Have you ever lost your littlespace or little self for a long time ?

[Caregiverninja]

Hi. I am new here. I am asking this question for my little.

 

My little says that she can't feel her little self anymore. She says, it is like she has lost her littlespace completely. We have tried different things but, nothing has helped.

 

We are going to visit a kink aware therapist. My question is,

 

Have you experienced it ?

 

If you visited therapy, has therapy helped ?

 

How to handle it ?

 

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Thank you.

Edited July 9, 2021 by Caregiverninja

[Big_Bears_Princess]

Hi!

 

I can really relate, as I lost my little self for a while without even realizing it and I have only recently started to nurture it again. I'm thinking of seeing a kink friendly therapist for the same reason so that I can find the root cause of what's stopping me from getting into that headspace (I think it may be anxiety related). But until I can do that, I'm taking small steps by myself to at least start the process again. I'm not a therapist, but i can give personal advice from what has been working for me so far. First, take it slow and do things one step at a time. Don't just immediately force yourself into doing everything at once. For example, little me used to love wearing onesies and dressing very, well, "little". But since it has been so long since doing that it felt really weird at first to wear them again. So I started by just gradually introducing them again, like wearing them casually to bed (without the expectation to feel little) and slowly as I started to get used to just wearing them, only then have I started to do little things while wearing them. Sometimes I get into a littlespace and sometimes I dont. I think the less I worry about getting into a littlespace the more likely I am to actually get into it. If you don't get into the headspace, don't beat yourself up, just try to have fun anyway otherwise your anxiety will just get in the way. That's why it's helpful to find activities that are fun regardless of if you are feeling little. Another tip is to start tapping into your inner child. Because I was neglecting my little self I kinda stopped doing certain things, like baking cookies and colouring in. These aren't necessarily "little" things, these are just enjoyable whimsical adult things that may or may not help me get there, and I find that the more I look after my inner child the more my little self tends to come out. Another thing, Is your little independent in the sense that she can get into a littlespace on her own? One of the things that I think caused me to lose touch of my little self was that I stopped doing it on my own, and eventually I started to depend on my Daddy to always get me into that headspace. It got to the point where I was only ever little if my Daddy was around, so basically my little space no longer felt like "my" little space anymore.

 

I really hope this helps, sorry if it comes across as a bunch of rambling >.< Like i said, this is just my own personal experience and every little is different so it may or may not be relevant to your little xx

[Vampiress]

I think seeing a therapist is a great idea! In the meantime, maybe have her start thinking about certain things to help the therapist pinpoint what happened and why it happened. Questions like... is something preventing her from feeling little, like a mental block from stress? Does she feel insecure about it? Is there something she needs from you to get back from it that maybe she's having a hard time articulating? Did she simply grow out of it and found that was not a necessary part of her life anymore? It's entirely possible that it is a chapter of her life that is just going to be a part of the past now if it is something she no longer needs. Sometimes this lifestyle is a coping mechanism for people, therefore sometimes people may grow out of it if they no longer need that kind of coping. Whatever the reason I hope you two can figure it out and be supportive of each other. I know it's either going to be hard if she's struggling and needs help, or if she has decided she no longer needs this and you lose her as a little.

[Guest Leanne]

Yes, I definitely have times where I can't get into littlespace. For me it's directly related to adult life demands being overwhelming and resulting stress. It's hard to switch out to a little mindset when I'm on overload. It's the main reason for joining here. It's actually helped me being able to come on here and read other's experiences. Edited July 12, 2021 by Leanne

[Guest Princessblushie]

I also lost my little space for a year actually and it really impacted they way i deal with life … I think it was brought on by being on auto pilot and having my big life/ Adult life be to straining for me to step away from and still feel safe enough to regress . It’s always good to talk to someone but i think the relationship between you and your little should also be something you look at as something that can affect regression .

 

Wish you and your little all the health and happiness i hope they get their little side back soon .