Any other littles with a FIFO (fly in fly out) Daddy?

[Big_Bears_Princess]

Hullo   I was wondering if anyone could give me some advice.

 

My Daddy currently has a work roster where he works 2 weeks on and 1 week off. He has to fly out of my city for his work for two weeks straight, and then he flys back home for 1 week at home. The week he is home is always great, but once he leaves is when I tend to fall apart. I feel so detached from him due to the lack of contact. Long distance isn't necessarily the problem... it's just the overall lack of contact. I think I would cope if I heard from him throughout the day, but there is really bad reception at his camp (outback Australia), meaning I can sometimes go days without hearing from him. It's currently been three days of not hearing anything from him and it's getting really hard to cope. When he does have reception, he only has time for one 30 minute call a day because the rest of his time is spent eating sleeping and working. He starts work extremely early in the morning and finishes late at night, and when he is working he can't even send me a quick text throughout the day because of there being no reception in the outback. Only once he is back at camp will he *maybe* call me. But it's not a promise.

 

Are there any other littles out there with a FIFO Daddy? If so, does it get any easier? And what sort of things could you suggest to not feel so disconnected while he is away? It's literally 0 contact apart from that one phone call (which I rarely get) so I need ideas of how to feel like I'm connected to him without actually hearing from him  if that is even possible... I dunno. Please, if anyone has any words of comfort, pleaseeee help me!! 

 

So far, the only ways I can feel remotely connected to him is by wearing his clothes. Surely there are other ways I'm not thinking of?

 

 

 

[Guest Account deleted]

Ooooh.. Hey there Well, first of all.. Welcome on the forum and let me give you a big, big hug.. ♥

 

Thank you for reaching out, good job!! I understand, on feeling disconnected, and lost and needing comfort, that's totally normal..! It is VERY hard to be separated like that. I read your post yesterday and tried to think about it and I came up with a couple ideas that might maybe help you..? I am just sharing some thoughts... But the most important is that you understand you are not alone, and there are a lot of people here who are ready to encourage you and be good friends when your Daddy is away and you need a little bit of comfort.

 

Next time, you might want to try this. Sit with your daddy and take 14 little pieces of paper. Have fun brainstorming together about the activities you enjoy the best as a Little. Write one on each paper. Then give your Daddy 14 envelopes for Day 1 to Day 14. Let your daddy decide which activity he wants to put in which enveloppe. He can also add special notes for you, and maybe a little surprise here and there (a coupon, stickers, temporary tattoos, everything he can think of that will fit in your enveloppes). Once he left, you get to open an envelope a day. Take pictures or videos of the activity, keep track of how you felt when you open the enveloppe, complete a journal to show your Daddy when he comes back.

 

Try to make yourself an emergency comfort bag. Gather a few items that will bring you extra comfort and help you make feel connected to your Daddy. This bag is NOT meant to be open every day. It is for those emergencies when the distance becomes too overwhelming. The bag may contain: a video of your Daddy talking to you with extra soothing words that you enjoy, a letter from him, a USB key with happy songs that you both love, surprises that he bought for you like snacks, cute things, little toys etc. or a lovely storybook and maybe an MP3 of him reading the story to you..

 

And the last idea I came up with (I am a creative person so that one might sound a bit out there but I am sharing it nonetheless), create a Happy Tree. It's a big tree you make out of colored paper and you hang it on your wall. Cut out 14 big leaves. Every day, try to think about ONE good thing that happened and that made you smile. Write it down on your leaf and stick it on your tree. Every day you get to add one more leaf. Try to visualize yourself happily sharing all these thoughts with your Daddy when he comes back. Your Daddy already knows that you are sad and that you miss him. Sharing with him all the happy things that happened to you while he was gone is a great, thoughtful gift to give him to welcome him back home!

 

I am sending my best energy your way!

And big, big HUGS!

Xxxx - Bee

[MissNMTX]

These are wonderful and thoughtful ideas! I'm sure they'll be useful to so many here.

[Guest Account deleted]

These are wonderful and thoughtful ideas! I'm sure they'll be useful to so many here.

 

Thank you  very much! This is a very kind comment and it encourages me to keep on answering posts!

[Big_Bears_Princess]

Ooooh.. Hey there Well, first of all.. Welcome on the forum and let me give you a big, big hug.. ♥

 

Thank you for reaching out, good job!! I understand, on feeling disconnected, and lost and needing comfort, that's totally normal..! It is VERY hard to be separated like that. I read your post yesterday and tried to think about it and I came up with a couple ideas that might maybe help you..? I am just sharing some thoughts... But the most important is that you understand you are not alone, and there are a lot of people here who are ready to encourage you and be good friends when your Daddy is away and you need a little bit of comfort.

 

Next time, you might want to try this. Sit with your daddy and take 14 little pieces of paper. Have fun brainstorming together about the activities you enjoy the best as a Little. Write one on each paper. Then give your Daddy 14 envelopes for Day 1 to Day 14. Let your daddy decide which activity he wants to put in which enveloppe. He can also add special notes for you, and maybe a little surprise here and there (a coupon, stickers, temporary tattoos, everything he can think of that will fit in your enveloppes). Once he left, you get to open an envelope a day. Take pictures or videos of the activity, keep track of how you felt when you open the enveloppe, complete a journal to show your Daddy when he comes back.

 

Try to make yourself an emergency comfort bag. Gather a few items that will bring you extra comfort and help you make feel connected to your Daddy. This bag is NOT meant to be open every day. It is for those emergencies when the distance becomes too overwhelming. The bag may contain: a video of your Daddy talking to you with extra soothing words that you enjoy, a letter from him, a USB key with happy songs that you both love, surprises that he bought for you like snacks, cute things, little toys etc. or a lovely storybook and maybe an MP3 of him reading the story to you..

 

And the last idea I came up with (I am a creative person so that one might sound a bit out there but I am sharing it nonetheless), create a Happy Tree. It's a big tree you make out of colored paper and you hang it on your wall. Cut out 14 big leaves. Every day, try to think about ONE good thing that happened and that made you smile. Write it down on your leaf and stick it on your tree. Every day you get to add one more leaf. Try to visualize yourself happily sharing all these thoughts with your Daddy when he comes back. Your Daddy already knows that you are sad and that you miss him. Sharing with him all the happy things that happened to you while he was gone is a great, thoughtful gift to give him to welcome him back home!

 

I am sending my best energy your way!

And big, big HUGS!

Xxxx - Bee

 

Oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!! First off can I just say thankyou and that you are so freaking creative, these ideas are fantastic! <3 I can't express my gratitude right now. I just found out last night that he has been held back at work for another extra week, and woke up this morning feeling so so so blue. But then when I saw this message this morning it really cheered me up and helped me feel SOO much better!  I feel so full of hope now, and I really think that we will include these ideas! I'll send a screenshot of your reply to my Daddy and see what he thinks, but I can already say that I'm 99% sure he will also think it's all a bunch of fantastic ideas too!    xox

 

I'm also sending BIGGGG huggies your way too!

Ella xx

[Guest Account deleted]

Oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!! First off can I just say thankyou and that you are so freaking creative, these ideas are fantastic! <3 I can't express my gratitude right now. I just found out last night that he has been held back at work for another extra week, and woke up this morning feeling so so so blue. But then when I saw this message this morning it really cheered me up and helped me feel SOO much better!  I feel so full of hope now, and I really think that we will include these ideas! I'll send a screenshot of your reply to my Daddy and see what he thinks, but I can already say that I'm 99% sure he will also think it's all a bunch of fantastic ideas too!    xox

 

I'm also sending BIGGGG huggies your way too!

Ella xx

 

I am so happy my answer brought such a beautiful happy smile to your face, this is all I could wish for!!

 

Please don't hesitate to come back to your thread to share more about how things are going for you and your Daddy, I am looking forward to hearing about you!   

 

Thank you very much for this positive feedback,

Big big hugs for you too Ella,

Xxx - Bee