Bought my first little gear excited but scared?

[Yoshi_Yoshi]

So I been further exsploring my little side and figuring out what being little means to me. And I recently invested in some gear *pacifier, Onsie, ect...* and at first I was really excited, until today.

One of my orders came earlier than expected and I had to rush it to my room, without riding suspicion from my parents (with whome I still love with). I realized I have virtually no where to put anything and I guess things got real. For me buying this stuff officially ment I was going down the little path, and as i was making mess of room trying find a hiding spot for diapers of all things I couldn't help but feel like this meant I would never be normal? Like there was a part of me who always hoped I'd outgrow my little tendencies, and while I'm happy to embrace it now I am also scared out of my mind. Any advice?

[Little kaiya]

"Normal" is such an awful word in my mind. It tries to force people to be some version of themselves that society wants than to just be themself.

I'm 45 and have a bunch of little stuff, clothes, diaper bags, stuffies, pacifiers and a Daddy. That's all just my normal. At the end of the day you are who you are and there's nothing wrong with that. You can either accept yourself or spend time fighting it and accept yourself later.

Do you and don't worry.

[MasterPhotog]

Congratulations on embracing your side and investing in some little gear. 

While you remind and convince your parents to respect your privacy, think of a safe place for your little stuff however, keep a good reason ready just in case they still find it. 

As far as the onesie goes, just say you like it due to how soft or cute it is and how good it makes you feel. Tell them some of your friends also have onesies. 

Hope it helps, best of luck. 

 

[CodeName: Trouble]

I totally get how you feel, I just moved out of my parents house this past year and very strongly remember the fear of discovery when I first started getting little gear, much the same as you. I have a few suggestions, they might not work for your situation, but I had success with this strategy.

What I did to help hide my little stuff was getting a (not see through) tote from Walmart that had a hole in the lid for adding a lock. You can get a combination lock and add it on for extra security. You could also get a tote that fits under your bed, lay an extra blanket in it, put your little stuff in the blanket, and wrap it up like a burrito. If anyone asks its your extra bedding, or clothes that are out of season right now. You're an adult so they have no reason to look through your things... but I know some parents can't help themselves. thats why I got a lock 😉

As far as packages go, you could try to utilize FedEx pick up locations. some places like Walgreens or Doller general will accept packages for you and you can pick them up to avoid them going to your house. Dont worry about the workers reading the package label, little gear usually ships pretty discreetly and unless they recognize the names from their own interest, things like "strom holdings" or whatever etsy provider sent it wont mean anything to most people. Not that employees even care enough to read labels or be nosy, I've worked in places like that before and trust me no one cares.

Amazon also has pickup locations, but I'm not as familiar with how those work 🤔

It can all be pretty spooky, and having to sneak around to do the things you like isn't a good feeling. But remember - you're feelings are valid, you are valid, and you aren't doing anything wrong 💚Even with my daddy I'm still kinda shy about some of my little stuff/activities(we are still new to living together) - but the feelings that I was doing something wrong has vanished. Try to surround yourself with as much support as possible, being places like this really helps.

Bonus: Beware the binge purge cycle!

This is when you get super excited, buy allot of stuff, then feel shame or guilt about it and end up throwing it away. At some point I'm sure we've all had a feeling that we just want to throw all our little things out and leave it all behind us. This can lead to allot of money wasted and sad feelings if/when the desires for these things return. Some people do 'grow out of' this chapter in their life, but allot of us dont. If you start to feel overwhelmed or burnt out, its okay to pack your stuff away for a while, but I'd avoid throwing things out. When I moved I got rid of allot of my onesies and I regret it bigtime.

[Vampiress]

For smaller items you can look on etsy for these plushies that people make with a hidden jar inside of them. I found a bunch just now looking up "plushie jar" on there, but you can also look up "plushie stash jar." Then you can pretend you're like a little squirrel stashing away your acorns just for fun. I also love CodeName: Trouble's suggestions!

[Yoshi_Yoshi]

21 hours ago, Little kaiya said:

"Normal" is such an awful word in my mind. It tries to force people to be some version of themselves that society wants than to just be themself.

I'm 45 and have a bunch of little stuff, clothes, diaper bags, stuffies, pacifiers and a Daddy. That's all just my normal. At the end of the day you are who you are and there's nothing wrong with that. You can either accept yourself or spend time fighting it and accept yourself later.

Do you and don't worry.

Thank you so much, your words helped me alot 🥹

[Yoshi_Yoshi]

20 hours ago, MasterPhotog said:

Congratulations on embracing your side and investing in some little gear. 

While you remind and convince your parents to respect your privacy, think of a safe place for your little stuff however, keep a good reason ready just in case they still find it. 

As far as the onesie goes, just say you like it due to how soft or cute it is and how good it makes you feel. Tell them some of your friends also have onesies. 

Hope it helps, best of luck. 

 

Thank you, you make it sound so easy. But your right I should definitely have a talk with my parents 😅

[Yoshi_Yoshi]

8 hours ago, CodeName: Trouble said:

I totally get how you feel, I just moved out of my parents house this past year and very strongly remember the fear of discovery when I first started getting little gear, much the same as you. I have a few suggestions, they might not work for your situation, but I had success with this strategy.

What I did to help hide my little stuff was getting a (not see through) tote from Walmart that had a hole in the lid for adding a lock. You can get a combination lock and add it on for extra security. You could also get a tote that fits under your bed, lay an extra blanket in it, put your little stuff in the blanket, and wrap it up like a burrito. If anyone asks its your extra bedding, or clothes that are out of season right now. You're an adult so they have no reason to look through your things... but I know some parents can't help themselves. thats why I got a lock 😉

As far as packages go, you could try to utilize FedEx pick up locations. some places like Walgreens or Doller general will accept packages for you and you can pick them up to avoid them going to your house. Dont worry about the workers reading the package label, little gear usually ships pretty discreetly and unless they recognize the names from their own interest, things like "strom holdings" or whatever etsy provider sent it wont mean anything to most people. Not that employees even care enough to read labels or be nosy, I've worked in places like that before and trust me no one cares.

Amazon also has pickup locations, but I'm not as familiar with how those work 🤔

It can all be pretty spooky, and having to sneak around to do the things you like isn't a good feeling. But remember - you're feelings are valid, you are valid, and you aren't doing anything wrong 💚Even with my daddy I'm still kinda shy about some of my little stuff/activities(we are still new to living together) - but the feelings that I was doing something wrong has vanished. Try to surround yourself with as much support as possible, being places like this really helps.

Bonus: Beware the binge purge cycle!

This is when you get super excited, buy allot of stuff, then feel shame or guilt about it and end up throwing it away. At some point I'm sure we've all had a feeling that we just want to throw all our little things out and leave it all behind us. This can lead to allot of money wasted and sad feelings if/when the desires for these things return. Some people do 'grow out of' this chapter in their life, but allot of us dont. If you start to feel overwhelmed or burnt out, its okay to pack your stuff away for a while, but I'd avoid throwing things out. When I moved I got rid of allot of my onesies and I regret it bigtime.

Thank you for such a well thought out response! I actually really like the tote idea ❤️

[Yoshi_Yoshi]

6 hours ago, Vampiress said:

For smaller items you can look on etsy for these plushies that people make with a hidden jar inside of them. I found a bunch just now looking up "plushie jar" on there, but you can also look up "plushie stash jar." Then you can pretend you're like a little squirrel stashing away your acorns just for fun. I also love CodeName: Trouble's suggestions!

Yeah I've heard those, the crafter in me wants to try to make my own. Plus I'm always down to pretend to be a squirrel

[Guest Lulu Darling]

I feel you ♡ exploring this side of me is so thrilling and terrifying at the same time. I bought my first pacie and some toys recently and it just feels so amazing to express myself in that way and to enjoy myself for once ♡

[Guest BabyBug]

Yaaay! Congrats on your new gear!!! It's exciting isn't, but nerve-wracking too! Especially if you have to hide it, hopefully you have some privacy so you can explore and feel safe at the same time. If not the I agree that a lock is best until your comfortable with others knowing.

[SeamonkeyBrains]

On 5/18/2023 at 9:51 AM, CodeName: Trouble said:

I totally get how you feel, I just moved out of my parents house this past year and very strongly remember the fear of discovery when I first started getting little gear, much the same as you. I have a few suggestions, they might not work for your situation, but I had success with this strategy.

What I did to help hide my little stuff was getting a (not see through) tote from Walmart that had a hole in the lid for adding a lock. You can get a combination lock and add it on for extra security. You could also get a tote that fits under your bed, lay an extra blanket in it, put your little stuff in the blanket, and wrap it up like a burrito. If anyone asks its your extra bedding, or clothes that are out of season right now. You're an adult so they have no reason to look through your things... but I know some parents can't help themselves. thats why I got a lock 😉

As far as packages go, you could try to utilize FedEx pick up locations. some places like Walgreens or Doller general will accept packages for you and you can pick them up to avoid them going to your house. Dont worry about the workers reading the package label, little gear usually ships pretty discreetly and unless they recognize the names from their own interest, things like "strom holdings" or whatever etsy provider sent it wont mean anything to most people. Not that employees even care enough to read labels or be nosy, I've worked in places like that before and trust me no one cares.

Amazon also has pickup locations, but I'm not as familiar with how those work 🤔

It can all be pretty spooky, and having to sneak around to do the things you like isn't a good feeling. But remember - you're feelings are valid, you are valid, and you aren't doing anything wrong 💚Even with my daddy I'm still kinda shy about some of my little stuff/activities(we are still new to living together) - but the feelings that I was doing something wrong has vanished. Try to surround yourself with as much support as possible, being places like this really helps.

Bonus: Beware the binge purge cycle!

This is when you get super excited, buy allot of stuff, then feel shame or guilt about it and end up throwing it away. At some point I'm sure we've all had a feeling that we just want to throw all our little things out and leave it all behind us. This can lead to allot of money wasted and sad feelings if/when the desires for these things return. Some people do 'grow out of' this chapter in their life, but allot of us dont. If you start to feel overwhelmed or burnt out, its okay to pack your stuff away for a while, but I'd avoid throwing things out. When I moved I got rid of allot of my onesies and I regret it bigtime.

I know you posted this a WHILE ago but I was hunting around old topics for this exact sort of thing! just want to say I'm glad you brought up the binge/purge cycle. It's something I'm currently grappling with and it really sucks. I got rid of a lot of my little stuff a while ago since I thought I didn't need it anymore and I thought I'd be living with someone else soon. Safe to say, both of those fell through. And now I'm left wishing with all my heart I still had my onesie and bottle and all the things that made me so so happy before. I'm glad to at least know I'm not the only one who deals with that annoying back and forth hahah