To Be Witnessed

[Andriel_Isilien]

"The human soul doesn’t want to be advised or fixed or saved. It simply wants to be witnessed — to be seen, heard and companioned exactly as it is."

I have been thinking about this quote for a couple of weeks. I will welcome advice, being fixed, or saved when I seek it. But until then, nearly every attempt feels violating. It tells me that my existence is a problem disrupting the peace. It tells me that minding my own business while limiting the harm I do is never good enough. It tells me that I am not allowed to take up space. It tells me that I responsible for managing the discomfort of others.

This why I like animals so much because they are that silent companionship. There is no projection onto me about insecurities. Animals can feel emotions but they don't gaslight, manipulate, judge, or abuse. Animals usually know how to manage themselves, better than most people. With animals, I feel seen, heard, and accepted. Of course, there are some people who have such skills and become my friends. But more often than not, it is my own species that wound me deeply. I'll take getting my hand bitten or arms scratched up by animals (which I do very often) rather than endure verbal mistreatment from a fellow human in order to be "nice".

What I crave is simple: validation. I need to be seen during whatever I'm going through. I need to be heard as I process my emotions. I need to be accepted for being me. I want to improve myself enough as it is without the outside criticism. I struggle to have the patience and grace during my journey because I can already sense that others see me as a "problem" or a "project".

Animals (furred, feathered, or scaled) don't do any of that. They merely witness me being there with them. Translating behaviors can be figured out with a bit of homework. But even before that, there is this consistency that's hard to describe with animals. Around animals, I am enough with more potential to discover.

I appreciate the people who can listen and be a good friend by simply being there for me. I hope I can reciprocate or at least pass that support on. Those are indeed precious skills.

It's just, animals have yet to fail me with their intentions.