Dos/Don'ts for entering/leaving little space

[Guest DaddyPunk]

For littles that are not in little space 24/7,

What are some dos a caregiver can do to help you enter little space? Are there any don'ts that can cause you to enter little space?

Alternatively, what are some dos/don'ts that pull you out of little space?

 

[Guest Account deleted]

Hello.

 

That's a very interesting question, and one that shows that you care, so thank you.

Little Space is so different for each one of us, I can only answer from my point of view, which is very limited so I hope it won't be misleading…

 

To enter or to come out of Little Space is usually something Littles do naturally.. but it's a process.. I hope this well help:

 

What you can do: speak more gently and softly than usual, bring comforting things like a blankey, a sippy bottle, a teddy bear, a beautiful illustrated book that you can read together, a gentle kiss on the forehead, cute names especially when out of the blue can send me blushing straight to Little Space... if your Little is into coloring or crafts, ask her to show you what she did, engage a conversation on what she's planning to do next or on things she hasn't tried yet.. Lego? Train set? Jigsaw puzzles? Bring the cute stationery, stickers and glitters. Let her brain focus on things she wouldn't do otherwise as an adult. A bubble bath is nice too. Talk about the colors she likes.. What about pink bath toys, does she like them? Cuddle while shopping online together and scrolling to find a new coloring book, or new cute socks.. Have a nap together, rub her butt. Maybe music can help, it doesn't help me but I've heard it works well for others. I can only talk for myself but I will enter Little Space very easily when everything is quiet and I feel completely safe and assured of my partner's approval. If your Little is having a hard time, simply ask her how you can help.

 

What will NOT make me enter Little Space no matter how hard you try: when talked to as if I was the person in charge ("what do you want to do?"), being rushed, noise, cheery music or cartoons, themes that I just don't like even if a lot other Littles enjoy them (dragons, fairies, robots...), food, books without pictures, trying to force me into Little Space when the "adult me" is stressed out, or trying to force me into Little Space for your own pleasure and comfort.

 

About getting out of Little Space now.. Again, I AM SPEAKING FOR MYSELF... Stay gentle and reassuring, speak softly.. Tell her YOU had a great time. She needs to know that everything is going to be ok on the other side. Don't wait the last minute. For example, it can take me up to 30 minutes to get out of  Little Space. Sit on a chair instead of the couch. progressively stop cuddling, put away the blankey, sippy bottle, teddy, pacifier etc.. Have a code.. like "it is soon going to be time to put your shoes back on", "it's soon going to be time to clean up" if you guys were arts and crafting or playing Snakes and Ladders.. Bring a grown up drink in a real glass or cup (tea, coffee, sparkling water..) slowly start speaking at a more normal pace, use vocabulary more appropriate for an adult, use the regular endearing names you use normally instead of the ones specific for Little Space. Bring a snack you wouldn't give to a little kid (peanuts, raisins etc... ), turn on the TV on a program that is easy but appropriate for adults (food channel, house makeover etc..) .. Ask questions that make her brain reconnect with the Big world (what time is it? Do we have any milk left? etc.) Again... If your Little is having a hard time, simply ask her how you can help.

 

Don'ts... Do not get impatient. Don't try to rush things because you've just realized you're running late, it's up to you to manage the time. Don't suddenly start packing everything away from her and talk to her as if she was 30 or 40 or whatever right away especially if it's to start talking right away about possibly stressful thing like work and responsibilities.

 

Please let me know if this is helping a little.. We are all so different.. This is what works for me.

[SmolAetherr]

things that put me in ummmnnn, petnames, cartoons chicken nuggets

 

 

things that take me out, asking me to make decisions or take charge (i can im a switch but i dont want to take control all the time yeesh)

[cloudcat]

Oh nooo.... I'm so sorry my answer didn't seem light hearted enough.. that sure doesn't make me feel too good about myself...    There were really 4 different important aspects to the question and I tried my best to answer them all as honestly as I could... And as I said, my point of view is very limited, I am new to the lifestyle and I was only speaking for myself..   Also you know.. English is not my first language so it's true that my answers sometimes do lack pink glitters and smiling rainbows but I will do better next time!! 

so, I don't really have anything to add regarding the topic question itself, but I just wanted to let you know that I very much appreciated reading your in-depth response! It's always super interesting to read other people's thoughts, and I wouldn't have been able to explain things half as eloquently as you did so thank you for sharing! love reading about other people's experiences, and what makes this forum so great is that so many people are willing to open up and give honest, genuine replies about themselves!

[Guest Account deleted]

so, I don't really have anything to add regarding the topic question itself, but I just wanted to let you know that I very much appreciated reading your in-depth response! It's always super interesting to read other people's thoughts, and I wouldn't have been able to explain things half as eloquently as you did so thank you for sharing! love reading about other people's experiences, and what makes this forum so great is that so many people are willing to open up and give honest, genuine replies about themselves!

 

Thank you for telling me this, indeed I was feeling a little embarrassed and your kind words reassured me a lot Oh! And I agree with you! I feel the same about reading other people's experiences, it is so interesting and sometimes very helpful too! You made me smile! Thanks!!