Hello darlings!

[MommyDom41]

Hello everyone on here!

  I wanted to ask the Dom's/Littles out there about how they approach the subject about entering a relationship with one another.

For me I like to wait, i know so many want to jump into a relationship with someone so quickly to be collared or owned. But when you jump quickly it usually won't last and can end in disaster, because you know nothing about one another. 

I want to get to know my little, I want to know what makes them happy, what makes them sad, what they want in life. I know that frustrates so many but it's who I am, I want my little to be able to say she gets me, she understands me. 

I know that might sound strange to some but for me this is who I am. 

Until next time my darlings take care 💖💝💕

[RavenBangtan]

Hii

Personally I wait. I think everything is way too rushed these days. There’s no harm in being friends then that relationship blossoming. 
 

I totally understand dating but that’s exactly it. It’s dating, it’s getting to know someone, their likes and dislikes and what it is they’re looking for. I think a lot of people take the whole ‘talking about relationships’ to mean actually jumping into something. Talking about what you want, where you see yourself in x amount of years or just have a slight idea of what you want it’s great, it’s part of getting to know someone. 
 

I’m a massive believer of communication (if it’s not already clear lmao) especially when it comes the kink aspect of things too. Boundaries need to be firmly established. Like, just because someone is into cg/l doesn’t mean they’re into other kink/bdsm stuff, they may use cg/l as a coping strategy. I think some people think it’s entirely sexual which is why boundaries and communication is huge! 
 

I also think, research and learning from each other is huge too. It’s so easy for people to get taken advantage of. 
 

a relationship is about (for me personally) communication, respect, honesty, loyalty (even if it was to be a poly relationship) fun, compassion, care, love and everything in between. 
 

okaaay I’m getting rambling 🤣 k byeeeee 🦋
 

 

[MommyDom41]

Raven, sweetheart thank you for your kind words and thoughtfulness. I agree waiting is better than jumping into something and regretting it immediately. Which only leads to others getting hurt or you getting hurt.

You're adorable and thank you again Sweetheart 

[DaddyABQ]

Like any relationship, people move at different speeds. I'm highly neurodivergent, and have come to learn that part of how that manifests for me is overpowering desire to leap ten steps ahead immediately despite any of the warning signs that tell me to put on the brakes. This has been something that I've had to learn to temper, and when I am able to keep my intellectual self in the driver's seat, I much prefer getting to know a person and to proceed very carefully.

I'm very much in favor of a measure twice, cut once approach to many of life's choices, and that becomes even more important when I'm getting into a situation that involves not only my heart, but someone else's as well.

[SoulEater]

Different needs with different speeds. While I don’t have a little in the past when I did we took things slowly, as I do in friendship also, we talk, we build foundations and we learn each other, this works for any relationship in my life, some people need more time to trust, others dive deep in. Either way we take it at whatever speed it needs to, fortunately I am an open book these days. I’m happy to talk to anyone about anything really  

[beanbean]

I think so many people want to rush rush rush I think we are all different. But I say be patient and good things might happen sometimes but that’s just me 

[karan]

I guess for me I have the mentality of "we can get to know each other while we are together?" but maybe just because I am impatient, I guess that's what leads me to getting hurt...but I blame myself...

[MommyDom41]

Karan, sweetheart there is nothing wrong with that. And I don't consider that to be impatient most littles when they find a mommy/daddy Dom they like they instantly become attached to that Dom. And that's not a bad thing, a good Dom knows how to set the pace and understand the little/sub is vulnerable and needs attention. 

I hate that you have been hurt so much sweetheart. I'm here if you ever need to talk pumpkin 💕 

[karan]

That makes so much sense ❤️ thank you for explaining.
It's okay I'm used to it, but you even saying you are here for me means alot to me. ❤️

[beanbean]

35 minutes ago, karan said:

I guess for me I have the mentality of "we can get to know each other while we are together?" but maybe just because I am impatient, I guess that's what leads me to getting hurt...but I blame myself...

It happens and like I said we are all different here and what works do me does not work for everyone 

[Little kaiya]

I've always taken a more patient approach. I never wanted to jump into something like Cgl quickly or during the honeymoon phase. For my Daddy and I we talked about Cgl early in our relationship but entering into that dynamic wasn't even on the table for the first 6 months, just as collaring wasn't even on the table for the first year of our relationship.

After being in this space for over 25 years I can say quite confidently that there is a pretty consistent trend, recognizing there are always exceptions. Folks who jump right in typically go from posting a personal to being in a relationship to posting about being hurt over a few months. Those who take time and get to know each other typically spend more time posting about anniversaries that are years long.

This isn't to say jumping in can't work but I will say it typically is done with rose cokoured glasses and when the euphoric high fades people are left realizing they don't really know one another and often don't have a strong foundation for an enduring relationship.

Edited February 21 by Little kaiya

[Bluedragon]

I get a little conflicted here, because I don’t mind going slow, but I also don’t like to talk to a ton of people at the same time. I think if there are too many people in my head I get lost, so even though something isn’t exactly a relationship yet, I still feel a little odd not being exclusive. It’s like I can get confused by who people are just talking to a few.

 

I’ve had relationships last a bit of time being rushed in, and had them last being slow. Personally that hasn’t been what does it in for me or not