Is there a reason to add a collar to a submissive/lg?

[BDLovecraft]

My Daddy and I are long distance and today I asked him if he'd ever want to go to the dungeon I'm a member at. To my surprise, he said yes and then said that he would have to get me a collar and leash. My response to that was a big, fat "NO."

He then said he would talk to me tomorrow..I'm almost 100% positive he's doing this to punish/continue breaking me. Lol hes constantly showing me who is in charge because I'm constantly challenging him.

I'm concerned about why he would want to collar and leash me though. He and I aren't even in to that stuff in public.

Why would he want to collar me? Any advice from daddies would be so helpful.

[StarEyed]

He probably just wants to show other people that you're taken. There are other ways to "collar" submissives though. Chain necklaces with a lock (fake or real), a nice necklace/anklet/bracelet that means something to the two of you but also denotes that you're taken or even slave bells. Being collared doesn't necessarily mean that you're into pet play. When you do talk to him though try to also be understanding. Ask what the collar means to him and try to be open minded and respectful about it. Just as much as submission is trust and an honor to give, a collar is just as much as an honor to receive. It isn't for everyone but the symbolism is what is important. I don't think this is a form of punishment though. And to be honest your saying that he is trying to "break you" as in cause you to submit to him kind of brings up red flags... like I said earlier... submission is an honor and something you have to willingly give.

[Guest Ugh whatever]

For many submissives, a collar is equivalent to a commitment as serious as marriage. So there's, that. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Edited April 19, 2016 by Guest

[BDLovecraft]

Thank you ALL. This has been very helpful. StarEyed, you were partially right. It was to send a message. To be clear though, I didn't believe the collar was to punish me, more so the "I'll talk to you tomorrow" part. I should be honored, considering what it means to HIM. It's not the same thing for me and it was probably a little hurtful to him when I responded negatively. I feel horrible now knowing what it means to him. I was just frustrated because I thought words were enough to communicate to the other dungeon members who I am with. Needless to say, I apologized to my Daddy.

However, I do agree with the red flag part..I'm kind of keeping a close eye out since it's only been about two weeks since we even started talking..

[Guest NewYorkDaddy]

Symbol of commitment and a power exchange.

[StarEyed]

Thank you ALL. This has been very helpful. StarEyed, you were partially right. It was to send a message. To be clear though, I didn't believe the collar was to punish me, more so the "I'll talk to you tomorrow" part. I should be honored, considering what it means to HIM. It's not the same thing for me and it was probably a little hurtful to him when I responded negatively. I feel horrible now knowing what it means to him. I was just frustrated because I thought words were enough to communicate to the other dungeon members who I am with. Needless to say, I apologized to my Daddy.

However, I do agree with the red flag part..I'm kind of keeping a close eye out since it's only been about two weeks since we even started talking..

Yeah I would definitely tread carefully. Obviously do your best to trust him but also look at his actions, whether they be to you or to someone else. And actively ask yourself questions about his character. Is he overly demanding? Is he rude to people that give him service such as a cashier or waiter? Is he impatient or not understanding? I completely understand that he wants to assert dominance and that if the sub or little is bratty one might feel the need to assert more dominance but to right out take it isn't okay. Hopefully you'll find a good common ground. Both of you need to keep your communication strong. Say what you do and don't like about what is happening and hopefully everything will work out great =) I hope the two of you have fun at the dungeon!