Am I a little, middle, regular submissive or nothing?

[justalitnerdxx]

Edited January 23, 2022 by justalitnerdxx

[PapaGrayWolf]

A paci doesn't define you as a middle.  Nor does watching Scooby Do make you a middle.  It's your mind set.  And that mind set is subject to change within an hour.

 

When I had a little she would change.  We might wake in the morning and have fun fixing breakfast, adulting with laughter and teamwork.  Later, when she was in high school she would do homework and be a late teen.  Sharing a later Harry Potter movie might come in the later afternoon, and those movies were not designed for littles; so a middle then?  Before bed I might bathe her and she would most certainly be a little then.  And when we went to bed she might be any one of those from moment to the next, including an adult.

 

You are what you feel you are in the moment and what you feel is subject to change.  Enjoy yourself and how you feel. 

[D&Daddy]

It seems like you're putting too much emphasis on the labels that you've seen people use on this forum and perhaps elsewhere. I'd say that it seems like you're thinking of this backwards. You make the labels work for you rather than try to squeeze yourself into them. If someone calls themselves a little or a middle or whatever else it's because they've seen parts of it they identify with and they feel like that's a good way of expressing who they are. If that's not you then don't let it bother you wondering who 'you' are.

 

And like PapaGrayWolf said, these labels are so broad and they mean different things to different people. You can have someone who's super into Disney, the colour pink, glitter, pacis and sippies. You can also have someone who's into a goth ascthetic, horror and halloween. Both people call themselves little, and nothing about those preferences dictate if they are a little or not, it's about what they feel comfortable with and what makes them feel comfortable and happy.

 

So I recommend if you don't feel like any of these labels fit you then that's fine. Focus on what makes sense to you, who you are, what you want and that's what's really important.

[justalitnerdxx]

A paci doesn't define you as a middle.  Nor does watching Scooby Do make you a middle.  It's your mind set.  And that mind set is subject to change within an hour.

 

When I had a little she would change.  We might wake in the morning and have fun fixing breakfast, adulting with laughter and teamwork.  Later, when she was in high school she would do homework and be a late teen.  Sharing a later Harry Potter movie might come in the later afternoon, and those movies were not designed for littles; so a middle then?  Before bed I might bathe her and she would most certainly be a little then.  And when we went to bed she might be any one of those from moment to the next, including an adult.

 

You are what you feel you are in the moment and what you feel is subject to change.  Enjoy yourself and how you feel.

 

Thank you so much for sharing your story and guidance

[PapaGrayWolf]

Thank you so much for sharing your story and guidance

My pleasure, and I mean that sincerely.

[justalitnerdxx]

It seems like you're putting too much emphasis on the labels that you've seen people use on this forum and perhaps elsewhere. I'd say that it seems like you're thinking of this backwards. You make the labels work for you rather than try to squeeze yourself into them. If someone calls themselves a little or a middle or whatever else it's because they've seen parts of it they identify with and they feel like that's a good way of expressing who they are. If that's not you then don't let it bother you wondering who 'you' are.

 

And like PapaGrayWolf said, these labels are so broad and they mean different things to different people. You can have someone who's super into Disney, the colour pink, glitter, pacis and sippies. You can also have someone who's into a goth ascthetic, horror and halloween. Both people call themselves little, and nothing about those preferences dictate if they are a little or not, it's about what they feel comfortable with and what makes them feel comfortable and happy.

 

So I recommend if you don't feel like any of these labels fit you then that's fine. Focus on what makes sense to you, who you are, what you want and that's what's really important.

Thank you for your advice. You are right, I guess I do overly focus on labels and making myself fit them (or not fit them). I definitely need to step back and recenter!

[Guest Animetheemo]

Oof it looks like this one is a real struggle, honestly it's okay to not be apart of this group and still be childish. There are a lot of adults who aren't little but have little-like traits, it's quite normal for most adults to have a place in their heart for childish things or just be a little childish in general but that doesn't mean their a little/middle or anything in between. The main thing to focus on here is the mindset, if you feel like your younger then your a little and lots of littles have ranges of being little, for me I range from about 3-6 years old that's pretty big gap but it depends on how deep I am into the little space. I totally agree with the thing of the labels you do not need to fit a criteria to be a little, you do not need to love princesses and hate things that are scary because some littles hate princesses and fascinate over nostalgic scary movies like Coraline and the Corpse Bride, and some littles can like both creepy and cute I consider myself in that category and even dress in a style called 'Yami Kawaii'' which literally means creepy cute. You might want to go do some soul searching and find yourself, find who you are, and don't try to fit the labels onto yourself. Be ethnically you, you might not fit in this community and you might find a better one or maybe you totes do and just never realized it. We're all going through our own adventures.

[MissNMTX]

It sounds to me like all the exploring you're doing is very healthy. If it makes you feel better I discovered all of this when I was chronologically older than you. Sometimes, I think that makes things harder...its an expectations head game mostly.

I call myself a submissive, middle and a princess because those are the labels that "most of the time" fit best. However, labels are just that labels to try and put people in some sort of box when the truth is all of us are so many things labels will never work!

 

Keep learning, exploring, and asking questions. The right person/people will come along to help you grow.

 

Ps. My makeup sparkles, my shoes sparkle, and my phone case sparkles and they all get me compliments because I truly do love sparkles!

[justalitnerdxx]

Oof it looks like this one is a real struggle, honestly it's okay to not be apart of this group and still be childish. There are a lot of adults who aren't little but have little-like traits, it's quite normal for most adults to have a place in their heart for childish things or just be a little childish in general but that doesn't mean their a little/middle or anything in between. The main thing to focus on here is the mindset, if you feel like your younger then your a little and lots of littles have ranges of being little, for me I range from about 3-6 years old that's pretty big gap but it depends on how deep I am into the little space. I totally agree with the thing of the labels you do not need to fit a criteria to be a little, you do not need to love princesses and hate things that are scary because some littles hate princesses and fascinate over nostalgic scary movies like Coraline and the Corpse Bride, and some littles can like both creepy and cute I consider myself in that category and even dress in a style called 'Yami Kawaii'' which literally means creepy cute. You might want to go do some soul searching and find yourself, find who you are, and don't try to fit the labels onto yourself. Be ethnically you, you might not fit in this community and you might find a better one or maybe you totes do and just never realized it. We're all going through our own adventures.

Thank you for sharing your own experience! I do find it so hard to define because I do feel like I’m younger than my age, like an eternal school girl, but at the same time I don’t think I really shift my mindset at all and figure all people do feel connected to their younger past selves so me relating to being a perpetual student awkward shy child isn’t necessarily a sign I’m a little. Although I am drawn to the dynamic of having a Caregiver, a softer approach from someone else.

 

Your advice is resonating. I do need to spend time to focus on what my unique experience is, not compare to others, and trust the answers will come. Thank you for your help, hope you’re doing well

[justalitnerdxx]

It sounds to me like all the exploring you're doing is very healthy. If it makes you feel better I discovered all of this when I was chronologically older than you. Sometimes, I think that makes things harder...its an expectations head game mostly.

I call myself a submissive, middle and a princess because those are the labels that "most of the time" fit best. However, labels are just that labels to try and put people in some sort of box when the truth is all of us are so many things labels will never work!

 

Keep learning, exploring, and asking questions. The right person/people will come along to help you grow.

 

Ps. My makeup sparkles, my shoes sparkle, and my phone case sparkles and they all get me compliments because I truly do love sparkles!

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m glad to hear you’re understanding and accepting of yourself. Sparkles..ooh can’t beat them right?!