Social ability of a freeze dried potato

[RedPandaBiker]

How does one overcome event/meets social anxiety? Like I wanna go to these things because I feel like it would help in my quest of what I'm looking for, but I'm more of the observer type instead of the initiator type. 

 

Suggestions /tips? 

~P

[Little kaiya]

Honestly, practice. If you want to go then go. Start by observing then slowly move to interacting with one person. Then slowly more and so on.

[Kali]

Hmmmm... I also find it hard to take that leap. I really, really, really need to want to do something before I pull up my big girl panties and fake it til I make it. 

The last event I went to had a wonderful host who was familiar with social anxiety. When we first spoke, I let her know I was shy and can be social awkward. She took the time to talk with me, explain the event and answer any questions I had. She even made me feel super comfortable when I explained I'd need to bring my pupper. 

I learned that you don't know unless you ask and people often surprise you! Now I'll be more comfortable attending event put on my that host. Baby steps! 😄

[MysticSand]

I feel the same often and agree with the above commenters.

I liken social gatherings to how people describe going to the gym: Everything leading up to it and even during it is soooo hard, but afterwards I'm glad I did it.

It it helps, I tell myself to mentally take on a different "persona" during social gatherings. We've always playing different roles in different spaces, so why not at social gatherings too if it's a new experience? I put on my "let's smile lots, mimic body language, and do your best to project 'social butterfly'" when really inside I'm just thinking when an acceptable time to leave is. 😆

Once you're actually in the thick of it, one suggestion/tip is to have food or a drink in hand so that at least you don't have to take up mental space by being cognizant of what you should do with your hands.  Then, talk about stuff that everyone can relate to in the here and now such as how nice the vendor space is, if it's their first time to such an event, what types of food/drink there are, and etc.

If you're working up to just attending the event, what @Kali mentioned is really smart. You can also message the organizer before the event to ask a bit on how the flow of things usually go and what to expect, and then look for them once you arrive so at least you "know" someone who's there already.

[Guest BabyBug]

4 hours ago, Little kaiya said:

Honestly, practice. If you want to go then go. Start by observing then slowly move to interacting with one person. Then slowly more and so on.

I'm this way, especially with lots of new people. I stay quiet, and watch until I feel more comfortable talking with others. It got easier after I made a friend. Having someone with you helps a lot!