Ageplay vs DDLG vs Agere vs ABDL?

[Bearly]

I know the general differences between different types of littles but I'm wondering if there are some spaces that are best to stay out of if you're into certain things? For example, I like innocent little stuff in general and am not sure if I should join agere groups on social media because I've heard it's often more about trauma-related medical regression rather than fun and games.

[Vampiress]

The impression I've gotten is that the communities that involve trauma and allows minors mostly don't want the littles that are into it sexually involved in their community (there is probably exceptions who don't mind), and some are very anti-DD/lg. I'd be careful interacting with them just because they might get offended, and you should avoid the minors entirely. They have made it a safe space for themselves in a different capacity, and I think that should be respected for sure. If you do interact with them just keep anything adult out of it.

[Bearly]

I can't find a SFW 18+ littles group on fb so either I join a group with minors or I don't join anything, which stinks. I am in one littlespace group but I avoid commenting on minors' posts. I mean, I'm not into any sexual stuff as far as little stuff, anyway. But one group I was looking at basically said "no DDLG, ABDL, CGL as those are kinks" and I don't feel that CGL (or ABDL?) are necessarily kink, especially since agere has caregivers and littles and that's what CGL is to my understanding. Edited September 13, 2020 by Bearly

[LittlePupRune]

I can't find a SFW 18+ littles group on fb so either I join a group with minors or I don't join anything, which stinks. I am in one littlespace group but I avoid commenting on minors' posts. I mean, I'm not into any sexual stuff as far as little stuff, anyway. But one group I was looking at basically said "no DDLG, ABDL, CGL as those are kinks" and I don't feel that CGL (or ABDL?) are necessarily kink, especially since agere has caregivers and littles and that's what CGL is to my understanding.

 

CGl is the umbrella term of caregiver/little that encompasses ddlg (which is a very specific type of cgl and I dislike using it as an umbrella as I am not an lg). CG/l can be sexual or nonsexual. Cg/l tends to describe a type of relationship style and potentially headspace for people. ABDL is slightly different but can involve aspects of cgl. Personally I don't know much about agere, so maybe they also use terms of cg/l, however the general understanding of cg/l is an umbrella term for dynamics like dd/lg, md/lg, md/lb, dd/lb, etc.

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

This is a really prickly topic, honestly. I completely understand the need and comfort obtained from medical or trauma-related age regression, but that group of people have hijacked words and phrases that aren't theirs. It makes their own community unsafe and places an undue stress on adult DDlg (and extended community) littles, sexual or not. Age regressors are typically individuals who can't control their age, and because of this they aren't able to consent to sexual activities. This is why age regression needs to be completely separate from the DDlg community. I'm a person who has age regressed in the past, and it isn't always cute and fun. It can be terrifying. My own regression was caused by trauma and it brings me back into a scary space. I wouldn't want anything sexual around me when that happens and I would not be able to consent.

 

Non-sexual littles who do it just because they enjoy it, aren't age regressors, they're into ageplay. BDSM and DDlg isn't just about sex. It perpetuates myths about BDSM that harm the community. There should be more non-sexual resources for non-sexual littles. There should be more help for littles in the DDlg community with trauma, mental illness, etc, but those resources are really only available for the regression community. We as a community need to fix that rather than join other communities that aren't right for us. Agere communities should exist, but it is not the kink community's responsibility to completely change their expression because a new group of people decided the word belongs to them or it offends them. Maybe this just hits me harder as a queer person, who is proud of that label. 

 

Another thing to remember is that agere involves minors, where as any safe kink community should not, regardless of their own sexual status as a little. My best advice is to not be involved in a regression community unless you are a person with trauma or some sort of other medical reason. <3

[Vampiress]

Part of why CG/l is considered a kink whether you're sexual or not about it is the power exchange dynamics that is typical in CG/l which is something the other groups aren't necessarily engaging in at all and age regress completely on their own.

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

Part of why CG/l is considered a kink whether you're sexual or not about it is the power exchange dynamics that is typical in CG/l which is something the other groups aren't necessarily engaging in at all and age regress completely on their own.

 

I agree, I didn't touch on that. I know that age regressors also have caregivers and identify regression as "little space" along with using Cg/l, which is potentially dangerous and incorrect.

I also don't know much about ABDL, but I do think they have similar dynamics to the greater DDlg community and can be sexual or non-sexual and that it is located very squarely under the BDSM umbrella.

[Bearly]

Thanks for your input. I'd heard that agere was basically trauma and minors and strictly SFW but had also seen CGL littles refer to getting into littlespace as regressing. I also recently heard that ageplay was sexual play involving age, when I thought ageplay was like cosplay involving age or just playing with your age in general. I hear different things different places and I'm still fairly new as I'm not into the kink/BDSM scrne.

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

Thanks for your input. I'd heard that agere was basically trauma and minors and strictly SFW but had also seen CGL littles refer to getting into littlespace as regressing. I also recently heard that ageplay was sexual play involving age, when I thought ageplay was like cosplay involving age or just playing with your age in general. I hear different things different places and I'm still fairly new as I'm not into the kink/BDSM scrne.

I really don't want to be a person who polices others' terms, but regression isn't the proper term for someone who is participating in ageplay. Ageplay doesn't have to be sexual, just like impact play or petplay or any other kind of play isn't inherently sexual.

 

Regression is not sexual and can not be sexual without the regressor being abused. Some ageplayers also regress, like myself, but the two terms are not interchangeable.

 

I'll try to look up some external resources for you so you don't have to take my word for it. Feel free to DM me if you'd like, but I'll update this and post more sources here later. <3

[Frost Evergarden]

my understanding is as follows.

 

Age Play: role play an age and is a sex thing

 

DDlg: is the parental like dynamic where a Daddy/Mommy takes the parental role taking care of and nurturing a little. this can be and often is romantic in nature or less commonly it can be strictly platonic.

 

ABDL: is a sub group of little which identifies as 1 to 2 or thing or a little who wears diapers for medical reasons or because they enjoy them. using them as intended or just wearing them doesn't matter.

 

I can not speak on age regression as I lack data on it.

 

I hope this is of aid

[Bearly]

my understanding is as follows.

 

Age Play: role play an age and is a sex thing

 

DDlg: is the parental like dynamic where a Daddy/Mommy takes the parental role taking care of and nurturing a little. this can be and often is romantic in nature or less commonly it can be strictly platonic.

 

ABDL: is a sub group of little which identifies as 1 to 2 or thing or a little who wears diapers for medical reasons or because they enjoy them. using them as intended or just wearing them doesn't matter.

 

I can not speak on age regression as I lack data on it.

 

I hope this is of aid

Wait I thought DDLG was a kink thing because of the dom part, and that CGL was inclusive of non-kink and non-daddy/girl specific. How does a platonic dom work?

[junebug0325]

This is a really prickly topic, honestly. I completely understand the need and comfort obtained from medical or trauma-related age regression, but that group of people have hijacked words and phrases that aren't theirs. It makes their own community unsafe and places an undue stress on adult DDlg (and extended community) littles, sexual or not. Age regressors are typically individuals who can't control their age, and because of this they aren't able to consent to sexual activities. This is why age regression needs to be completely separate from the DDlg community. I'm a person who has age regressed in the past, and it isn't always cute and fun. It can be terrifying. My own regression was caused by trauma and it brings me back into a scary space. I wouldn't want anything sexual around me when that happens and I would not be able to consent.

 

Non-sexual littles who do it just because they enjoy it, aren't age regressors, they're into ageplay. BDSM and DDlg isn't just about sex. It perpetuates myths about BDSM that harm the community. There should be more non-sexual resources for non-sexual littles. There should be more help for littles in the DDlg community with trauma, mental illness, etc, but those resources are really only available for the regression community. We as a community need to fix that rather than join other communities that aren't right for us. Agere communities should exist, but it is not the kink community's responsibility to completely change their expression because a new group of people decided the word belongs to them or it offends them. Maybe this just hits me harder as a queer person, who is proud of that label. 

 

Another thing to remember is that agere involves minors, where as any safe kink community should not, regardless of their own sexual status as a little. My best advice is to not be involved in a regression community unless you are a person with trauma or some sort of other medical reason. <3

 

 

I really don't want to be a person who polices others' terms, but regression isn't the proper term for someone who is participating in ageplay. Ageplay doesn't have to be sexual, just like impact play or petplay or any other kind of play isn't inherently sexual.

 

Regression is not sexual and can not be sexual without the regressor being abused. Some ageplayers also regress, like myself, but the two terms are not interchangeable.

 

I'll try to look up some external resources for you so you don't have to take my word for it. Feel free to DM me if you'd like, but I'll update this and post more sources here later. <3

 

I don't think I could've said it better myself. I think these posts cover all the bases in terms of the differences between the community. 

 

The only reason I am part of the Age Regression community is because when I mentally regress, it's trauma related and therefore non-sexual. In the age regression community, there are minors and therefore anyone involved with/in the kink community in terms of DDLG should not involve themselves in the community as to not expose minors to kink. Like I said, the only reason I am involved is because of my trauma, and I keep everything SFW. I also follow people's DNIs (Do Not Interact) if they say that they don't want anyone in kink following them, talking to them, engaging with them. 

 

Age Regression and Age Play communities are separate and should remain separate to protect those in the Age Regression communities who regress because of their trauma and use their regressed headspace to cope, and also to protect minors from being involved in kink, as minors cannot consent to kink.

 

If you have any more specific questions, please feel free to reach out as I would love to answer them! 

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

 

 

Junebug x.

[Frost Evergarden]

This is a really prickly topic, honestly. I completely understand the need and comfort obtained from medical or trauma-related age regression, but that group of people have hijacked words and phrases that aren't theirs. It makes their own community unsafe and places an undue stress on adult DDlg (and extended community) littles, sexual or not. Age regressors are typically individuals who can't control their age, and because of this they aren't able to consent to sexual activities. This is why age regression needs to be completely separate from the DDlg community. I'm a person who has age regressed in the past, and it isn't always cute and fun. It can be terrifying. My own regression was caused by trauma and it brings me back into a scary space. I wouldn't want anything sexual around me when that happens and I would not be able to consent.

 

Non-sexual littles who do it just because they enjoy it, aren't age regressors, they're into ageplay. BDSM and DDlg isn't just about sex. It perpetuates myths about BDSM that harm the community. There should be more non-sexual resources for non-sexual littles. There should be more help for littles in the DDlg community with trauma, mental illness, etc, but those resources are really only available for the regression community. We as a community need to fix that rather than join other communities that aren't right for us. Agere communities should exist, but it is not the kink community's responsibility to completely change their expression because a new group of people decided the word belongs to them or it offends them. Maybe this just hits me harder as a queer person, who is proud of that label. 

 

Another thing to remember is that agere involves minors, where as any safe kink community should not, regardless of their own sexual status as a little. My best advice is to not be involved in a regression community unless you are a person with trauma or some sort of other medical reason. <3

 

age play and regression aren't the only two types of littles. I am not even sure if I would call age players little either, most commonly little part of someones personality, a core part of who they are.

 

I don't know enough about regression to have an opinion

[Frost Evergarden]

Wait I thought DDLG was a kink thing because of the dom part, and that CGL was inclusive of non-kink and non-daddy/girl specific. How does a platonic dom work?

 

DDlg and CGL are pretty much the same thing. The dynamic is the same. For a minority DDlg is a sex thing for the majority it is not. Platonic in theory works in that someone has authority over the other but they are merely friends not lovers. It is a kind because there is a power exchange, not all power exchanges are sexual.

[Frost Evergarden]

I don't think I could've said it better myself. I think these posts cover all the bases in terms of the differences between the community. 

 

The only reason I am part of the Age Regression community is because when I mentally regress, it's trauma related and therefore non-sexual. In the age regression community, there are minors and therefore anyone involved with/in the kink community in terms of DDLG should not involve themselves in the community as to not expose minors to kink. Like I said, the only reason I am involved is because of my trauma, and I keep everything SFW. I also follow people's DNIs (Do Not Interact) if they say that they don't want anyone in kink following them, talking to them, engaging with them. 

 

Age Regression and Age Play communities are separate and should remain separate to protect those in the Age Regression communities who regress because of their trauma and use their regressed headspace to cope, and also to protect minors from being involved in kink, as minors cannot consent to kink.

 

If you have any more specific questions, please feel free to reach out as I would love to answer them! 

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

 

 

Junebug x.

the majority of the DDlg community has non sexual littles. 

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

age play and regression aren't the only two types of littles. I am not even sure if I would call age players little either, most commonly little part of someones personality, a core part of who they are.

 

I don't know enough about regression to have an opinion

Ageplayers are really the only type of littles. Age regression is a medical term, related to trauma, mental illness, or some other condition. Of course within that, there are many types of littles: middles, brats, etc.

 

For a lot of people, ageplay and the BDSM community is important to who they are. It's important to me. But that doesn't mean that participating in those communities isn't an active choice. You're right in that some of the DDlg community is non-sexual, but power dynamics, rules, punishments, etc. are all things that only adults can consent to. People who are in an active state of regression are essentially minors, and there are no minors in kink.

 

Cg/l is the wider term that involves all genders, sort of like how GRSM (gender romantic and sexual minorities) is to LGBT.

 

I hope this helps clear things up. <3

[Frost Evergarden]

Ageplayers are really the only type of littles. Age regression is a medical term, related to trauma, mental illness, or some other condition. Of course within that, there are many types of littles: middles, brats, etc.

 

For a lot of people, ageplay and the BDSM community is important to who they are. It's important to me. But that doesn't mean that participating in those communities isn't an active choice. You're right in that some of the DDlg community is non-sexual, but power dynamics, rules, punishments, etc. are all things that only adults can consent to. People who are in an active state of regression are essentially minors, and there are no minors in kink.

 

Cg/l is the wider term that involves all genders, sort of like how GRSM (gender romantic and sexual minorities) is to LGBT.

 

I hope this helps clear things up. <3

age play pretends to be an age in a role play situation. I have met plenty of littles who are little because of their personality. I get little and it isn't age play or regression it is just who I am. 

 

so no they aren't the only kind of little. don't try to limit folks into only one label. 

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

Wait I thought DDLG was a kink thing because of the dom part, and that CGL was inclusive of non-kink and non-daddy/girl specific. How does a platonic dom work?

You're right in that it is a kink thing. But there can be platonic DDlg relationships. Some people may not feel sexual or romantic attraction, but that doesn't mean they don't enjoy the power exchange or dynamics. They may also have a platonic Dom and a seperate romantic or sexual relationship with another partner.

 

The thing that makes this adult is the power exchange. As an adult, one can choose to give their power to another person, but the reason isn't always sexual. People can obtain comfort, affection, healthy structure, and friendship in these relationships - most DDlg relationships aren't only about sex. I would argue that it isn't even the central component.

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

age play pretends to be an age in a role play situation. I have met plenty of littles who are little because of their personality. I get little and it isn't age play or regression it is just who I am. 

 

so no they aren't the only kind of little. don't try to limit folks into only one label.

 

That's still considered ageplay. I'm a little as well and it's encompassing to my personality. But not all childlike people are littles. We're into ageplay, which is why we're on this forum.

[Bearly]

Wow, and to think someone told me that being in a platonic CGL pair meant we were just playing pretend and it would end with broken hearts, or something like that.

I'm less confused about agere now but just more confused about everything else because of conflicting definitions.

Edited September 14, 2020 by Bearly

[Frost Evergarden]

That's still considered ageplay. I'm a little as well and it's encompassing to my personality. But not all childlike people are littles. We're into ageplay, which is why we're on this forum.

you can certainly keep that definition if you like. Age play is purely role play in a sexual scenario. So most littles are not into age play, they are simply little. 

If the label age play works for you cool but you really should speak only for yourself. Most if not all childlike people are little although they may not even know that it is a thing. 

 

pretending to be say 6 in a bedroom situation is fine for those who are sexual, but not all that enter a 6 year old head space is going to want to be fucked which is what age play is.

[junebug0325]

the majority of the DDlg community has non sexual littles. 

 

I wouldn't say the majority. While there are non sexual littles within the DDLG community, DDLG is still a kink because there are sexual aspects to it. 

 

 

 

 

Junebug x.

[Guest fhihfidhfd38478]

It is very important within a BDSM community that we all use the same terms so we all understand what each other mean. If we all go by different definitions, not only are we incorrect, we run the risk of putting oneself or others in a dangerous or otherwise misinformed situation. We are lucky to have such a diverse community, but even so, we have rules and standards. What ageplay means to me may be very different than what it means to you. There are no solid textbook definitions, but the community has long established terms, rules, usage systems, and even symbols to keep ourselves safe. These terms are often deeply ingrained into the queer community and it is disrespectful and potentially harmful not to abide by them. 

 

Here are further sources from a variety of vanilla and BDSM resources. 

 

According to Kinkly.com:

 

Age play is a type of role-play in which one or more partners acts as though they are a different age than they really are. Props and clothing - such as ruffled dresses, diapers, children's toys and even cribs - may be used during age play, and this fetish can be sexual or non-sexual. If it is sexual, it's not uncommon for incestuous elements to be incorporated into the role-play. Some examples of this include when an "older" age player assumes the role of an older relative, such as a mother, father, aunt, uncle or sibling.

 

According to AgePlay101.com

 

AgePlay usually involves an individual pretending to be younger than they are, though that is not always the case. While most ageplayers will pretend to be a baby or young child, there are those who take on a teenage persona. More rarely, an ageplayer will assume the role of someone older than their biological age, such as an elderly person. Bigs or caretakers are ageplayers participating in an AgePlay dynamic, but most do not assume an age beyond their own. Realistically, it is quite possible for someone who is biologically older to be ageplaying as the younger person within the dynamic. There are even some ageplayers that don’t identify with a specific age at all!

AgePlay can be sexual or non-sexual in nature. For some it is a kink or a fetish, more commonly known as a paraphilia, but for many in the community it is a more innocent expression of self, a desire to relive parts of childhood or regain feelings of innocence.

As you can see, AgePlay is a vast and diverse spectrum. Truly, it can be whatever you make it, and the more you put into it, the more you’ll get out!

 

This article in Healthline.com should adequately explain age regression as well:

 

Age regression occurs when someone reverts to a younger state of mind. This retreat may be only a few years younger than the person’s physical age. It could also be much younger, into early childhood or even infancy.

People who practice age regression may begin showing juvenile behaviors like thumb-sucking or whining. Others may refuse to engage in adult conversations and handle issues they’re facing.

Age regression is sometimes used in psychology and hypnotherapy. It can also be used as a self-help tool, or something someone does to reduce stress.

 

Again, age regression is never sexual and often has a deeper psychological reason behind it. I would not recommend pursuing any dynamic with someone who identifies their headspace as regression instead of ageplay, as this is essentially involving a minor in kink. 

Edited September 14, 2020 by yesdanithemani

[Frost Evergarden]

I wouldn't say the majority. While there are non sexual littles within the DDLG community, DDLG is still a kink because there are sexual aspects to it. 

 

 

 

 

Junebug x.

I have been in the community for years and only seen a dozen or so sexual littles.

[Frost Evergarden]

It is very important within a BDSM community that we all use the same terms so we all understand what each other mean. If we all go by different definitions, not only are we incorrect, we run the risk of putting oneself or others in a dangerous or otherwise misinformed situation. We are lucky to have such a diverse community, but even so, we have rules and standards. What ageplay means to me may be very different than what it means to you. There are no solid textbook definitions, but the community has long established terms, rules, usage systems, and even symbols to keep ourselves safe. These terms are often deeply ingrained into the queer community and it is disrespectful and potentially harmful not to abide by them. 

 

Here are further sources from a variety of vanilla and BDSM resources. 

 

According to Kinkly.com:

 

Age play is a type of role-play in which one or more partners acts as though they are a different age than they really are. Props and clothing - such as ruffled dresses, diapers, children's toys and even cribs - may be used during age play, and this fetish can be sexual or non-sexual. If it is sexual, it's not uncommon for incestuous elements to be incorporated into the role-play. Some examples of this include when an "older" age player assumes the role of an older relative, such as a mother, father, aunt, uncle or sibling.

 

According to AgePlay101.com

 

AgePlay usually involves an individual pretending to be younger than they are, though that is not always the case. While most ageplayers will pretend to be a baby or young child, there are those who take on a teenage persona. More rarely, an ageplayer will assume the role of someone older than their biological age, such as an elderly person. Bigs or caretakers are ageplayers participating in an AgePlay dynamic, but most do not assume an age beyond their own. Realistically, it is quite possible for someone who is biologically older to be ageplaying as the younger person within the dynamic. There are even some ageplayers that don’t identify with a specific age at all!

AgePlay can be sexual or non-sexual in nature. For some it is a kink or a fetish, more commonly known as a paraphilia, but for many in the community it is a more innocent expression of self, a desire to relive parts of childhood or regain feelings of innocence.

As you can see, AgePlay is a vast and diverse spectrum. Truly, it can be whatever you make it, and the more you put into it, the more you’ll get out!

 

This article in Healthline.com should adequately explain age regression as well:

 

Age regression occurs when someone reverts to a younger state of mind. This retreat may be only a few years younger than the person’s physical age. It could also be much younger, into early childhood or even infancy.

People who practice age regression may begin showing juvenile behaviors like thumb-sucking or whining. Others may refuse to engage in adult conversations and handle issues they’re facing.

Age regression is sometimes used in psychology and hypnotherapy. It can also be used as a self-help tool, or something someone does to reduce stress.

 

Again, age regression is never sexual and often has a deeper psychological reason behind it. I would not recommend pursuing any dynamic with someone who identifies their headspace as regression instead of ageplay, as this is essentially involving a minor in kink. 

I would never use the term for anything other than a sexual role play thing.

you can use whatever term you choose. However you don't have the right to demand others to do so. there is no right or wrong way of being little or a daddy as long as it is not predatory.

You should not forget that adults are still adults as well.