Why do people Ghost here?

[Bloom]

Ok so I have been on this website for some time and tye only thing u have observed that have stayed consistent is the fact that people here Ghost. Very easily. Very fast. They just don't care. 

Also from my experience it's generally the CG....which makes it so ironically funny because aren't you supposed to be responsible and knoe how to communicate like an adult. 

I guess that really shows just how many fake people or CG are on the platform. 

But again I am only saying this from my personal experience if you have experienced something else that's OK. I am just sharing what I feel. 

Because this is very frustating for me.

[mittendaddy]

Speaking as a CG ghosting goes both ways. I've had more littles ghost me than I have fingers and toes. It happens across all sites, not just this one. I think it speaks to people's belief that what happens online isn't real, that their words do not matter, and they can come and go as they want and not feel as though they have any obligation for communication. I've had to step away from this life multiple times out of sheer frustration.

All that being said, there are many of us out here, CGs and littles, that have gone through what you describe. We just have to pick ourselves up .dust ourselves off, and keep moving forward.

[DaddyRaven]

mittendaddy's correct.  if I had a nickel for every Little that ghosted me, I'd be taking my dream vacation.  

[prissybaby]

1 hour ago, DaddyRaven said:

mittendaddy's correct.  if I had a nickel for every Little that ghosted me, I'd be taking my dream vacation.  

Actually, I didn't ghost you, I was working and I got tired and I forgot to respond.

[DaddyRaven]

3 minutes ago, prissybaby said:

Actually, I didn't ghost you, I was working and I got tired and I forgot to respond.

oh i wasn't talking about u 

[prissybaby]

8 minutes ago, DaddyRaven said:

oh i wasn't talking about u 

I tried to send you another message and it wouldn't let me.

[DaddyRaven]

3 minutes ago, prissybaby said:

I tried to send you another message and it wouldn't let me.

let me check 

[DaddyRaven]

9 minutes ago, prissybaby said:

I tried to send you another message and it wouldn't let me.

ok; I sent a follower request; i'll explain in private.  

[prissybaby]

14 minutes ago, DaddyRaven said:

ok; I sent a follower request; i'll explain in private.  

Okay, I accepted. ♡ 

[Sammykins]

This is so tough! Ghosting is never a fun experience but I also wouldn't automatically assume its because they are fake. People can be flakey/ghosting for a lot of reasons that are completely harmless it doesn't excuse the behavior but can make the situation more bearable, like mittendaddy said, pick up, dust ourselves off and keep going! Hugs and hope it gets better 

[Sincerity]

It is sad, especially when you talk to someone day and night for a few months, they can still ghost you just so easily

[LunaLilac]

If it makes you feel better, and it won't. I've been ghosted by everyone in my life. I think they feel its just easier to walk away without saying anything than actually confront you and tell you what the problem is, or that it's over. But it's an act of cowardice and it hurts, so much.

They might be able to just walk away, but the ghosted will have all of the pain dumped on them, and an endless parade of questions that follows that makes them worry that everything and anything they say, did, or are is wrong and a problem, and that will slowly erode them inside, they'll question everything about themselves, and learn to hate and hide everything about themselves, just to try to prevent being abandoned again.

And then comes the second guessing "they wouldn't leave I just need to be more patient", or "they're coming back", and those questions eat away at them preventing them from trying to move on, leaving them trapped in a bad mental space deluding themselves hoping that someone wouldn't just abandon them.

If you're going to leave that sucks, it does, but say something. ANYTHING.

[Cebakes]

It’s very unfortunate when people choose to simply disappear and not at least drop someone a message and briefly explain their thought process. I’ve never been with anyone for weeks and months and ghosted them or been ghosted myself, but I’ve experienced being ghosted by someone I was getting to know or interested in.   I will say, in dating and chatting with women on different sites,  I think it’s become much easier for people to simply hit delete and quickly move on to the next new person.  

[dorkydaddydom]

As others have said already it happens both ways. If you're a little you're usually gonna interact with more daddys, if you're a daddy you're usually gonna interact with more littles, so obviously whichever side you're on seems to be ghosted more as you don't have much insight into the other. It's not limited to this site or a particularly big problem here though, actually I'd say it's significantly less of an issue here due to the more community and friendly focus instead of a dating focus. Fetlife and reddit on the other hand.....

I say there's several layers to ghosting.

Some of it is fair and justified, for example when you're dealing with a jerk, an abusive person,... I personally would still rip into them or troll and then leave but I understand it's much easier and much better for mental health for most to just block and leave.

Then there's convos that just fizzle out and don't go anywhere. I'd still prefer if people spoke their mind before leaving and I always try to, but realistically it often ends up in just ghosting and I'm guilty of that myself. What really is frustrating in this scenario though is if you try to conversate but the other person is unresponsive and gives one word answers but still claims to be interested. How am I supposed to lead a convo (which I don't mind doing mind you) when all I ever get back is "okay", "yes", "no", "idk" and even open ended questions like "what are your hobbies" are responded to with a short list and nothing else.

The last one is the really problematic kind of ghosting and I've had my fair share of experiencing it. It's when people feint interest and attachment, you have seemingly good convos for days or weeks and then all of a sudden... poof, gone. I think this is mainly found in online dating scenarios but not exclusively and it's so jarring and damaging. Often times that's people who talk to several potential partners at once (which in itself is to be expected and is okay mind you) feint interest into all of them and then just ghost on anyone who isn't their chosen. Even worse is when someone pretends to actually like you and care for you or even agrees to a dynamic and then randomly disappears without a word. I've heard excuses like "maybe they're just not good at it" or "maybe they just don't want to hurt you". But I really couldn't care less, you're the same awful person than those who do it on purpose as far as I'm concerned. You're on a kink/dating site so you're obviously an adult. Fucking act like it.

Quite a rant haha.

Edited November 6, 2024 by dorkydaddydom

[GiantTeddyBear]

Honestly, I don't take offense to it anymore. It's a part of this culture now in the dating world. Now if people feel I have ghosted them before it's mostly due to how I carry out trying to manage life and conversation. I don't always wish to carry the conversation, my general premise that I follow is "if you reply I will reply" generally that gets conversation to be a two way street. If I reply and someone just leaves me on read, that is perfectly okay! People are busy, but I will also be busy myself on times. What I won't do is constantly send messages one sidedly. Working two Jobs, having hobbies, and friends that want me to be around them gives me little time to constantly try and have a conversation.  If I am trying to get to know someone why would I invest 100% if I am getting maybe 50% return if not less. 

Now people are how they are and I also forget to reply at times. Now if it's been weeks since the communication has stopped, I'm going to take it as the person moved on.  Which is still okay! They weren't my little or partner just someone who was a tiny sparkle in my life. Which leads to an unfriend because it doesn't seem any attempt is being made to keep a friendship. It's gotta be a two way street for any relationship. 

[OuO Alexibaaa]

In my 20+ years experience of being chronically online, people ghost everywhere and for any number of reasons. Boredom with the site in question and irl problems seems to be the two biggest culprits though.

And the occasional, "I forgot my password, send halp!"

It just happens~

Edited November 14, 2024 by OuO Alexibaaa

[ExtraCurious]

Daddies and babies all have a secret idea of their ideal: his age, height, weight, looks, income, the way he acts(these are the basics) also attentiveness and belief system(for example liberal or conservative, religious or modern)

There is also the matter of time. A lot of the littles here really can't or don't or won't give time. The same with the daddies. Same with the kind of communication and or relationship. IRL/Online/etc... A great deal of the people on here would rather stay on DDLG forums forever. Or are just curious and they want to find out what this relationship is. 

Then I think there is a deeper level where someone doesn't feel the other person is their type. I wrote one person 38 messages(texts too) and chatted 2 weeks asked for a basic face photo (could be filtered) for privacy and they refused. I felt that they weren't interested enough for me to continue so I told them bye.

Another person I talked to told me they wanted a TradWife relationship and I didn't want that. They were really upset after a audio conversation but I stated clearly I don't want that but I still answered. 

It's just really hard to find someone...who is compatible...you have to try a lot! Unfortunately wasting time is a bad idea  P.S. I'll give you a big hint on how to find a person that is really compatible spend 3 months chatting every night if you get that far it's probably got some hope. A gal I know spent 3 years on the phone nightly though with a guy during Covid(Daddydom) he ghosted her when the meeting day came WHOA

Edited November 14, 2024 by ExtraCurious

[SaltyChindit]

There's really no excuse for 'ghosting'... it's very gauche and improper unless someone raises an immediate red flag. It's easy enough to say to someone... 'I don't think this will work because of x' then delete the chat/block at one's discretion...

Things may fizzle out (or burn out when they go too quickly). With online and distance it is very 'easy' to just cut things off without explanation and that isn't really cricket.

Edited November 22, 2024 by SaltyChindit