MissNMTX Posted November 27, 2022 Report Posted November 27, 2022 Wow! This is so different than what I imagined. When I first read your title I thought it referenced buying gifts for others ( maybe nieces and nephews) and I thought what a cute way to tap into your middle/little side. I'm super proud you ended it. I know how hard ending these kinds of dynamics can be. Especially when you're just learning. Be proud of both your little and adult selves. I'm so sorry you were manipulated. I've never really heard anything so outrageous. Asking for the money to buy a specific thing is "pay for this." Not "I'd love a birthday gift from my girl." As an EMT you are already not compensated in measure for what you deal with. I say you save your money and enjoy your vacations. Be well. 1
VSoftDaddyDomV Posted December 22, 2022 Report Posted December 22, 2022 (edited) I had a relationship with a Little who insisted I buy her a gift which I felt happy to do. We talked daily 5-10 hours a day and we were very close. It was a modest gift of $55... A pair of fancy panties but THEN, I never saw them again. We were long distance and I suspect they didn't fit and after that she asked for roses and like a fool I obliged. 40 Bucks on that. After that she would manipulate me emotionally and lie to get things and I was young then and didn't know better. She wanted the gifts to validate herself. And I spent around 1200-2000 in gifts! I even sent 400 cash for living expenses! Eventually I got wise and though lived together later the lies and the manipulation never ended. She played this on other people successfully so I would honestly say that buying people gifts and in particular on-line is a bad idea. Though it's your money and nobody can tell you what to do with it. I personally wouldn't show my affection that way. It made me real bitter toward them and they spend money foolishly. They more or less kept us in poverty buying food, clothing, etc... they couldn't afford above our living standard. Sounds as if you're being used though that's for you to decide what to do. Is it worth it to you? It doesn't look good for your relationship though. He will not change these habits...Spenders usually are addicted to it and you're going to be the victim if you're anything like my relationship...Wish I had said no "DAY 1" MAKE NO MISTAKE I loved he person a lot but they were real toxic. They were raised wrong...don't be a victim to it...a relationship should be 50/50 P.S. If there are any LAVISH promises and gifts in return that don't match watch out. Could be a Pathological liar and Narcissist. Or worse yet an entitled brat boy...All go together and these people will make you feel like the Princess of the Planet then if you disappoint them they'll make you feel like trash! I remember that well! But I learned EVENTUALLY. Edited December 22, 2022 by VSoftDaddyDomV 1
DaddysMonkey Posted December 23, 2022 Report Posted December 23, 2022 11 hours ago, ugabooga said: Next time even if someone doesn't have a lot of money if they can't scrape together $20 to pay for your meal on a date then they have no interest in being a good caregiver and you should move along. This struck me kind of funny. I personally don’t believe having money equates to being a good caregiver. A terrible man could buy me 50 meals and not be a good caregiver , a good man could be flat broke and feed me top ramen everyday and be the best caregiver on the planet. I get what you’re saying , stability is a key factor for life but…. I dunno. Just felt I should point that out. A good caregiver could be flat broke and catch my attention over some dillweed with a fat wallet. 1 1 1
Little kaiya Posted December 23, 2022 Report Posted December 23, 2022 When my Daddy and I first got together He was a full time student and not working whereas I was making just under six figures. Money wasn't at all what defined Him as a Daddy or made Him a great one. It was His heart, His actions and His being. I also get the concept of stability but money doesn't automatically equate to stability. 1
Vampiress Posted December 23, 2022 Report Posted December 23, 2022 We don't know what people are going through or what their situations are. Not having a lot of extra money does not mean they cannot be a good Caregiver. The only time money should be a huge red flag is if the person is financially abusive or has addiction problems that lead to massive money problems. 1 1
Kittenlikestocuddle Posted July 14, 2023 Report Posted July 14, 2023 I'm sorry but it sounds to me like you have a dusty on your hands trying to manipulate you with guilt for doing something that is an agreed part of the dynamic, and try to charge you for it?! But he doesn't have to buy you anything? That's a bunch of crap! I would do as Shadowrider says and RUN! I hate people who treat others like this! I mean why? It's absolutely unnecessary for you to make someone else's life miserable! 😡 I hope this never happens to you again. Real men don't manipulate women for their money.
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