Finding it hard to get into little space.

[Guest Unicorn_Flower]

Hi everyone, I'm sure this would've been asked before but I thought I'd ask here for advice. I'd like advice from other littles as well as caregivers.

 

I'd like to start by saying I have no problem going into little space by myself. However recently I've noticed finding it difficult to get into little space when skyping with other littles.

 

Little space is something that is very personal and intimate to me (I'm sure that's the same for every little). I've always assumed any difficulties I've had getting into little space with new caregivers is just me shielding myself, especially from strangers or people I didn't fully trust yet. And I'm not too worried about that, it's just who I am and I'm sure it's perfectly normal. However more recently I've struggled to go into little space with people I've known for over 3 years, and been in little space with both online and in person in the past. I'm finding it hard to work out why. Nothing has seemed to change recently (except the pandemic) to cause this.

 

Usually I'd get snuggled under my favourite blanket, surround myself with toys and stuffies and I'd immediately be dragged into little space but that's not working at the moment when I'm interacting with other people.

 

So I was wondering if anyone had some advice on other ways that may help me get over this sudden mental block and into little space. Thank you in advanced.

Edited February 9, 2021 by Unicorn_Flower

[maddycakes]

I think there are a few avenues to pursue here. 

 

1. You can talk to your little friends about this block and have them be active participants in helping you. I've found this particularly helpful in irl situations where I didn't know people really well, but I think it would work even better with old friends! Maybe they can make you little snackies, or (if you dont see them in person) they could help you in other ways like singing little songs to you or treating you like a smol or talking to you in baby talk, if that's your thing. 

 

2. You can get into littlespace on your own beforehand. You can try getting into that headspace 15-30 mins before you have to go to an event (whether online or in person) and then just keep that momentum going instead of trying to start it up when you are already in it.

 

3. I think it's really important to assess why you may be feeling this way. It seems from your post that you feel like this has come out of nowhere, but what is different in your life between now and the past when you were able to go into littlespace with these people? Were you in a relationship/are you in a new one? Were you in school/have you started a new school/job? Have you moved? Did you gain/lose roommates? What is different? Explore that, because sometimes even though they don't feel important, small things can be really influential. 

 

Hope this helps!

[Guest Unicorn_Flower]

I think there are a few avenues to pursue here. 

 

1. You can talk to your little friends about this block and have them be active participants in helping you. I've found this particularly helpful in irl situations where I didn't know people really well, but I think it would work even better with old friends! Maybe they can make you little snackies, or (if you dont see them in person) they could help you in other ways like singing little songs to you or treating you like a smol or talking to you in baby talk, if that's your thing. 

 

2. You can get into littlespace on your own beforehand. You can try getting into that headspace 15-30 mins before you have to go to an event (whether online or in person) and then just keep that momentum going instead of trying to start it up when you are already in it.

 

3. I think it's really important to assess why you may be feeling this way. It seems from your post that you feel like this has come out of nowhere, but what is different in your life between now and the past when you were able to go into littlespace with these people? Were you in a relationship/are you in a new one? Were you in school/have you started a new school/job? Have you moved? Did you gain/lose roommates? What is different? Explore that, because sometimes even though they don't feel important, small things can be really influential. 

 

Hope this helps!

Thank you for your advice. I'll take it on board and talk to my friends about if before we chat online again. I'll also try getting into little space ahead of time and seeing if that works. Your advice means a lot so thank you again.

 

I will have to really assess what brought this block on in the first place. On the surface, nothing has changed. However these things don't just happen out of the blue and I'll have to take some time thinking over it.

[StrngButSweetDD]

This is an interesting issue (though I'm sure it's not feeling that way).  Littlespace is a very personal place, as you noted, and there's a lot of things that can hold you back from being able to get there, trust in the others present being the primary obstacle.

 

It's a strange thing in a say for me to even offer advice on accessing, as I've not been there myself, being a DD!  But I've helped others find their way, and I've observed some patterns.

 

It could be external to you - has something changed with the group dynamic that is throwing you off?  Or it could be a stress, distraction, or preoccupation of your own. Is there a ritual that you follow that has been displaced?  Are you distracted, tired or dealing with adult things?

 

The initial entry in to little space is very delicate.  As a partner helping someone get there, I try to eliminate any distractions.  Even seeing herself in the mirror, the momentary thought that she looks old or silly, can ruin it.  I try to make things soothing, calming, loving and caring.  A measured walk down an emotional staircase, into the place she longs to be.

 

Hopefully you can troubleshoot a little bit and figure out.  Littlespace is wonderful and fulfilling and healing and I hope you find your way back to your friends!