Can we make this work?

[Daddy_Kitten]

Hello everybody 🌸

I'm in some urgent need of advice! I'll try to keep this short.

Daddy and I have been in LDR for a few months. We have already met up and it was absolutely amazing!

Now, here's the issue: Daddy has a very busy life, and right now seems like all the problems are piling up. At first, he gave me so much attention, but right now he's barely there.

I 100% understand how hard life can get, so I dont make demands, however I find it frustrating how my needs are not being met. I end up feeling stupid for feeling needy.

He recently told me how awful and irresponsible he feels for not caring for me, and how he didnt expect LDR to be so hard, and that I should decide what's best for me. 

My problem is, I really really like him and want to see where this leads us, especially because he is my first Daddy, and I'm growing attached. But at the same time I'm afraid nothing is going to change, and I'm going to end up hurting.

 

So, my question is: how do we make this work?

 

Thank you in advance my lovelies 🌸

[Dangerously_Well]

It sounds like you're in a really tough situation, and it's understandable to feel torn between your feelings for your Daddy and your own needs. It's great that you're trying to find a way to make things work, and I'm happy to offer some support and suggestions.

First of all, please know that your feelings are valid. It's perfectly normal to feel needy and frustrated when your needs aren't being met in a relationship, especially one that involves the caregiving dynamic of DDlg. Don't feel stupid for wanting attention and support from your Daddy – those are natural desires.

It's also admirable that you're trying to be understanding of his busy life and the challenges he's facing. It sounds like he's aware of the situation and feels bad about not being able to give you the attention you deserve. That's a good sign, as it shows that he cares about you and the relationship.

Here are a few suggestions that might help you navigate this situation:

1. Open and Honest Communication:

• Talk to your Daddy: Have an open and honest conversation about your feelings and needs. Explain how his lack of attention is affecting you, and what kind of support you're hoping for. Be specific about your needs and expectations.
• Active Listening: Listen to his perspective and try to understand his challenges. Empathy and understanding are crucial for navigating any relationship hurdle.

2. Finding Solutions Together:

• Brainstorm Solutions: Work together to find solutions that address both of your needs. Perhaps you can schedule specific times for calls or video chats, even if they're short. Maybe you can explore other ways to connect, like sending each other letters or small gifts.
• Compromise: Be willing to compromise and adjust your expectations. LDRs require flexibility and understanding from both sides.

3. Prioritizing Self-Care:

• Focus on Yourself: While you're navigating this challenge, remember to prioritize your own well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, and connect with friends and family for support.
• Set Boundaries: Don't be afraid to set boundaries to protect your emotional health. If you're feeling consistently neglected or unsupported, it's okay to communicate that and take a step back if needed.

4. Reassessing the Situation:

• Give it Time: Give the new strategies some time to work. Relationships go through ups and downs, and it's possible to overcome this challenge with open communication and effort.
• Re-evaluate: If things don't improve, it's okay to re-evaluate the relationship and decide if it's truly meeting your needs. You deserve to be with someone who can give you the care and attention you deserve.

Remember, you're not alone in this. This community is here to support you, and there are many other online and in-person resources available.

Sending you love and strength. 💖

[beanbean]

yep basically what was said above make sure you talk about possible solutions like maybe incorporating a date night or something so you guys do get time to grow together.

[DashingDaddyDom]

This is my fear when it comes to when I end up going back and finishing med school. It's always in the back of my head but I feel like if I found the right person the communication works itself out. I've had a couple of times in my life where I did get busy and communication was the saving grace.

From the sounds of it I wouldn't worry. Your relationship sounds very strong and you're just dealing with something new that you have to find a new rhythm for. But the make or break is if you want to be in a relationship with that person for the long term. It doesn't even sound like a question in your mind. Just take some deep breaths cause it sounds like it'll work itself out.