Why???

[Little kaiya]

In addition to being a DDlg couple, my Daddy and I are also a D/s couple and an ABDL couple. We recently got yet another email from someone on another website we belong to wanting to be friends.

Daddy and I love making friends but when the message comes from a profile less than 1 hour old, the person hasn't made ANY intro of any kind and their message is, "Hey, how are you" with two unsolicited and unwanred crotch pictures . . . . Just what the heck??

Are my Daddy and I old fashio ed? Is this really an acceptable way to reach out to someone you've never even talked to at all?

We get there are people desperate for friends, any friend, but honestly these kinds of approaches are just, to us, creepy. We have NO information about you or ideas of ANY commonalities other than, since you are part of a kink site, that we probably share a broad kink.

Uggghhh, it is so frustrating!!

[beanbean]

yeah lots of people just come off as desperate a lot and its just sad tbh . you guys are right to be a little creeped out by it to be honest. people just want everything now sadly no time to get to know anyone just go right away and just trusting some one to trust  stranger is just crazy.plus if you have nothing on your profile that just raises to many red flags with me .i agree with you guys

[DaddysMonkey]

You’re not alone in this. 

Behavior like that towards myself , my caregivers , even just seeing it openly on the forum or by proxy , it grosses me the fuck out. 
 

Desperation is a stinky cologne. 
 

As friendly as I try to be I feel like I do a decent job of coming off mean / aggressive enough for people to very rarely ever approach me like this anymore. 
 

It seems like a lot of people just don’t have basic communication skills these days , and lack the simple getting to know you phase footing. It’s pretty easy to just be like , “Hey , do you like video games ? What kind of food do you guys enjoy ? Are you interested in making friends right now ? “ 

Sending crotch pics like that immediately ? Fucking vomit dude. That type of shit makes me enraged. How do you know that person or couple doesn’t have rules in place that they are to not look at porn or things that are NSFW without permission or consent from their partners ? It’s forcing people to feel cheated on in certain situations. 
 

People need to get their shit together , my god. 😓

[thelasteiko]

Stuff like that makes me nervous to take a chance on any new person.

[LeftyGuitar]

I rarely get messages like this, but it does happen every once in awhile. Its so weird. Its sad there's a lack of communication skills. Also, true some are desperate but that isn't good either.

[Vampiress]

You're not old-fashioned, it's just disgusting behavior that is becoming too common. Desperation and lack of respect is everywhere. People who lack any sense of etiquette or consideration for others. If someone flashed a random stranger in public they could get in trouble with the police and maybe even have to register as an offender, but people think they get away with whatever they want online because it's anonymous. Absolutely gross, and I hate it when stuff like that happens.

[LongTimeMe]

I've been around the planet for some time and have a broad range of experience from a life well lived, so I hope I am understanding of people, but this sort of thing just makes me angry.

I do get sick and tired of websites which produce automated messages from "members" just to keep your interest in their site and keep your click rates up. But unsolicited body part images, especially from the outset, has the smell of a desperate school kid trying to either get his/her first experience or a very creepy more mature person trying to set a trap.

This is a form of abuse which would not be tolerated in real life, but these low-life's think because they are "anonymous" they can get away with it.

Have you contacted the website owner and asked them to trace the IP address from which the message was generated? They might be able to gather information and report it to the authorities or at least block that address from their systems.

Edited December 24, 2022 by LongTimeMe

[PocketDove]

You're not old-fashioned. It's simply rude behavior. I would never walk into someone's house without knocking first. Obviously, the same thing applies to chats. 

I don't always think it comes from a place of desperation, but maybe entitlement or worse some people get off on violating social boundaries. If I HAD to play the devil's advocate I could say that some people assume what they like is what everyone else likes, but I think that's giving too much credit. Not sending explicit pictures before permission is consent 101. 

[Cebakes]

These people are no different than someone who exposes themselves in public. It turns them on and they get excited by shocking or upsetting people. They have no real interest in getting to know you.

[Guest Enchanted_MoonFlower]

Trust me when I say this, your not alone in this. I've got messages like that in the past. Not on this web site, but on another site when I was first opening up about DDLG. I just ended up blocking that person and putting up boundaries. It would frustrate me too. Just make sure you block that person and don't answer back to that person. They are clearly not interested in getting to know you, and being your friend. That behavior is unacceptable to me. 

[DollDirector]

strange thing to say , but in fact these people save you a lot of time . it's like sticking a warning on themselves , saying " just block me " !..