Question for Caretakers

[_Curious_Mind_]

I feel silly having to ask it.. Daddy said something today I am trying to understand. "He supports and encourages things that I want to do to better myself or that make me happy, even if they seem silly to him." The above is true, but I don't know why it hurt my feelings. I guess my question is, do other Bigs see some of the stuff their littles do as silly? Not in the cute goofy way. But silly as in ridiculous.? I could be over thinking it, but it really hit me wrong this morning. Heck I'm in tears writing this and I don't even know why it is I'm crying.

[D&Daddy]

That is a very broad question, it very much depends. Personally, to give an example, if I had a little that was into astrology or crystals or something like that I'd think it was silly simply because I think the subject itself is silly, but if it made her happy and it's not hurting her then I'm certainly not going to stop her. That might be what your daddy meant by it, there may be something you enjoy that he might not think works but he understands that you like it and you feel it helps you and therefore he wants to encourage you to do what makes you happy.

[SmolAetherr]

i mean you cant reasonably expect your partner to take everything you do/wanna do seriously but you do have his support, and you quite clearly have his support it seems

 

and  we need to separate ddlg with this because this comes down to supporting the person you love its fundamental to a relationship like trust and good communication

Edited January 20, 2022 by SmolAetherr

[Little kaiya]

I know some of the things I do are ridiculous which makes the fact my Daddy still supports me in doing them all the more special.

[Alaskan Daddy]

as a daddy I accept everything about who my little is inside her heart. Some of things she does are very cute, and those things are what makes her who she is. Those cute things she does makes me smile inside my heart.  I am sure your daddy feels the same way. I am sure he smiles whenever you do or say the cute silly things. Those are some of the things that makes you who you are. I am sure he loves you without conditions. The other thing I want to tell you is that many littles have the same thoughts you are having. I would suggest that you look at the actions of your daddy in the way he treats all of you, even when you feel you are being silly. If he makes you feel loved completely for who you are, even when you feel you are being silly then I would chalk your feelings as a time when you might be over thinking. Also tell your daddy the feelings you have shared with us. How he responds will tell you everything you need to know about him as your daddy. I hope my words help you in anyway.

[Punographer]

Sending big hugs!

 

Sometimes it can feel hurtful finding out that your partner doesn't like certain things about you or thing that you do. Now, take a different perspective. Have you ever mentored someone? Maybe a younger cousin or helped someone in school or at work? Did you ever think notice weird things that they do or aspire to be? For example, if one of your friends did the macarena every morning to manifest a good day, you'd probably think it was silly but you'd still respect and love them all the same. It might be silly to you but to that friend, it helps their mental health and aligns them for the day. 

 

Perhaps this is what your Daddy means when he uses silly. He wants you to be authentic to you and not what he thinks will make you happy and healthy. My 2 cents but I encourage to you talk to your Daddy about this, as he is the person that can accurately answer your question. Talking through these things can be super helpful. Good luck and feel better! <3

[Guest Teasing Tink]

I can understand why that hurt your feelings. The word "silly" tends to have a negative connotation in that context of not being treated with respect or taken seriously. Sort of like a condescending tone which can cause someone to feel belittled (no pun intended) or invalidated. However, people don't always communicate effectively, in that sometimes we choose the wrong words to convey a message whether positive or negative. Your best bet is just asking him to clarify how he meant the word "silly" and that you don't want it to hurt your feelings, but you're having a hard time not getting offended by it. We all have different words maps at the end of the day. He could have very well meant it in a positive/neutral way, or just used the wrong word, you know? To me, it sounds like he was aiming for a positive message, but it fell flat due to the wording. But really, only he can tell you the truth of the matter. Misunderstandings through language happen all the time. Talk it out. It's 100% not silly to feel the way you do.

 

Edit: Oh, and sorry I'm not a caretaker, I'm just a little passing through lol. I didn't realize the question was only for caretakers until after I posted even though that's the literal title of the thread *facepalm* lol.

Edited January 20, 2022 by Teasing Tink

[_Curious_Mind_]

[Punographer]