New to this

[Rainbow_Razor]

I'm new to this, and trying to learn more about myself and explore more things about myself. I have been drawn to this lifestyle for years but never have a safe place to try it. So here's to hoping I found one. 

[sweetblossom]

Welcome and we are glad to have you. I know it is scary at first when you take those first steps into something new and worry about everything that could go wrong or if your doing the right thing. I won't lie every place has it's creeps and some really great people. Thus far most that I have met within this lifestyle have been wonderful very open and willing to help me and guide me along my way and I for one am open to answer any questions you have or just be an ear to listen if you need ta talk as I am sure many others here are more then willing to do the same. 

[Rainbow_Razor]

3 minutes ago, sweetblossom said:

Welcome and we are glad to have you. I know it is scary at first when you take those first steps into something new and worry about everything that could go wrong or if your doing the right thing. I won't lie every place has it's creeps and some really great people. Thus far most that I have met within this lifestyle have been wonderful very open and willing to help me and guide me along my way and I for one am open to answer any questions you have or just be an ear to listen if you need ta talk as I am sure many others here are more then willing to do the same. 

Honestly I don't know where to start, my partner is not as open about ddlg and currently I am trying to feel out more information to make my partner and myself more understanding of what ddlg is. 

 

[sweetblossom]

Well you landed in a good place to start have you done much research into the DDLG or the CG/L lifestyle  CG/L stands for Caregiver/Little as some Daddy's are not Doms they are more Caregivers and not all littles are submissive so those titles may be confusing but there is no right or wrong in how you live this lifestyle it is what works for you and what fills both your needs and it may change and flow over time or it may stay the same. For every Daddy/Mommy and or little/middle or baby girl/boy depending on how they refer to themself is no the same and seek different things out of the relationship. So ask any questions you like am sure myself or anyone here would be more that happy to answer them for you. It can be a lot to wrap your head around and can understand you have many questions and have no idea where to start and what way to look to and I do know sometimes you may feel embarrassed to ask questions.  I am not here to judge and I am sure many here will agree this is a judge free zone ask anything you like we do our best to answer your questions or point you in the right direction for answers.

[Rainbow_Razor]

I have done some research but not a lot of it honestly. I find myself regressing when I am stressed out but I can't pinpoint an age range because it varies depending on how stressed out I am at the time. Sometimes I am just fiddling with a pop it or stuffie to  other times I'm chewing my lip and hugging the stuffie, I don't have a paci or anything like that but love when I go to Starbucks and get the sippy cup lid. I often zone out and things when I'm stressed out but normally I can control myself around others but I'm finding it harder to make sure I'm acting correctly, I'm between wanting someone to care for me to wanting to care for someone most days. In the normal bdsm world I'm a switch, so I can change at random, I'm also considered a brat. I found this out of wanting to explore this part of myself, my relationship is that of a submissive besides the bedroom there I'm a dominant. So like I said I'm a weird switch, but I prefer being submissive. Some people I get that instant submissive and some I wanna push them. Sorry I'm ranting, welcome to me being nervous 

[sweetblossom]

No worries and yeah I know those fidgets and that dropping into that comfort space some call it little space me until I found out about this world I called it my safe space where I could find somewhat of peace within my mind. The simple things like cuddling my stuffy or the sippy cup a friend of mine swears by her paci she says it gives her something to focus on sucking on it and he Daddy says it's the one thing that can calm her down when he can't that and her bunny. But that is the thing your little space is your freedom to let your brain relax and there is no set time of when or how you do it for now you use it as stress relief I did that at first now I take time during my day to use it as a centering and calming time. For me it could be setting down to color while hugging my stuffie or curling up with my stuffie and blankie while watching a cartoon or reading on of my fav childhood books. And don't be nervous about being who you are I know little who like being the caregiver outside the bedroom but like to be used in they are rare but I have met a girl that is your opposite. There is no wright or wrong answer to how you live this life it is how you feel save wanted and loved and what makes you happy and the same for the person you are with.

[Rainbow_Razor]

We had a bad experience with someone who was little who claimed to be little but they just wanted to do it all the time and not hold a job. That is where my partners hesitant at but I want to learn more and experience and explore this side of myself. Which is why I found this place. 

[sweetblossom]

Sorry that happened to you both and sadly there is people like that some Caregivers want that in a little others want an equal partner in the finances it just depends on the couple but it is never right for anyone to be used by a CG or a Little it can turn out badly and have what is happening now with your partner and them being worried of a repeat I understand where they are coming from. Unfortunately there is no easy way back from it other than time and the willingness to open yourself to allowing that part to accept that this is how they wish to live their life and have firm ground rules in place and each in the party knowing how it is going to be and what each party expects from the other. It is sad that sometimes it has to come down to that but if one or more parties have been hurt in the past having those ground rules and open communication cause prevent issues later on. When i started looking into this life much like you are right now I looked to see what I wanted and what I needed and I used that as my base to start the conversation.

[Rainbow_Razor]

2 hours ago, SeaBreezeBoy said:

Little ages can fluctuate and some people have multiple ages; that's totally fine! 

 

Some littles can be like that, but that isn't the standard or what's to be expected. The thing about BDSM is that it's something you tailor to your own life, and DDLG isn't excluded from that. Do you think maybe setting ground rules of what is and isn't ok when it comes to exploring this place (and making it clear you won't do anything that's a hard no for him) help?

And what sort of things do you want to explore with it? There's tons out there, so I'm sure you'll find what you need!

Sadly my partner thinks that is the standard after that experience even though we have been apart of the bdsm community for a long time. I'll have to look into setting rules and see if that helps, hadn't thought of that. I honestly just want to explore and learn more, I'm a pretty open person and love stuffies, coloring, watching cartoons and movies. I do have problems fidgeting and when I do seem to slip to a younger headspace I seem to fidget less. 

[Rainbow_Razor]

2 hours ago, sweetblossom said:

Sorry that happened to you both and sadly there is people like that some Caregivers want that in a little others want an equal partner in the finances it just depends on the couple but it is never right for anyone to be used by a CG or a Little it can turn out badly and have what is happening now with your partner and them being worried of a repeat I understand where they are coming from. Unfortunately there is no easy way back from it other than time and the willingness to open yourself to allowing that part to accept that this is how they wish to live their life and have firm ground rules in place and each in the party knowing how it is going to be and what each party expects from the other. It is sad that sometimes it has to come down to that but if one or more parties have been hurt in the past having those ground rules and open communication cause prevent issues later on. When i started looking into this life much like you are right now I looked to see what I wanted and what I needed and I used that as my base to start the conversation.

That's kinda why I want to learn more than just the few things I've seen and read, I want to be able to explain it and then be able to open that conversation.

[sweetblossom]

Yeah understandable ask any questions you have or what info you would like to find will do what I can to help you find it.

[ZenDaddy]

lol, I've been reading the threads of advice and I have to say Rainbow Razor, you have landed on perhaps the best and safest place you could hope to.  Welcome, and you are in SUCH a good place here.. and it's been my experience that, there are SOOOOOO many beautiful humans, Littles and Daddies here, that are always more than happy to listen, bounce ideas off of, or give advice that's as sound as can be.  Proud of you for making this leap and finding this Forum, and as a Daddy Dom I understand how your Daddy feels with that one bad experience.  It can sometimes be a bit to shake and let go of.  The main thing is, focus on YOU, and your grounding with the advice of others like you.. and hopefully your Daddy will find a place that compliments yours.  Hope that makes sense, and Happy your here!  🌹

[Rainbow_Razor]

13 hours ago, sweetblossom said:

Yeah understandable ask any questions you have or what info you would like to find will do what I can to help you find it.

Honestly I want to find out everything like I knew nothing because I'm not sure if what I know is correct. 

[Rainbow_Razor]

13 hours ago, SeaBreezeBoy said:

Well, best way to help them see is through testimonial. I'm sure there's a lot out there regarding how to balance littlespace with or at work or adulting from a google search or two, or a browse through the little space forum here! Maybe you could make a post here asking for testimonials of littles who also manage an adult life too!

Seconding this. I can try and help where I can

Maybe that will help, hadn't thought of that either honestly. I had kinda given up hope and tried to hide it away. 

[Rainbow_Razor]

9 hours ago, ZenDaddy said:

lol, I've been reading the threads of advice and I have to say Rainbow Razor, you have landed on perhaps the best and safest place you could hope to.  Welcome, and you are in SUCH a good place here.. and it's been my experience that, there are SOOOOOO many beautiful humans, Littles and Daddies here, that are always more than happy to listen, bounce ideas off of, or give advice that's as sound as can be.  Proud of you for making this leap and finding this Forum, and as a Daddy Dom I understand how your Daddy feels with that one bad experience.  It can sometimes be a bit to shake and let go of.  The main thing is, focus on YOU, and your grounding with the advice of others like you.. and hopefully your Daddy will find a place that compliments yours.  Hope that makes sense, and Happy your here!  🌹

Thank you so much and there are many beautiful humans in the world I just happened to get the short end of the stick and don't get to see that beautiful side of people most of the time. I've been looking at forums for a couple years now but never made an account never took that step because I was too scared and I'm finally in a place where I kind of want to explore it more. My partner's a woman and I'm a trans man so I've had a lot of changes in The last 5 years and I'm hoping that she accepts this side of me and doesn't really judge it based off of the other person but I'm hoping to change her mind. We have been in a polyamorous relationship before and I know it's something that she would look more into because I'm honestly wanting to find someone that could be a daddy Dom and can help her understand more of this lifestyle because from what I know about it it seems like a good space for me with how I am on a daily basis cuz there's times where I'm just don't want to be an adult I want to curl up with blankets and stuffed animals and just watch cartoons all day there are times where she has to tell me to eat and behave and I know it aggravates her which is why I want to find that extra person that can kind of be like a guiding hand.