How to recognize a Daddy Dom in the real world ?

[Suzette]

Hello, I am new to the forum. At the moment I don't participate much because I speak English badly (I use a translator) and I need to get my bearings.
But I have many questions and want to share with you.

I wonder in your opinion, how can one recognize a potential Daddy Dom in the real world? Who can also ignore each other. Because the DDLG even if more and more known, remains marginal and surrounded by prejudices.

I hope this question does not already exist on the forum

[Nymph]

Suzette, DDlg is not any different from any other relationship.

You will find a potential partner when you meet someone you are attracted to, share some interests and both are looking to get in a relationship.

I think a man who will respect that you like pink (or anything obviously girly or young for that matter, just an example) instead of a man who will look down on you and make you feel ashamed of anything close to your little space would be a good start.

I suggest you make friends here that speak your language to private message (all kinds, daddies, littles, mommies, etc.) and just see what do you like about the lifestyle and get to know your little side more.

Feel free to keep posting here using the translator, but it might be a bit more slow.

I would not rush into looking for a daddy until you know your little self a bit more.

[Suzette]

Thanks for your advices. Otherwise how do I know that a man will appreciate my little side and will want to practice DDLG? I could show this side of me only by knowing the person well and having confidence. It takes time and investment, which is why I would be very disappointed if I didn't find the right one. The ideal is to meet someone already present in the community, but there are fewer opportunities! I don't just want a Daddy, I'm also looking for "love", a life partner.

[Nymph]

You don't need to be obvious straight away! for example you could wear a bracelet with a small hello kitty charm (or something you like, but famous enough that it will be easily identified as something designed for younger ages). And that should hint them of your likes without feeling too exposed.

If you want someone already in this community, my main concern would being taken advantage of. A lot of guys target newbies, the language barrier might not let you see the red flags as clearly... The distance will often come up as an excuse to lead you on and make you wait, so I would choose someone who is already planning to visit or have the means to visit and meet in person soon. Someone who will be kind and respectful and is not expecting sex on the first meet.

That being said, remember you have the whole forum to back you up if something feels off and you can get many points of views here.

[Suzette]

Thanks again for your advice, and don't worry, I'm taking care of myself. Otherwise what you say, I already do it but even before knowing the DDLG xD I like to wear cute things like the Japanese, without it being costume. I mix adult and childish. But not too much now I know the DDLG, precisely because I don't want a stranger who knows it to identify me as little and judge me. I feel ashamed if it's too obvious. For me the DDLG is my secret garden.

[LoverEcho]

Outside of spaces specifically for meeting others in the BDSM community, there is no way to tell what role a person might be into just by looking at them. Any trait that you could apply to a Daddy Dom could also be applied to someone who is not a part of the community. This goes the same way with littles, just like how you mentioned you enjoyed cute things before you identified as a little. 

As much as the time sink and potential disappointment can be frustrating, you can only know what someone is into by talking to them. If you do not want to stick to meeting people via forums such as this, where you know that someone is part of the community before you start speaking, your only option is to talk to others in-person and ask them directly. 

[Nymph]

1 hour ago, Suzette said:

DDLG is my secret garden.

Aww for me too!! secret but not too hidden since I will mix a bit of kawaii fashion, in a more modest discrete way! it goes better with my personality anyways.

And that is one hint, someone who reacts positively to your likes means they either like the same things or find it endearing and don't judge you, that is the kind of people you want to have close to you so you can be your real self (this applies to anything really, not just being a little).

[Andriel_Isilien]

Get to know yourself and embrace what you like. 💖 Be happy being yourself! Then the right kind of people will be drawn to your style and energy, both friends and a potential partner. I don't know what secrets there are to spot a "Daddy dom in the wild" 😆 that would be really interesting to find out!! There are SO many differences from one Daddy/Mommy to the next because people are so unique in their own ways. It really comes down to each person. Keep making friends, exploring your interests, and learn as you go.

I really like the advice given in this thread in being yourself so that you can keep the right kind of people around who care about you. I would say start there and then bring up these topics of interest like Ddlg with someone who already clicks with you as a person. That sounds more natural and has a great foundation of friendship already to fall back on. To me I like this better as opposed to searching for a Daddy first and then trying to work out differences. Although, I'm sure there are some relationships that have worked out spectacularly this way. Anyone who have their own stories about this would be great to learn about. I'm only speaking from my own experience; that I prefer a connection outside of the dynamic before diving in.

[Suzette]

Thanks for your wise advice !

[Suzette]

For information, I met a French Daddy ! In the French community BDSM, I explained what I was looking for and I was contacted. He's a bit younger than me, so nothing to do with age. I hope it will work !  I specify that I exchanged with several potential Daddy before.

[Cebakes]

2 hours ago, Suzette said:

For information, I met a French Daddy ! In the French community BDSM, I explained what I was looking for and I was contacted. He's a bit younger than me, so nothing to do with age. I hope it will work !  I specify that I exchanged with several potential Daddy before.

BDSM websites/communities are a good place. Not perfect, but probably one of the better ways to meet DDLG people. It’s hard to put too much on vanilla dating sites.  This site is certainly a good place to try and meet people as well as learn more about the DDLG.

It’s great that you met someone. Make sure you don’t rush into anything. There are plenty of daddies out there.   Really make sure you know what you are looking for,  watch for red flags and don’t settle for less than you deserve. 

[Suzette]

44 minutes ago, Cebakes said:

BDSM websites/communities are a good place. Not perfect, but probably one of the better ways to meet DDLG people. It’s hard to put too much on vanilla dating sites.  This site is certainly a good place to try and meet people as well as learn more about the DDLG.

It’s great that you met someone. Make sure you don’t rush into anything. There are plenty of daddies out there.   Really make sure you know what you are looking for,  watch for red flags and don’t settle for less than you deserve. 

Yes ! Thx you for your advice. I try not to get too carried away, because he does not live in the same city as me. And he's still a student, but he's almost finished. He will be 24 years old. (I am 28 years old) But we match well, so I'm hopeful.