feeling replaced

[honeybee7]

I think my irl bff is replacing me with someone else  she and i have known each other for a bit over a month and she would text me call me all the time come over at 2 am to hang out, we were such good friends. she even took me across the state at last minute notice cause she wanted to help me… but ever since she got a new job she has a new best friend and idk what to do  i thought i finally had a girl best friend who i could spend time with when my D and i aren’t, but now it kind of feels like her attention is shifted to her new best friend… it hurts too because they’re getting rly close and it was like a 180 overnight… i posted here because its difficult to share this but she was the only one of my irl friends who knew about my lifestyle in ddlg. i worry that now that she has a vanilla friend she’s going to think of me as weird, especially since she also knows someone who’s writing a book slandering the ddlg community. my friend doesn’t express any kind of disgust or anything like that— rather, she disagrees with the writer of the book. but i worry that now that she has a new best friend who’s not a little, she’s going to get rid of me entirely

 

update:

i just wanted to say a big big thank you to each and every one of u who responded to my post! it means so much to me and while i don’t have much to say by way of updates on circumstances, i did want to share with you all that i really appreciate and feel so comforted by your kind words and advice 💜 i talked to my D about it and he echoed many of the same sentiments  i’ve never felt such a strong sense of fellowship support and warmth before but i’m so grateful that it’s within this amazing community :3

glitter n hugs!!

- Bee

Edited March 13, 2023 by honeybee7
minor update

[tinysunni]

im so sorry >.< ive had a terrible situation like that, if they leave you, they arent your true friend, tru friends stay forever, im here if u need me ❤️

[BabyKokomi]

I am so sowwi to hear that.. the thing is if they really care about you, they wouldn't look at you in a different way just cuz of the lifestyle choice

if they do start doing that I  think you should reconsider if they really deserve to stay in your life

So, i say let her adjust  to her new work place and treat and talk with her indifferently.  She will realise you are there for her eventually when they workplace start becoming a norm for her and maybe invite her over for a meal or so she can vent about her work place 😉 ..maybe tell her u were missing her a lot.. everything will eventually turnout okaY?

Hehe..  hope this helps ~

We are here for u :3

 

[Cebakes]

Sorry you are experiencing this.  Have you shared your feelings on this with your daddy? I would assume he could provide some guidance to you on this.   While you have known her for a month, that is not a very long time to know someone.  I’m sure she is very busy and you may need to let her settle in with her new job.  Hopefully, you guys are on the same page as where your friendship is, but you may need to be prepared for her, not being one of your bffs.  

One of the things I was pretty good at when I worked, was noticing changes in peoples patterns of communications,  Emails, calls, frequency, etc…Generally something had changed to cause this, and it wasn’t positive.  It feels like you are sensing something is off.  
 

I don’t see anything wrong with letting her know that you miss not seeing her as much.   Is there any chance that what you are looking for in a friend or bff does not line up with what she is looking for?
 

 

 

 

[beanbean]

Well sometimes new friendships our all the Jazz and they will fizzle out . Also maybe your friends way of trying to make the new job easier to adjust . A month not that long just give her sometime and see.  if she values your friendship I am sure she will call you. Soon 

[MysticSand]

I agree with GayKitten above. It's an amazing feeling to meet someone and hit it off really well only to lose that kind of quick and intense connection a bit later. Fill your time with other things for now; the friendship will continue on and hopefully pick up again later. As humans we always have this ebb and flow and having a new job means reshifting some things in her life. Keep yourself available as a presence for her, but don't put your own life on hold.

[BrassyBabyGirl]

I was like uhh who takes the time to write a book slandering ddlg? But I digress lol. I have had a bff for over 25 years. It ebbs and flows. There are different stages and needs at different times. So I am echoing others in saying give it time....it takes time...and to talk it out. There have been times me and my bff stopped talking for months out of anger only to find we assumed what the other felt...had we just talked we could have resolved it.