My partner doesnt like ddlg

[Jiya]

Ever since I started questioning myself to be a little, I always denied it, and tried my best to hide it. The more I hid it the more on surface it got. It was mainly because I (no kink shaming, it is fine and very cute) im not into age regression. Now I DO act childish, more than my age, but.. i dont know. Remember I am VERY new to accepting and exploring and have no clue. 
So we once talked about me, me and my master (also my boyfriend) about this, and he has very negative feelings about it, and it doesnt like some of the childish stuff I do like most people, and it hurts. I wanted to explore this with him... you know? I sent very subtle signs but i never came out as a little to him and from how he acts, I KNOW he would absolutely not like it, and it hurts... I dont know what to do... 

[Erasmeus71]

Then I question whether he is a gentlemen or not? You see I grew up with the old fashion you open the door for lady. Close the door for the lady. Buckle the lady her in. Hold her hand. As you are the protector. In a lot of ways that is exactly the same as DDLG. 

[coralie]

I agree with everything said above. 

Also, I think a direct conversation is best as you know where you both stand and there could be things he may be willing to do. I get it is disappointing especially if this is something you really want but I always find it best to put yourself in their shoes. For example, if you found out your partner had a kink that for you was a hard limit what would you want them to do? Would you be ok with them exploring that with someone else even if it is just platonically? Would you try and see if there were parts of it that you did feel comfortable doing or would you just be upfront about it having no room in your relationship and accept the fact or realize you aren't compatible in the long run? 

 

[beanbean]

You can't force people to be what there not . you can talk to about it with him but it sounds like he is not about it .

 

[Pinkie69]

difficult situation 4 sure. i wish i had advice different to what other people have already said. but i don't. i think the advice already given is great advice. 

[Guest bubudabu]

19 hours ago, J_111 said:

and it doesnt like some of the childish stuff I do like most people, and it hurts. I wanted to explore this with him... you know? I sent very subtle signs but i never came out as a little to him and from how he acts, I KNOW he would absolutely not like it, and it hurts... I dont know what to do... 

I'm so sorry that you're really struggling right now.. it sounds like what he did hurt you a lot, and you didn't deserve to feel that way. I'm not sure why he doesn't like the childlike behavior you do, it might be good to try to have an open conversation about this with him.. even though you think he would absolutely not like it, maybe you both can find some compromises that would be good for each other? i mean he is your boyfriend right, so i think you can try to open up more and have a direct convo with him.. 

[Little kaiya]

You can't make someone be something they aren't. Certainly it hurts when someone you love isn't interested in something important to you but as an adult you will have your desires and they will have theirs.

Imagine it from their side for a moment. What if they had a kink, fetish or lifestyle interest that you weren't into to yourself. It wouldn't be fair if they pressured you to be involved and the same goes the other way.

You have a tough decision to make, do you want to live having to hide this part of who you are or are you willing to go find someone with whom you are more compatible. It isn't easy to think about certainly but you both need to have who you are respected.

Edited May 4, 2023 by Little kaiya

[Vampiress]

I'm sorry, it sucks that he doesn't seem to share your interest in DD/lg, but it is not wrong of him to have different wants. You might want to try talking to him to see if he has any incorrect and negative associations with DD/lg that maybe you can explain away with some education. Aside from that, you will either have to be little on your own without his involvement, or part ways due to fundamental differences. It's not ideal, but you have to make the healthy choice for yourself and for him.

[Jiya]

Omg- This was my first interaction with this community and my eyes are watery with now nice you guys are!! Thank you so much for your support really, and I really appreciate it!
Also, I told him!! He is like he is completely okey with it but you see... I- I kinda panicked and told him I dont want to dynamic to change since he isnt into it and he said yeah of course its fine as long you dont want our dynamic to change. I kinda got the answer though and lowkey relieved I didnt tell him I wanted to explore with him

[Punographer]

Its hard telling people the truth about how we truly feel. It takes bravery and sometimes hurts the relationships we have but in the long run it pays off. 

Also know its okay to grow and sometimes apart of growth is leaving behind the people who dont wanna come along for the ride. Keep your light inside shining!

[Erasmeus71]

I know we mention DDLG in here a lot. However I am one that does go into the rooms looking for ABDL littles. You see the one I was going to marry was a little of 3. Now depending on one what one considers to be how fast you get out of a diaper so it is questionable. I am hypersensitive to moister and got out of the diaper right very early. Could not stand being wet. Others prefer being wet and the fluffiness of the diaper.

Edited May 24, 2023 by Erasmeus71

[PrincessBinny]

I may have a different answer for this but it's also basically the same I can just empathize differently. because I'm in the same situation.

Of course you can't make him interested but I definitely understand the more you hide the more it comes to the surface and I've been struggling as well.

I find the only thing that is helping is hard acceptance. I've tried telling him that part of me is just so disappointed because the emotional load is making me feel distant but he responds pretty poorly.

I wondered why it was so hard to cover up and pacify a kink but I believe if we are trying to hide it and it's still bubbling out it's a need and little space may be part of who we are.

We all need at least acceptance from our person, I think. It depends on what you can do without.

I've been bringing out my little stuff while he's at work and that's helped a little.

 

I hope everything works our for you 🙏 ❤️ 

[Winnie89]

This is all so very new to me. I came across DDLg through these books I randomly stumbled across. Devoured an entire series in a week and can't get enough. I've been reading different topics in the forum as well. I relate to being a Little for sure. When I brought this up to my husband, he laughed. So I deflected to get away from the conversation. He's vanilla to put it lightly. I'm too scared to bring it up but since i brought it up to him, I've been feeling more and more sad about it. I've never explored being a little. I don't know how to for one. I don't get time to myself, ever. I'm either working or being dragged into a million different directions by my family.

I hope things are working out for you.

[Jiya]

Hiii! Its been MONTHS since this post and I have updates. So the thing is, its NOT how it is. He is not a CG, no but isnt against me going to my little space, as a matter of fact is likes how safe i feel around him which is nice. I am so happy right now. We have our ups and downs but Im glad we got through it