Seeking Advice on Inlaws

[renba7]

My girlfriend and I, of 4 years, have recently stumbled upon the dd/lg dynamic. We are still exploring how we may fit into this world but are so far enjoying our wet feet, so to speak.

I have always been a bit of a Daddy Dom, but a "soft" version, if you will. She has always been more of a princess than a "little" so I'm not sure how that may color my inquiry. I'm not sure if this is the appropriate forum, but this is as close as I think I'll get to a group of people who will understand the situation.

The issue: She is a rich girl. This is probably why it feels so natural for her to play the role of a submissive princess and probably why I, as a dominant, am attracted to her. But her parents still spoil the hell out of her and it bothers me. I feel oddly jealous when they buy her a pair of $1000 shoes and take us out to over-priced dinners. It feel like someone else is "domming" in my playground. But, it is her family and that is who they are. I don't want to ruin her enjoyment of them and I certainly don't want to impede her or our relationship with them. But this is becoming quite unpleasant, for me. 

Has anyone else been through something similar? Any thoughts that may help?

Thanks. And, again, sorry for posting an only-quasi-DD/lg question in a DD/lg forum. 

[ANewDragon]

So, I have not been is this problem either, But I have been with someone that had money given to her by her parents. Most of the time, it was nice, but did kind of get annoying after a while.

 

So, tori does have a good idea about making her earn the stuff she wears, the problem I see about that, could be that she is expected to wear that to something that you and her are going to with your inlaws.

 

You can always get her the things that she does not get from her parents, though it would also depend on how she is getting the stuff from her parents. If she has a credit card or something like that, that she uses to get the stuff, then it is a little more tricky just cause they may just pay the bill and not care what she charges.

 

For me, this is would be a little harder cause like you, i do not want to give cause any issues. I have to agree with tori that there are other ways to spoil her, Such at attention and affection. I have found that normally those that did not go without as far as had quite a bit of money going up, there was normally a reason for it, and the parents were making up for what they lacked with money. So spoil her in all the other ways, might help. 

 

If that does not work well for you, then I would start by telling her how you feel and why you feel that way. I would not use the example of someone else playing "domming" in your playground. Maybe explain how it hurts that you see her parents able to buy her nice stuff and that you are the one that is suppose to be providing her that type of stuff. Talk to her about maybe not going out to dinner with her family as much. 

 

For me, there is a point in time, when attachment to parents goes from cute and nice, to ok we need some space. I am not talking about having to completely disengage from her parents, but for your relationship to flourish it might need to stand on its own for a while and not have the money coming in from mom and dad. Not saying that they can not buy her gifts for her b-day and christmas, but maybe just not having the parents money around for a month or 2 and see what happens with your relationship might be good for both of you. 

[Guest MyDaddyMyWorld]

Being a daddy has nothing to do with money, unless you identify as a sugar daddy. That's a whole other thing.

Yes, my daddy has more money than me, but that has literally no influence on his dominance and superiority over me.

[Guest Mr TwitchPool]

Good morning and thank you for your post,  

 

I can only echo what others have said, Material items are not the focus of a DDLG relationship, Without knowing how old you are or your financial situation, if you are younger i am sure you will work hard and eventually earn a sufficient wage, however her parents will always spoil her, if she is an only child that too would increase the spoils but I am sure this has always been the case in her life.

 

Although this may make you uncomfortable, you will offer what they cant.

 

Focus on the love you have for each other,  Be pleased if her parents buy her something, but those 1k shoes can not match the $10 stuffie you get her on a day out, or the coloring pictures you place on your fridge, The Pizza and Disney movie night or the trip to the cinema.

 

Be well and good luck

[DaddysLolita]

I have no experience with a situation like this. I agree with all points made though.

 

Focus more on what you do for her, no $1000 pair of shoes or high end food can be better than that.

 

If it continues to be bothersome, talk to her and tell her how you feel. Communication is always best.

 

Best wishes

 

<3

[Guest littlemissragamuffin]

You shouldn't get jealous of her parents. Their her parents, she was their baby first and they are just doing what parents do. I can understand though, exspecially if you can't match the prices they shell out. But money isn't important and there's more to a Daddy Dom than buying things for their Little. And there's other ways to spoil someone than buying them stuff. Doing things, cooking food, plating and bringing them food, setting up what their watching(putting on cartoons/movie/show, getting them something to drink and snack on, blanket and stuffed granimals to watch with), making snack time, setting up coloring time, brushing hair, picking out the day's outfit, helping getting dressed/undressed/changed, spoil with completements, etc

[HerDarkDaddy]

It's a "Daddy" thing...and, by that, I mean EVERY Daddy (and actual father) will have, at least, a touch of resentment towards people that are able to provide things for our littles/kids that we are not able to.  Don't take it personally...they aren't trying to spite you or prove that they are better for her than you are...they are being parents, rich parents.

 

What you need to focus on, is the fact that she CHOSE you! She is with you by choice, and has been happy with that choice for four years.  She knows what you are and are not currently capable of "providing" for her...and she is still happy by your side. You know why?  Because she is with you for what you can (and do) provide for her romantically, emotionally and (probably) sexually.  These are the things she expects from you...the things her parents CAN'T provide. She wants, from you, the things that truly make her happy...not a $1000 pair of shoes that will get thrown away in a short while for another pair of shoes. Material things come and go...but, it is the heart-felt actions and words of others that we will feel and cherish for a lifetime.

 

So, again...don't take it personally that her parents want to share their wealth with her (and you). Save up your pennies and, one night...take THEM out to dinner.  

 

Good luck to you!