Just my thoughts

[MommyDom41]

Good morning Sunshines the earth says hello!

Today I just feel so out of sorts in a way. I honestly just want to put on my sleeper, grab Mr Bunny and sit in someone's lap as they tell it's going to be okay.

I just want to not be little exactly but just be cared for and have someone whisper little Anna it's okay. You don't always have to be big you don't always have to take care of every problem and you don't have to always smile. 

I guess I'm feeling vulnerable because therapy starts soon and I really don't want to go but I have too. I wish I could actually hold someones hand as I go. 

But then I push all those thoughts down and say no Anna you are big you aren't allowed to think this way. You can't be little and you can't act that way. I keep telling myself I have to be big, I have to prove to everyone that I can do all of this because others count on me.

And how terrible of me to even have these silly thoughts when there are so many of you hurting having real problems and I am being selfish. It's not right nor is it fair so please forgive me or better yet just ignore me..

I just feel lonely right now and honestly wish that I could just sit down beside a Caregiver and have them say hey it gets better. I'm not saying I need a caregiver I'm just saying it would be nice to have one say your okay. Or don't cry little one, just something silly like that. 

I do hope you all have a beautiful day and I really am so proud of each of you.

Until we meet again remember you matter, you are loved and you are so worthy of being loved.

[-Soul-]

Oh Miss Anna, I’m sorry things are difficult I promise you it will get better, I will do whatever I can to show you this, you are cared for, you are loved and we appreciate you! All of you, even on your harder days 

sending you hugs

 

soul

[megili]

Of course mommy , it sooo understandable

Therapy is a big thing after all, it wouldn´t be easy for anyone and megili thinks that even the toughest adult want to be little or childish in these moments, just havin someone to be at your side, sayin everythin will be okay, chuu are doin fine. The urge to let you fall yourself so that someone can pick you up, only natural and you are allowed to feel that way , everyone does.

Noo mommy, of course everyone has real problems, but that doesnt mean your problems are less important, and it´s therapy after all this is a serious thingy, you never are selfish, its the opposite you face your demons with courage, you are soooo brave.

Don´t worry mommy, we all will hold your hand and go these steps wif you together, you are after all the most wonderful person ever, and a big part of our family here, so don´t cry little mommy, we are here.

Yes, for megili day is beautiful and megili is very proud of you tooo

Mommy, you are such much worthy tooooo




 

[MommyDom41]

@-Soul- thank you Soul I just really need a hug 

And maybe a cup of chocolate milk

[MommyDom41]

@megili thank you sweet girl I don't mean to be so emotional I wish I could blame on the hormones but sadly I can't 

Thank you for holding my hand

[megili]

ahhh mommy, just blame it on the hormones anyways, everyone understands it then 😊
of course mommy

[DaddyABQ]

51 minutes ago, MommyDom41 said:

And how terrible of me to even have these silly thoughts when there are so many of you hurting having real problems and I am being selfish. It's not right nor is it fair so please forgive me or better yet just ignore me..

I have the same challenge, and I am here to remind you (and myself again) that just because other people are having other kinds of problems doesn't make what you're going through any less real or meaningful. It sounds to me like you're grappling with some core stuff, and that's not a small thing to handle at all.

Remember, what you tell everyone else applies to you as well, and it might be worth looking in the mirror and reminding yourself that you matter and your struggles are real and worthy of attention.

[LeftyGuitar]

Its okay to be worried. I'm sure things will be alright. Big hugs. If I could hold your hand, I would.

[MommyDom41]

@LeftyGuitar thank you

[-Soul-]

See Miss Anna people love you! It will be okay! I promise ☺️☺️

[Aikko]

Therapy is a necessary evil and I am SO proud of you for being brave and taking that step!! It sucks so much because you’ll have to do painful and emotional work, but your future healed self is already looking back thru time and thanking you for doing it. You may not be little but it’s okay to not be big. Imagine you’re little Anna and walking next to you, holding your hand, is 100 year old Anna telling you how proud she is and how thankful she is that you’re doing what needs to be done. If ya need an ear, my inbox is open to you. 💜💜

[MommyDom41]

@Aikko you are so kind and so sweet to everyone! 

Thank you Aikko your words mean so much to me, I honestly needed to hear that..

Thank you for supporting me and for supporting this community. 

You really have no idea how much I just needed that, thank you ❣️