Long-term DDlg relationships

[Guest buddhagirl]

Hi everyone, I've been thinking about how the relationship between Daddy and I has changed and evolved over time. Of course relationships are always changing (in fact, everything is always changing), but I'd love to hear about how your DDlg dynamic has changed/grown/evolved/devolved with your long-term partner. 

 

For Daddy and me, I've noticed that my need for really strict rules has diminished as my feelings of security and bonding with Daddy increased. I don't push as much or misbehave as much. We have a rhythm, flow and intimate language that sustain the dynamic that we didn't have in the early days. The depth of my submission has increased. I forget I'm wearing my collar 24/7 until someone comments on it--which they do a lot, but I remember that when I was first wearing it I could feel nothing else except it's weight, solidness and strength around my little neck.

 

What has stayed the same is that I still need a lot of Daddy's attention, I still like the same kind of playtime, I still need his approval and validation, I still want and need him to be in control and adore him like no other. My desire for this kind of relationship has not lessened in any way. 

 

Anyway, I'd love to hear about your experiences of how your dynamic has changed during your long-term relationship. 

 

 Thanks

[Little.Wolf]

Although for me it is not really DDlg since I am a switch I can use examples from my other side. I am a domme, or a female dominant. I have had a submissive that's been long distance with me for three years come July 4th. Our relationship has changed drastically. When we first started it was that adjustment period, but I could see right away how he mellowed out. He'd been through a situation where the online Dom had merely used him and left. He quickly found that wasn't me.

 

What really started to solidify it was I created a contract which we both sign and every year I will do a revision to that contract and add or remove things. Spot, as I affectionately call him, has grown in many ways both in his day to day vanilla life with his wife (He is a married, older man, don't worry it's all consented) and work and everything else. Where we first had strict, long set rules, I've scaled back so there are only five main ones that he follows, and the rest is friendship, care, and bonding.

 

I would say it's evolved from constant and strict to routine almost for him and I but it's good as well. Because he also knows that if he ever, and I mean EVER needs to step out of his zone he merely needs to tell me and we can step away from the lifestyle and talk as friends with no judgment.