Don't lose yourself in the dynamic

[Capri]

Just a post to get some thoughts out. Some mix of a rant and reminder. 

As much as I love the idea of this relationship dynamic as a little, I don't want to be seen as a little without being seen as my own person.  I don't want the role to consume my identity, and I am not looking for someone just to fit into a role for me either. I want to know you as a person, the real you. 

Made a personal ad a little over a month ago and have chatted with some interesting people, but some of the experience has made me a bit frustrated. 

Reading things like "Have you found a daddy yet? I can help you babygirl" is starting to annoy me. 

As if I'm waiting for some magical daddy is going to come and sweep me off my feet.  It's really not that simple.  Yes I want a daddy but I'm not going to jump into the arms of just any guy that calls himself a daddy and open myself to getting hurt in the process.  Likewise, I'd like to hope caregivers don't start babying every other little they see. 

Being a little or submissive doesn't mean that I am easy or should be looked down on.  Yes it is a power exchange, but it is from my own choice to give that control to someone I truly love and trust first. So don't feel bad for me that I haven't found a daddy yet or pretend to pity me.  It's a decision I made.  I would gladly spend months of lonely nights alone than lower myself to please the likes of someone who is undeserving. 

Even if it takes time to find a good relationship within the dynamic, I'm fine with waiting for the right person who sees me for who I am outside of the labels or kinks. Hopefully it'll be worth the wait.  

[Huggybear]

Uuuuh Snappp!!!! Some boys got called out 😅. Love it!

Seems like some things never change, this behaviour has haunted this dynamic since the dawn of its birth.

Sad thing is there are copious amounts of girls who fall for that behaviour, and 4 months later we read about their heartbreak right here, how they got ignored, shelved or ghosted.

Guys and Girls! Remember to read the safety first and flag detection topic by Shadowrider before messaging anyone here. Especially if youre new :).

Lets be respectful to eachother!

 

 

[Capri]

14 minutes ago, Huggybear said:

Uuuuh Snappp!!!! Some boys got called out 😅. Love it!

Seems like some things never change, this behaviour has haunted this dynamic since the dawn of its birth.

Sad thing is there are copious amounts of girls who fall for that behaviour, and 4 months later we read about their heartbreak right here, how they got ignored, shelved or ghosted.

Guys and Girls! Remember to read the safety first and flag detection topic by Shadowrider before messaging anyone here. Especially if youre new :).

Lets be respectful to eachother!

 

 

 

Respectfully roasted 😊🔥

[Prin3ssKittyy]

I've alr been dealing with so many ppl like this.. it's so frustrating and I def get it :C

it almost feels...shallow? People only want to be their roles and nothing else. They dont seem to care about building an actual relationship outside of the roleplay aspects 

 

[Capri]

Just now, Prin3ssKittyy said:

I've alr been dealing with so many ppl like this.. it's so frustrating and I def get it :C

it almost feels...shallow? People only want to be their roles and nothing else. They dont seem to care about building an actual relationship outside of the roleplay aspects 

 

Definitely feels shallow and annoying to deal with and sorry you had to go through that too

Roles should add to relationships, not the other way around. A relationship only centered on roles isn't gonna last long once the feeling of lust/attraction settles down. 

[beanbean]

5 hours ago, Capri said:

Just a post to get some thoughts out. Some mix of a rant and reminder. 

As much as I love the idea of this relationship dynamic as a little, I don't want to be seen as a little without being seen as my own person.  I don't want the role to consume my identity, and I am not looking for someone just to fit into a role for me either. I want to know you as a person, the real you. 

Made a personal ad a little over a month ago and have chatted with some interesting people, but some of the experience has made me a bit frustrated. 

Reading things like "Have you found a daddy yet? I can help you babygirl" is starting to annoy me. 

As if I'm waiting for some magical daddy is going to come and sweep me off my feet.  It's really not that simple.  Yes I want a daddy but I'm not going to jump into the arms of just any guy that calls himself a daddy and open myself to getting hurt in the process.  Likewise, I'd like to hope caregivers don't start babying every other little they see. 

Being a little or submissive doesn't mean that I am easy or should be looked down on.  Yes it is a power exchange, but it is from my own choice to give that control to someone I truly love and trust first. So don't feel bad for me that I haven't found a daddy yet or pretend to pity me.  It's a decision I made.  I would gladly spend months of lonely nights alone than lower myself to please the likes of someone who is undeserving. 

Even if it takes time to find a good relationship within the dynamic, I'm fine with waiting for the right person who sees me for who I am outside of the labels or kinks. Hopefully it'll be worth the wait.  

I think your being smart and that the big difference too some of these people they get her desperate for anything they settle and you see with in the first day littles have a dome for a day . And so your spoe and smart approach is smart ask lots of questions and get to know people first it could save you a lot of heartache 

[beanbean]

3 hours ago, Huggybear said:

Uuuuh Snappp!!!! Some boys got called out 😅. Love it!

Seems like some things never change, this behaviour has haunted this dynamic since the dawn of its birth.

Sad thing is there are copious amounts of girls who fall for that behaviour, and 4 months later we read about their heartbreak right here, how they got ignored, shelved or ghosted.

Guys and Girls! Remember to read the safety first and flag detection topic by Shadowrider before messaging anyone here. Especially if youre new :).

Lets be respectful to eachother!

 

 

 

Like I said before plenty of desperate littles that do the same thing or just snatch up the first from that come along or talks to more Daddy's at once and plays them off each other the answer is take your time

[Little kaiya]

Yup, but no matter how many times experienced people in the community try to share advice with new folks so many young littles think they know everything, jump in head first then end up crying about it a few weeks later.

[beanbean]

2 minutes ago, Little kaiya said:

Yup, but no matter how many times experienced people in the community try to share advice with new folks so many young littles think they know everything, jump in head first then end up crying about it a few weeks later.

Lol I still keep trying maybe I am insane 😂 

[daisy_cat]

I've run into similar experiences as well. I want potential Caregivers to know that I am more than the label or the lifestyle. Yes, it is a big part of me, but I'm also a really cool person to get to know outside of it! 

Big red flags are when a caregiver already wants me to call them "Daddy," "Mommy," etc. Another is when they are giving me little petnames. I'm like "bro, you don't know me that well and I don't know you that well! Why don't we get to know each other first before we start with the names?"

That's why I made clear in my "About Me" section that I'm not interested in anything casual or disingenuous. I want someone willing to be my best friend, my partner, and caregiver. And I'm willing to wait for that right person ^-^ ♡

[Little kaiya]

All of this highlight the many, many reasons I'm glad I found my Daddy and don't have to wade through the dating scene.