What is YOUR way?

[thelasteiko]

I have been lurking around the forum for a few months now, trying to learn about DDlg/CGl and understand how people practice it. I know that it is what you want to make of it, and it is different for everyone. I would like some examples though, to know what to expect. These questions have all built up in my mind so forgive me for the dump.

For those who don't mind sharing their thoughts, how do you engage in it?

If you have a partner, do you schedule regular scenes, like date night? Do you stay in your roles all the time, some of the time? Does it depend on the situation or mood?

What types of activities do you do? Or is that too personal?

How do you decide what to do? Do you plan a scenario ahead of time or just do what feels natural as it comes? Do you decide together or does one partner plan everything?

As a little, I make time to do little things, even without a CG. If you don't have a partner, are there things you do to feel engaged with CGl? Do CGs without littles 'practice' being a CG?

🙇‍♀️ Thank you for taking the time to read. Please forgive me for my ignorance and let me know if any of these questions cross any lines.

[Little kaiya]

For my Daddy and I it's a very organic thing rather than something scheduled or planned. We don't do set scenarios because for us it would feel unnatural or scripted versus an expression of our love. As for roles that doesn't really describe our relationship. He's a Daddy at His core and I'm a little, that's just who we are versus them being roles that we're playing.

As for activities that spans a lit of things. Outings together, bath time, story time, cuddles, bottle feedings, stuffie snuggles, cuddles by the fire, watching cartoons together and pretty much anything that feels right to us at the time.

I have a Daddy myself and honestly would feel a bit weird doing little things on my own. Some littles only solo play and others don't.

[Sloth Fairy]

It's not a role or scene for me. It's our relationship. I'm submissive and He's dominant; I'm a little and he's Daddy at all times. Like Little Kaiya said, it's more organic. I don't consider my little side to be role-playing so much as it's just a carefree version of myself. Or it's me at the core of who I am when I'm able to let go of adult concerns. Sometimes I find it harder to get into littlespace because of life stresses and sort of get stuck in adult mode. Having a daddy certainly helps put me into littlespace more easily, but before I  would try to take time for myself and do things I enjoy in llittlespace. I would do a lot for self care setting some goals for myself. 

And don't worry,  it's good to ask questions. I had a lot of questions in the beginning of discovering ddlg and exploring littlespace. 

Edited April 13, 2023 by Sloth Fairy

[hismiddlegirl]

I am a middle 24/7... I dont have a Daddy, I have a Mister. Our dynamic is more like the Lol**a book, he is not my submissive but I pretty much have him wrapped around my little finger and can get what I want. It usually is me that sets the tone for our playtime. If I feel like a schoolgirl, I get dressed in my uniform and he takes it from there. I am not a submissive in any form, but he knows I am a masochist and into CNC, so he will force me into things I am resisting, but I dont submit. Just because he is making me do it doesn't mean I am not fighting it, lol. It just depends on the relationship you have and you definitely have to be open with your partner and make sure they are aware of your hard limits.  I am not the only one that initiates tho, when he comes up behind me when I am washing dishes and growls in my ear, "Hey, llittle girl" I just melt....

[Punographer]

So this might just be the most unconventional response out there but here it is. My partner and I aren't in a ddlg relationship but a lot of what we do has a very very strong care giver and care recipient relationship. I like to think of it as us not needing labels to define how we want to behave and just naturally explore our interests. We communicate really well and are open about the things we want. For instance, being called daddy really creeps him out. So I don't call him that unless, I'm making a joke and I want him to cringe haha. At the beginning of our relationship, he knew identified as a little and wanted to meet my needs. As time went on, he naturally learned the things I love and vice versa. We're here just doing our thing without labeling it.

[gemmy]

I think with most BDSM lifestyles (I know there is some debate about how CGL fits into kink, but that's for another post lol), there's a lot of flexibility. It's pretty à la carte in that you can decide what fits under your CGL umbrella/how you relate to the roles and community.

My experience is pretty fluid and nothing is ever planned. This is just how I am as person. My Daddy and I also live together, so it's a built-in aspect of our daily life. With online dynamics and relationships in general you have to be more intentional about what you do/how you spend your time, so I could see scheduling scenes and dates coming into play there. I am also very fortunate to have some close friends that take on a babysitter role.

I think it's great you make time to be little by yourself. It's important and helps you maintain independence in your role.