hi, i was wondering if someone could help me please?

[chxr]

i’m a 22 year old little and i have a bit of a hard time accepting my “little ways” i feel a bit guilty because society tells us these ways that i love are for children (liking cartoons, nursery rhymes etc) i just feel a bit bad. i just want to accept myself and enjoy these things without worrying that. thank you for reading.

[Lollipox]

Humans are complicated creatures.

I think the stigma comes from the assumption that if you like childlike things then you are automatically an immature person. In this case "immature" referring to lacking a sense of adult responsibility, comprehension and life experience. And that something must be wrong if you haven't outgrown the fun childhood stuff.

 

It also depends on your culture and society.

 

In South Korea for example, it's more socially acceptable for women to like cutesy or cartoonish things. I'm unsure if the same holds true in Japan and other parts of the world. Maybe not baby bottles, pacifiers and baby things- but still cute things that other societies might consider too childish.

 

Kids things are often simplified to appeal to their needs as underdeveloped beings, with the intention of increasing their comprehensive skills, motor skills, ability to recognize different shapes/colours/numbers/letters and learn basic human skills. Then the stuff between is playful fodder for entertainment before they're allowed to be exposed to more adult content.

So for an adult to be interested in the aforementioned, it's seen as a step back. But realistically, it isn't accurate.

 

Besides, where's the fun in becoming an adult if you can't cater to the cutesy harmless things you're interested in?

There's definitely enjoyment in being an adult, being able to subscribe to things like Disney+, or buy toys, clothes and colouring books. ^^

 

Almost everyone has something they work towards. And it's okay if for you it's some of the things listed above, or more.

 

Tldr;

Some people like gardening, some people like cars. Liking childish things is equally harmless and you shouldn't beat yourself up about it.

[Vampiress]

I think it helps to make friends in the community. I think supporting each other and having a safe space to freely express ourselves can help a lot with accepting this about ourselves. Even though what we like may seem taboo to others, ultimately it isn't harming anyone... and more importantly, if it makes you happy, then who cares what anyone else thinks? Chances are, they are into things that other people would judge or dislike. We all have parts of ourselves that other people might not always understand, and that's okay. I, for one, would rather not live my life catering to the expectations and images of me that other people have created. I want to live my life for me and what makes me happy. Life just doesn't seem that great when you're too pre-occupied with pleasing others who don't seem concerned about making your happiness a priority. Though having friends in the community is a good place to start, you will have to eventually learn to accept this about yourself. Times where you doubt yourself may still come up, but just remind yourself that your happiness matters and you're not doing anyone any harm.

[babybunnyx97]

I feel bad about this too!! Like I come across people saying horrible things about DDlg online. They say we must be traumatized, and we romanticize abusive relationships and even compare it to pedophilia!!! It makes me feel really bad, like what is wrong with me?? Am I damaged or something? I don't know how to cope with this, feeling lonely and worthless, like I'm a pervert or something. I haven't told anyone in person that I'm a little, so not being able to talk about this with anyone makes it worse. At least we can discuss it here

[Kitten&Spice]

I honestly don’t see it as personally anyone’s business. I think that me being a little is something that should only be important to those in the community as well as my partner. It is a common misconception as to what DDlg really is as a whole but that is like anything else that people lack an understanding of. Anything that is uncommon will have ignorant people who will not approve of it. One great example is the furry community. There was tons of misconceptions about people who are on the community and all it was was a misunderstanding and lack of knowledge on it! I think if someone really cared they wouldn’t name call or throw false information. And simply put ignorance is not something I really care to listen to!

 

I think if you want to wear little clothes then all right to you! Of course there is always a limitation as to what you do in public you can always discreetly apply your little little space! Most people won’t pay no mind to it. And if anything they really don’t know the intentions behind you wearing pig tails! I think our culture has definitely came a long ways about things and that people are learning more and accepting communities like this more! But no matter where you go or what you do you will always find a Karen! Just know that their opinion doesn’t matter! And that you should live life the way that makes you happy!

[Lil-Pooh-Bear123]

Hi!!    I completely understand the feeling of guilt/shame that can hang over you and it definitely prevented me from accepting my little side for years. I have a very public job and I happen to live in a small town so behaving "little" is something that I try to keep under control in fear of appearing immature, unprofessional, etc. When I first acknowledged that this is who I am and something I wanted to explore on my own, it took a lot of redirecting the negative thoughts I had so that I could reach the level of comfort & happiness I wanted to have within myself and my little space. What really helped me was finally recognizing that the poor thoughts I had towards this wasn't something I developed on my own. I carried those negative feelings because of other peoples' unwanted and hurtful opinions - on a concept they had no understanding of! So whenever I wanted to do something little for myself and had those bad feelings, I told myself that this is my normal. This is how I want to experience happiness, love, and comfort. Everybody has something that is their "normal" whether that's riding bikes, building model airplanes, or collecting freaking monkey figurines. Surround yourself with people who are supportive (they don't need to know everything to support you!) and really practice taking that extra time to redirect your thoughts when you start to feel that way. I really hope that things start to feel easier for you!!  *fingers-crossed* 

[Vampiress]

I feel bad about this too!! Like I come across people saying horrible things about DDlg online. They say we must be traumatized, and we romanticize abusive relationships and even compare it to pedophilia!!! It makes me feel really bad, like what is wrong with me?? Am I damaged or something? I don't know how to cope with this, feeling lonely and worthless, like I'm a pervert or something. I haven't told anyone in person that I'm a little, so not being able to talk about this with anyone makes it worse. At least we can discuss it here

 

As a former DD/lg hater, I can honestly tell you that for many it's purely misconceptions, not understanding what it is at all, and not taking the initiative to learning anything about it. The moment I decided to finally be open minded and look more into it, I realized that I actually liked it and it wasn't bad at all. There's nothing wrong with you, these other people are generally just uninformed and it can be very hard to get them to be more receptive to learning about it.

[daddymind]

I've found that as I get older I care less and less what society thinks and a deeper understanding of myself, of the characteristics that have remained constant or grown stronger, become ever more important. I'm sure you will feel the same as time goes on. While I do think certain behaviours are probably best kept private, for various reasons, I see your right to be who you are as a fundamental part of the principle, "if it harms no one, do what you want". Hold this truth at the core of everything you do and you'll find accepting yourself easier.

 

As it happens, I think most people understand that principle, even though they might use ridicule as a means of undermining certain behaviours. But we have to accept that your right to be who you want to be is connected to their right to say what they want about it. Ultimately, they'll go back to their ways and you'll go back to yours.

[Guest Daddydesistyle1]

It’s normal to the way you are feeling. One of the reasons I love the DDlg, (I call it my family) and the reason is simple. You can be what your heart desires, you want to feel like baby at the age of 40 sure no problem if you want to act like a teen at the age of 21 you are most welcome. We don’t judge you, we are here with the same mind set to be with some one who loves the way we are.

[Newbie72]

I'm 48 straight female and want to be a little is that weird?

[Guest Daddydesistyle1]

I'm 48 straight female and want to be a little is that weird?

NO, my dear friend, I am happy to say there is no age. This is what I think people need more education on this subject. Being little is showing of your child like side which is pure there is no filter, and being daddy is being there to care for your little. You can be married but have a little (non sexual/sexual) or a daddy (sexual/non)

[Newbie72]

Thank you good to know. So exciting to me

[Newbie72]

Any advice I met a guy who wants to be my daddy

[babybunnyx97]

[Newbie72]

Maybe u could talk to your bf about being your daddy. Tell him how u feel. I don't think an online thing is cheating per se. Depends how serious u and your bf are. I am meeting a guy today for lunch and he wants to be my daddy. I've been interested in doing this for about 7 months but nervous.

[Little kaiya]

[Vampiress]

You should really communicate with your boyfriend and be open and honest. The only way to find out how he feels is by asking him directly. I'd hate for you to go for it and find out that he considers it cheating.

 

My Daddy/bf would 100% consider it cheating even if it was non-sexual, it'd still be like emotional cheating.

[babybunnyx97]

[babybunnyx97]

It is really going to depend on the relationship that you have with your boyfriend. Nobody here can make a ruling about whether it would be cheating or not as every relationship is unique. Talk to your boyfriend and find out.

As for a non sexual relationship, some littles and caregivers want that and others don't. For my Wife, Daddy and I, it would 100% be cheating if one of them went and found a nonsexual little or if I went and found a nonsexual caregiver. Cheating isn't always about physical actions it can be emotional as well.

This is just our perspective for our relationship, other people will certainly have other opinions.

Thank you! He doesn't know what DDlg is and when I hinted a bit about it he didn't seem to understand. It seems like he wouldn't like it, and I haven't told him everything because I'm scared he would judge me and hate me. I'm not sure if he would care if I had a non sexual long distance relationship with a Daddy ‍♀

[babybunnyx97]

You should really communicate with your boyfriend and be open and honest. The only way to find out how he feels is by asking him directly. I'd hate for you to go for it and find out that he considers it cheating.

 

My Daddy/bf would 100% consider it cheating even if it was non-sexual, it'd still be like emotional cheating.

Thank you! It's just he never heard of DDlg before, and he'll think it's weird so I don't know what to do. I'm slowly hinting at bdsm and ddlg a bit. Only the sex part I just feel like he could be open to some sex stuff before understanding everything else