ThatGuyDryBones Posted July 18, 2015 Report Posted July 18, 2015 All of the information was really useful. Thanks guys.
Funfreeliving Posted July 21, 2015 Report Posted July 21, 2015 Really useful information here. Thanks guys.
NeoDaddy Posted August 19, 2015 Report Posted August 19, 2015 There is honestly soooo much advice to give. But I do not want to write a book. So the best things to go by is do not think if you are doing something right or wrong. There is no real right or wrong. Just go with the flow of whatever feelings you have. Every Daddy (caregiver) has a different style of how to be a Daddy or Mommy. No 2 are the same. Just like no 2 littles are the same. Then if you do end up doing something your little one does not like, they will most likely communicate it to you so you know for next time. Then over time the Daddy and little dynamic between you 2 will be almost seamless once you get a feel for each others Daddy and little personalities. This has put alot of my stress at ease. Thank you.
Guest Dorianjekyll Posted August 22, 2015 Report Posted August 22, 2015 Does anybody have any tips for someone who is fairly new to being a DD? I understand the full concept of being a daddy, just be nice to get some advice. thanks 1
Guest LaidBackDaddy Posted August 23, 2015 Report Posted August 23, 2015 Good word Littlest Bunny. Responsibility. So many take it in the sense of a chore, instead of the sense of cause. As in cause and effect. When you are responsible for a Little, you become a Cause in her life. For example, lets look at two scenarios: Scenario 1> The DD and the lg are hanging out at the DD's friends house. Everyone is having fun but something triggers the Little and she gets up suddenly and leaves the apartment to go outside. The DD stands up with a sigh "Be right back guys." His friends ask "Where you going?" DD replies as he rolls his eyes "She is in a mood, if I don't go talk to her it will only get worse, and then I won't get laid tonight. I got next game." *and he walks out in a bad mood to find the Little Scenario 2> It has been a long day. It started with an anxiety nightmare and then, the bad news in the morning about her work schedule being changed AGAIN, so that she will miss out on movie night with the Littles for the second week in a row. Then she burnt his lunch, not on purpose but she was just thinking about so many things. DD has been sweet all morning but he can tell it is only getting worse and now she is starting to shut down. He takes her by the hand and begins the ritual he knows she needs. A hug, brushing hair behind her ear. Soft words of love and encouragement. Then a bubble bath and getting her dressed in her comfy clothes. Finding the stuffie and blankie and then it is movie time on the couch. He gets her cookies and milk and laughs at her silly imitation of the prince charming in her movie. He finds her phone so she can send off a message to friends in which mentions what an awesome Daddy she has. and so on and so forth. That night when he tucks her in he realizes she has a smile on her face that has been there since the bubble bath and the DD thinks to himself.... "I am responsible for that smile. I caused her to find it again. She is so worth it." In the first scenario, the DD did his responsibility. Halfheartedly with an eye on what he got out of it. In the second scenario, the DD was responsible for helping the Little find her happiness again. Make no mistake, No one can make anyone else happy, but we sure can be a Cause, be responsible, for helping the Little find herself again. Bottom line. if you are in this for the naughty sexy times, you might be better off finding someone like minded. Nothing wrong with wanting the sexy times, but Littles are not the place where that is primary. Your heart has to be totally into. She has to be your everything. Being next to her as she cries is enough for a DD. Setting her straight with a punishment should have the effect of "This will hurt me a lot worse then it will hurt you." It is all about intention. 2
MiAcushla Posted August 24, 2015 Report Posted August 24, 2015 My advice would be to not assume that a little is a sexual being. This is a particular problem I am having. 3
littlewolfkitty Posted August 24, 2015 Report Posted August 24, 2015 How about being loyal! You know not searching for another little when you already have one! Not being a butt head and hurting your little!!!! 6
dd.simon.4lg Posted September 3, 2015 Report Posted September 3, 2015 Remi. Your blog is very interesting
BiSciT157t Posted September 4, 2015 Report Posted September 4, 2015 Starting off, I am very new to being a Daddy. I'm so glad I you d this site. Already I have been gotten so much good I formation, though I haven't had a chance to read all the links in this thread. Right now I only have two major concerns. First off is I do care for my little, she's amazing, I'm just scared of hurting her or not be I g a strong enough Daddy. We have talked extensively about things and she has given me her list of what is acceptable. I want to make sure I'm the best Daddy I can be for her. Is it normal to be worry about this or am I to soft? Second thing that I've been struggling with is my little likes to get in trouble. Problem is, having been picked on most my life and already being a father of three it takes quite a bit to press my buttons. I know she wants to get into trouble every once in awhile it's just hard for me to get upset. 2
MrBonesWildRide Posted September 4, 2015 Report Posted September 4, 2015 We have talked extensively about things and she has given me her list of what is acceptable. I want to make sure I'm the best Daddy I can be for her. Is it normal to be worry about this or am I to soft? You are absolutely not being too soft. You are worried about how well you can take care of your partner and that absolutely shows that you care about them! Feel free to voice those concerns directly with your little, I'm sure she can back you up and make you feel good as a Daddy! Second thing that I've been struggling with is my little likes to get in trouble. Problem is, having been picked on most my life and already being a father of three it takes quite a bit to press my buttons. I know she wants to get into trouble every once in awhile it's just hard for me to get upset. So what you're saying is that she wants you to show her you care? Perhaps you'd like to read a bit of other people's opinions on the subject in a thread I made about punishment: https://www.ddlgforum.com/topic/4173-punishment-necessary/- My opinion on the matter is not directly related to what you're talking about here, but the replies my be because some littles have expressed their opinion! 1
Guest ( ಡ ͜ ʖ ಡ ) MrGentle Posted September 4, 2015 Report Posted September 4, 2015 I'm going to try and simplify being a DD, at least, from my experiences. You know how you act when you're alone with a pet? Be like that with your little all the time. Firm but loving, goofy sometimes, you're in charge, shower it with affection, give it space sometimes. Hopefully that's not too over simplified. 2
cutie_patootie Posted September 5, 2015 Report Posted September 5, 2015 Just have a really stupid question (as usual for me)... being a lesbian, my search continues for a loving, caring and understanding Mommy. Are the same attributes listed here for Daddies applicable to Mommies as well? 1
MrBonesWildRide Posted September 5, 2015 Report Posted September 5, 2015 Just have a really stupid question (as usual for me)... being a lesbian, my search continues for a loving, caring and understanding Mommy. Are the same attributes listed here for Daddies applicable to Mommies as well? 100% applicable! They are the same thing, just with different identity. The role remains the same and therefore the idea is the same!
mrbilbio Posted October 9, 2015 Report Posted October 9, 2015 This section is awesome. I am so green being a Daddy that I do not know what my true fit will be. This place at least give me a start. A post thank you for all the hard work and sharing that everyone has placed on this site. I do not feel so alone anymore
Dom/in/Training Posted October 15, 2015 Report Posted October 15, 2015 I read through all of this and it helped quite a bit. I'm in a relationship with my little (I'm pretty new to ddlg), and the thing I have trouble with is sticking to my word with discipline and punishments. There's a sexual side to our relationship so we have some sexual discipline, but I find it hard to carry through because she's so cute all the time. So my problem is having the will to do what I say and be a Daddy that actually acts as one. I have the loving/caring side of it down, and I was hoping to get some advice from people who have experience or have had the same issue
Mortimos Posted November 2, 2015 Report Posted November 2, 2015 New daddy/dom here, my little introduced me to this lifestyle and I defiantly find it apealing. However my little has been acting very submissive and it seems like she is fishing to be punished. Can someone give me some advice on being dominant I want to make my little one happy. 1
parsonsba Posted November 3, 2015 Report Posted November 3, 2015 Hi everyone. Like most others I'm new to this world. My little is finding me lacking right now and is talking about multiple partners to take care of her bdsm needs. She has not even told me what needs those are nor will really discuss them. I do not like the thought of sharing anyone I'm in a relationship with, especially a romantic one (which ours supposedly is). Any advice would be helpful. Thanks
Michael Posted November 3, 2015 Report Posted November 3, 2015 Hi everyone. Like most others I'm new to this world. My little is finding me lacking right now and is talking about multiple partners to take care of her bdsm needs. She has not even told me what needs those are nor will really discuss them. I do not like the thought of sharing anyone I'm in a relationship with, especially a romantic one (which ours supposedly is). Any advice would be helpful. Thanks The problem is she doesn't respect you. You need to shut her down every time she talks of multiple partners. Make it clear that it's something that makes you uncomfortable. She should at least give you a chance to take care of her BDSM needs before she starts talking about multiple partners. Maybe she's assuming you won't understand her needs, but even so she should still discuss them with you. I suspect her "needs" here are actually the need for multiple partners though. 4
jakebyrum223 Posted November 12, 2015 Report Posted November 12, 2015 i have recently wanted to become a Daddy, simply because i have a very strong natural protectiveness, and ability to calm and sooth.. so i found my little on Fetlife.. a little over a month ago and i am very new to all of this but in a way not so much.... if that makes any sense at all? so my Question is how to keep a content and happy little.... like i know the obvious basics and such but like does anyone have any tips on like things i should look for or what not... idk if this is making any sense at all but like i said im VERY new to the DDLG life style but in the same sense its a part of who i am and it just feels natural.. thanks again for the opinions
A Bookish Baby Posted November 12, 2015 Report Posted November 12, 2015 Coming from a little: The two main things that has caused my past relationships to fail where a crumbling of communication and rushing. I am a very shy person in general, and my little is even shyer. In my failed DDlg relationships my dom would pressure me to call him Daddy and I couldn't do it. He would express disappointment in me, and not listen to my reasoning. (this is where the fail in communication comes in) Due to the pressure I would call him these things and do these things with him but my heart wasn't in it. This lead to resentment, bitter fights, and a sense of walking on egg shells. I don't blame my past doms totally, I could've left when I saw the first red flag. But I'm just saying, never pressure your little into things. Explore things slowly. Get a feel for it. Never hide anything from your little and your little should never hide things from you. Your partner should be your baby, your best friend, and your 'counsler'. Anyways! Some things my daddy does for me right now that make me all warm and happy and some tips: 1. Follows threw with punishment. Obviously I don't enjoy the punishment but it's good to know he cares. It's been two years and not once have I gotten any less spankings for stealing a cookie before dinner. The number is five by the way. 0.0 hehe.. 2. Take care if her big side. It can't be all about her little side, she has big needs as well. I'm assuming, unless she is a 24/7 little. 3. If you are long distance don't neglect those good morning texts, skype calls, and late night phone calls!! 4. Take care of her little side. Some things that my Daddy does are pat my tummy, pat my bottom, gently rock me and coo to me, watch me color, put my pictures and crafts all into a binder, tie my shoes, brush my hair, call me pet names, suggest outfits for the day, pick my panties, make me do chores, insist I take a nap, insist I eat fruits and veggies. It's the little things that count. Hehe pun sooo intended!! 5. Just love her like crazy. And don't forget to tell her. Over use it. Atleast twenty I love you's a day keeps the sadness away! 6. I CANT EVEN STRESS THIS ENOUGH OPEN COMMUNICATION AND TRUTHFULLNESS PLEASE OH MY GOODNESS! I hope you two have a fufilling life together I hope I could've helped. If you need ideas don't hesitate to ask. I've been threw two bad relationships and a awesome one I'm in now. We've lasted long distance, angry parents, angry friends, and cookies constantly stolen. <3 7
FitPapaBear Posted November 18, 2015 Report Posted November 18, 2015 Just checking if what I figured for now is okay. Everything you read about how to be a good D to your s is to be taken mainly as a basic guideline / pointer / option. Most important aspect of your D/s relationship should be flexibility / communication / understanding. Opinions are welcomed. 1
Guest TNDaddy Posted January 3, 2016 Report Posted January 3, 2016 Remember one key element. LOVE! Please love your little unconditionally!
Cowboy Posted January 5, 2016 Report Posted January 5, 2016 I'm a new Daddy in my relationship as far as is related to a Little. However, I've been in long-term relationships and understand the process befriending and discovering your lover. I've read some different websites about Ds and DDlg relationships, but I would like information that is more specific to nurturing the relationship that merely starting or salvaging one. 1. How can I better provide a safe environment (a place for her to feel comfortable in expressing her Little self) for my Little to discover her interests? She too is knew, and may not yet know how far she wants to take it for fear of rejection. And I want to give her assurance that she has liberty to be her true self - whomever that is. 2. How can I better probe my own true self, to know my limits, since I've never been here before? 3. I don't know if this topic is even permitted here, but I'll ask and find out. Can you make suggestions for a token gifts for my little? I mean, something that is specific to her Little while remaining classy and elegant. If this is way off topic or in the wrong place, please advise me and I'll correct it. I've never been so nervous, lol.
Guest Lilkittygirl Posted January 5, 2016 Report Posted January 5, 2016 New daddy/dom here, my little introduced me to this lifestyle and I defiantly find it apealing. However my little has been acting very submissive and it seems like she is fishing to be punished. Can someone give me some advice on being dominant I want to make my little one happy. This is probably too late but as a little who can be the same i say you need to get very dommy(I know not a word). Punish her, make her feel submissive. Sometimes a little wants to be dominated a bit more
angel74 Posted January 25, 2016 Report Posted January 25, 2016 so me and my girlfriend have been dating for about four months and she recently told me that she was into this, the problem is that i have never heard of this lifestyle until now and i just dont understand. i have read many pages and watched plenty of videos about this but its still difficult to understand. i am not very comfortable with it either, thats not saying that i dont love her any less but its still not something I'm comfortable with at all. i mean to me it feels like this would be a really one-sided relationship and as much as i love taking care of her i dont want to be the only one in the relationship thats a caregiver. she said that its okay and that i dont have to do anything if I'm uncomfortable but i want to make her happy, i want to make her feel safe, and comfortable with me. its just really hard to wrap my head around and i dont know what to do
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