Am I overreacting?

[Guest BabyBug]

Here recently I've had someone close to me intruded into my littlespace, read my personal stuff, my little book and letters to my daddy...and more. My safe place doesn't feel safe anymore and I don't know what to do about it. Impulsive me feels the need to trash everything and start from scratch, but I know better. The feeling is still there. I don't know how to make the space feel like it's mine again.

[beanbean]

Wow that's crazy I am sorry that happened to you it should never happen and that person should not be trusted again but you can't let them ruin your little space ether 

[Guest BabyBug]

It's just hard, this is a family member, and when they come over they tend to just barge in and disrupt things. I don't hide who I am, and sometimes I play and color more openly but other times I want to be alone. And I'm starting to think the intrusion is on purpose. 

[beanbean]

I know it's hard . But screw them you are who you are and there is no way you should ever change that

[Guest BabyBug]

No way I'm changing for anyone, I'm not even sure I can at this point. Like a lot of littles I've just always been this way! I just wish, that even though I'm open about this, I had more respect as a person and respect for my personal space.

[Kittyara207]

I am so sorry that happened to you.   Wish the best.   Hugs

[Guest BabyBug]

1 hour ago, gigisweetheart said:

I have had my personal room violated as well before and it feels terrible. Do you think taking things all down and maybe rearranging your room, even treating yourself to some new accessories, furniture, or plants would help? Maybe even a new coat of paint or fun decals? I would also consider buying a lock for the rooms you don’t want someone to intrude on. Changing door handles isn’t too hard or expensive. 🥺

I like the idea of changing things up a little! 

[MysticSand]

You're definitely not overreacting. I think I'm a super private person because I've always had every inch of privacy invaded of mine and so I tend to never give any information because I find at last I have some control over parts of my life. Which is different from your situation because you're open about your lifestyle, but still, I'm sure many of the things they read were not things that were meant to be shared, especially when not on your terms.

Did they snoop in your room without your knowledge? Or did they barge in and go through things with you in the room? I think if you're able to, it might be worthwhile to get like a small bin that's lockable, so at least you can put the more treasured and private things in there like letters between your daddy and you or things that you just want to be for your eyes only. You can make it into a DIY craft project and decorate the outside of it to make it all cute and maybe even jewel embedded too!

[Guest BabyBug]

3 minutes ago, MysticSand said:

You're definitely not overreacting. I think I'm a super private person because I've always had every inch of privacy invaded of mine and so I tend to never give any information because I find at last I have some control over parts of my life. Which is different from your situation because you're open about your lifestyle, but still, I'm sure many of the things they read were not things that were meant to be shared, especially when not on your terms.

Did they snoop in your room without your knowledge? Or did they barge in and go through things with you in the room? I think if you're able to, it might be worthwhile to get like a small bin that's lockable, so at least you can put the more treasured and private things in there like letters between your daddy and you or things that you just want to be for your eyes only. You can make it into a DIY craft project and decorate the outside of it to make it all cute and maybe even jewel embedded too!

It was while I was at work, but they do tend to barge in when they are there without knocking too. I usually keep my little book on me, I work long sometimes boring shifts. But I like the idea of decorating something with a lock!

[Cebakes]

Have you ever tried to establish boundaries with this person and tell them that that is not permissible?    As mentioned, Is there a way to secure your room or private belongings? 

[LongTimeMe]

Intrusion into your personal things is not nice. Two options come to mind:

1) Can you store important and really private things like messages purely in an electronic format? If so then get yourself a USB memory stick and put a security code on it that only you know. Don't use your birthday or something that can easily be guessed. You could then easily carry this with you round your neck on a lanyard.

2) Not that I advocate an eye-for-an-eye policy but what if you returned the "favour" and did the same to the other person. How might they react? Might they then see how you feel and stop?

[Vampiress]

Can you put some kind of lock on your door? There's all kinds of solutions on Amazon, even ones that doesn't require you to install anything with nails or screws.

[Guest BabyBug]

All great suggestions you guys! Thank you. As for a I do have a lock on my door, on this particular occasion my door wasn't locked. It was an oversight on my part, I work nights, 12 hrs shifts, and I had very little sleep. I've tried setting boundaries with this person, but it's not done any good.

Right now I'm just going to change a few things up to make my space mine again.