/mistreatment. And it was complete and utter bullshit. It was him. My Daddy/husband now would NEVER mistreat me and I am the same person.

 

I hope I don't sound too harsh. I don't like people getting hurt, and I wish someone had told me what to look for and watch out for. I remember being your age and I know I was exactly where you are now--it's understandable. But if you listen to my words that come from experience, maybe you can avoid a little of the pain that's headed your way. 

[LittleMissyMinx]

Your man cheated on you and you think its your fault? It is called a co-dependant relationship and is very unhealthy. Once a cheater always a cheater. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news to you but you are doing yourself more harm than good by staying with him. I council hundreds of people every year , couples too so this isnt just a random observation, its from years of studing and researching and my degrees in psychology. It would be a greater service to your soul to move on and find a quality man that wont cheat when he feels unloved and a strong, good morals and values type of man would have talked to you about it, instead of cheating. He doesnt deserve you and you deserve better 

 

Daddy Skellington, (love the name btw) no I don't think its entirely my fault, My daddy has taken full responsibility for his actions but I am the one choosing to admit that I did infact make him feel unloved. I was a menace back then, I was on a bad pill at the time and it had caused me to do a lot of stupid things. These aren't excuses, these are facts and I'm so grateful you have helped so many people but you cant expect me to a listen to words on a screen saying I have an unhealthy relationship. Not to be with him would be unhealthy, and stating all cheaters are the same is wrong. I thank you for your advise but you don't know him or me. You are basing my relationship off a cocktail and late night blogging. He may not deserve me as of yet, but hes working on it (: I thank you for your advise once more but I am happy and I hope you are too :3

 

I've never cheated myself but I agree that some situations are not as black and white as cheating is bad.

When your young and only been in a couple relationships you don't know what your doing how to act or even how to express whats wrong It often takes time apart and with different people to actually realize what was bothering you what you liked and disliked and heck I've seen this happen in tons of relationships from young people to old.

skellington you are right that alot of times cheating becomes a habit and they often don't love there partners as much as they deserve but that's not always the case.

relationships cannot be defined in definites they are a fluid constantly evolving thing they take effort even when people mess up which both parties often will and often do.

I really hope it works out between you and your daddy and I wish you the best of luck and happy early anniversary.

I do have a question though isn't a ddlg relationship really codependent in the first place, I thought that was part of the good things about it or does co-dependence have a different meaning in psychology terms?

 

Chak051, thank you for such an optimistic outlook! Hahaha thank you, I'm very excited for it ;3 I think 1) it depends on the people and 2) in my situation, yes it does. Well throughout time that is? I am learning to depend on him again through these weeks and months of trust building and I can see myself 'falling in love' with him again. However if (touchwood) the situation were to happen again (which it wont) I know I would of one everything in my power to keep him with me. Everyone I know is supporting my choice, even strong female friends I look up to as mothers agree with me and in my opinion their word is law. But nothing has to be categorized, if two people want to be together they will be no matter what and for now my Daddy makes me feel like a wonderful princess and personally I don't want anyone else! thank you so much again for your comment :3

 

Men often try and blame the women for their violation of trust. It is very very common for men to try and make the woman feel like she is to blame because he went and made a bad choice. 

 

We are all responsible for our own actions. 

 

He has not blamed me in the slightest! He has been the one trying to encourage me to hate him, even leave him but I cant. I love him, and he loves me. He has been doing more than enough to make it up to me, and he is continuing to do so. He may be Daddy but I am in control currently. It was his choice to make yes, but he ended up staying with me, the better woman (: thank you for your comment (:

 

Edited April 22, 2016 by LittleMissyMinx