little Little guilt?

[Beanie19]

I haven’t been on here in a long time , but it feels nice talking to other littles and daddies and not feel like being little is bad but sometimes it’s hard to be little and not feel guilty or feel bad ,does that ever happen to anyone else ? 
 

When I’m big I take care of people and sometimes it causes me to forget how to be little, I’m still learning more about my little side  I love stuffies and coloring,

I guess my question is how do you deal with that if you feel like that 

Sorry if that sounds weird 

 

[Liamo]

There is no reason to feel guilty for being yourself, as long as you do not hurt anyone in the process. Accepting who we are and feeling well in our own skin is a huge part of success and happiness. I say, embrace being who you are, and love yourself. 

[Ocy]

Hello! I'm still learning as well, so I hope you'll get other answers than mine.

On my part, studying takes a lot of time, so I try not too mix both sides. They are times I can be little and some others I can't. But I don't want to "refuse" myself to be little.

It's okay to be little if that's what you want, there's no guilt in that in my opinion. Do you know what makes you feel guilty about being little? Have asked yourself questions, or taken notes on your feelings? It might help you find what make you tick, and how to remediate it. That's what I usually do when I feel bad about anything. I wish you the best 💙

[-Soul-]

I almost feel it’s a little like Imposter Syndrome, you have spent much of your Big you caring for people that when you go little and are looking to be cared for you feel guilty, but here’s the kicker, it is absolutely A-Okay wanting to be cared for instead of caring! Take the little wins, celebrate little advancements you make while little and before you know it you will be feeling less guilty and almost rewarded. But you have to slowly learn that it’s okay! I promise it is

[beanbean]

1 hour ago, Beanie19 said:

I haven’t been on here in a long time , but it feels nice talking to other littles and daddies and not feel like being little is bad but sometimes it’s hard to be little and not feel guilty or feel bad ,does that ever happen to anyone else ? 
 

When I’m big I take care of people and sometimes it causes me to forget how to be little, I’m still learning more about my little side  I love stuffies and coloring,

I guess my question is how do you deal with that if you feel like that 

Sorry if that sounds weird 

 

Your not being weird at all there have been a lot of threads very similar thru the years so I would venture to say your pretty normal in this

[.คℓ𝐞ﾒเᏰααα .ᐟ]

No guilt. It's not my fault that I have childhood trauma.

But it can be very frustrating when my little headspace decides to thwart my adulting during the day.

[Beanie19]

3 hours ago, Ocy said:

Hello! I'm still learning as well, so I hope you'll get other answers than mine.

On my part, studying takes a lot of time, so I try not too mix both sides. They are times I can be little and some others I can't. But I don't want to "refuse" myself to be little.

It's okay to be little if that's what you want, there's no guilt in that in my opinion. Do you know what makes you feel guilty about being little? Have asked yourself questions, or taken notes on your feelings? It might help you find what make you tick, and how to remediate it. That's what I usually do when I feel bad about anything. I wish you the best 💙

I think I’m just so use to taking care of people that I have to fight myself to let someone take care of me and it mentally exhausting sometimes  but I’m still working on that and thank you for your kind words I appreciate you

[Beanie19]

2 hours ago, SoulEater said:

I almost feel it’s a little like Imposter Syndrome, you have spent much of your Big you caring for people that when you go little and are looking to be cared for you feel guilty, but here’s the kicker, it is absolutely A-Okay wanting to be cared for instead of caring! Take the little wins, celebrate little advancements you make while little and before you know it you will be feeling less guilty and almost rewarded. But you have to slowly learn that it’s okay! I promise it is

Thank you for your kind words your right! Impostor Syndrome is so correct sometimes when I do big things and I’m doing really well I feel like but you can’t do all this it’s not us but when I’m little it’s like you have to be big people need us 

I will celebrate the little wins ☺️

[Beanie19]

11 minutes ago, OuO Alexibaaa said:

No guilt. It's not my fault that I have childhood trauma.

But it can be very frustrating when my little headspace decides to thwart my adulting during the day.

Very true  I didn’t cause my childhood trauma I’m just starting to understand the things I went through 

[Littlejewel]

I don’t think it’s weird at all. In my big life I have to be Very Big and Very Responsible. So when it comes time to be little I feel like I’m slacking off or being a burden. 
 Everyone always says you have to make time for self care so you don’t burn out, so I think of being little as part of my self care. 

[Ocy]

42 minutes ago, Beanie19 said:

I think I’m just so use to taking care of people that I have to fight myself to let someone take care of me and it mentally exhausting sometimes  but I’m still working on that and thank you for your kind words I appreciate you

Working on it, already one hell of a good step! You're welcome, it's no problem at all, I'm happy to help. And I can guess that the messages on this subject help you feel better already 😄

[.คℓ𝐞ﾒเᏰααα .ᐟ]

46 minutes ago, Beanie19 said:

Very true  I didn’t cause my childhood trauma I’m just starting to understand the things I went through 

It never truly goes away, but I promise that it gets easier to deal with, if you put in the necessary effort towards healing.

Finding a good therapist and maintaining mental health check ins with them, is critical to feeling better. It can be done, but it does take work.

[Dessi]

You’re not alone! I definitely struggle with letting the little side out when I’m so used to taking care of other people! 

[redruffle41]

8 hours ago, Beanie19 said:

I think I’m just so use to taking care of people that I have to fight myself to let someone take care of me and it mentally exhausting sometimes  but I’m still working on that and thank you for your kind words I appreciate you

I'm a clinical and trauma informed massage therapist and I live my job but it's literally ALL about the other person all day long. I think I have a hard time letting SOMEONE I DONT TRUST take care of me. If that person has hurt me over and over and over again and I'm living with a constant reminder of disappointment then I'm VERY unable to get into little space. Cuz my little is PISSED and hurt and sad. So. That's my story. Make sure you're safe if u want to be little.

[Beanie19]

11 hours ago, redruffle41 said:

I'm a clinical and trauma informed massage therapist and I live my job but it's literally ALL about the other person all day long. I think I have a hard time letting SOMEONE I DONT TRUST take care of me. If that person has hurt me over and over and over again and I'm living with a constant reminder of disappointment then I'm VERY unable to get into little space. Cuz my little is PISSED and hurt and sad. So. That's my story. Make sure you're safe if u want to be little.

Thank you for saying that that similar to my story so I understand why that may make it a lot harder thank you for sharing your experience I’m sorry you went through that

[Beanie19]

21 hours ago, Littlejewel said:

I don’t think it’s weird at all. In my big life I have to be Very Big and Very Responsible. So when it comes time to be little I feel like I’m slacking off or being a burden. 
 Everyone always says you have to make time for self care so you don’t burn out, so I think of being little as part of my self care. 

That’s a good way to look at it thank you for sharing your experience 

[karan]

Hi Beanie,

There is absolutely no reason to feel guilty or bad for whatever reason about being a little. I am a switch leaning daddy/dom, when I feel little I do not feel guilty because being an adult is already hard enough and we all need some space and time to ourselves to take care of us, we need to be taken care of too. I guess my point is don't feel guilty because you need to be a little one there is no reason not to want to enjoy the little things you do. 

Edited February 13 by karan

[Beanie19]

4 hours ago, karan said:

Hi Beanie,

There is absolutely no reason to feel guilty or bad for whatever reason about being a little. I am a switch leaning daddy/dom, when I feel little I do not feel guilty because being an adult is already hard enough and we all need some space and time to ourselves to take care of us, we need to be taken care of too. I guess my point is don't feel guilty because you need to be a little one there is no reason to want to enjoy the little things you do. 

Thank you I appreciate you, that make sense it’s nice to know even daddies have days too 

[karan]

Hehe yes as a daddy I do have my days, I'm sure others too. You're very welcome 🙂

[LittleBiscut]

Hey Beanie19, when you have a partner that wants to take care of you but sometimes I feel like I need to be big when I want to be little. That’s not a bad thing for me but I still wanna be little without that worry that I am neglecting my partners needs too. Balance is complicated. 🥹🥹☺️☺️😅😅 

[karan]

4 hours ago, LittleBiscut said:

Hey Beanie19, when you have a partner that wants to take care of you but sometimes I feel like I need to be big when I want to be little. That’s not a bad thing for me but I still wanna be little without that worry that I am neglecting my partners needs too. Balance is complicated. 🥹🥹☺️☺️😅😅 

It does tend to get complicated at times and that's okay a daddy would or should understand when his little can have sometime to themselves.

[Beanie19]

5 hours ago, LittleBiscut said:

Hey Beanie19, when you have a partner that wants to take care of you but sometimes I feel like I need to be big when I want to be little. That’s not a bad thing for me but I still wanna be little without that worry that I am neglecting my partners needs too. Balance is complicated. 🥹🥹☺️☺️😅😅 

Balance is complicated especially when you have a tendency to people please for people you care about yeah it’s hard when you feel little but the adult in you is screaming a list of things to do

[LittleBiscut]

Totally agree with you there. But how can you feel constructive in these times? Personally I struggle with it myself but it’s what I try to get better at 🥹🥹🥰