Needing some advice...

[PrincessGlitterKitten]

Let me start off by saying hello since I'm new here.

So...my problem is that my husband and I used to live this lifestyle and about a year ago it stopped. I've brought it up before that we should try to get back into things, but it goes nowhere. I just don't think it's in him anymore. I tried pushing that side of me wayyy deep down, but i just can't anymore. Especially with everything going on right now i need an outlet like that. Now I'm having to hide it, but i don't really know how since we're home literally 24/7 together. I just end up feeling embarrassed by it but it's who i am and i can't help it...

[Guest BrieNN]

I get how important it is to have one's needs met. I also think it's important not to push someone into something they aren't into.

If your husband isn't into this anymore, it's best to accept that - provided you had honest conversations about it and he expressed why, for better understanding. Something you can bring on the table is you finding someone with whom you can have those needs met and how best to make it work for you and him.

[princess cotton grass]

i think brie made some good points.

 

neither of you should be forcing yourself to do/not do things.

 

i'm sure that he cares about you a lot and he should be understanding that you need your littlespace as a outlet. perhaps the two of you could consider you having a babysitter (someone who you are not in a relationship with). if he is not comfortable with that, consider siblings instead. by this i mean other little(s) that you can be in little space with. i think this would be great for you as you would have someone to play and have fun with who you can support and be supported by. hopefully this would be something your husband is more comfortable with too.

 

hope this helps!

 

[junebug0325]

Heya,

 

I completely agree with the points that people above me have said. Neither of you should be pushed into any direction, whether it him being pushed into something he's not into or you being pushed to supress something that obviously means a lot to you. Especially in the current events going on in the world, you need an outlet, and if being in littlespace provides that for you then I think you should persue it.

 

What I would recommend is you sit down and have an open and honest conversation with him. If being littlespace is important to you, then you need to say that. Tell him how you feel. Ask him how he feels about continuing to be a caregiver. Talk about alternatives. If he can't be a caregiver for you, can you find someone else? It may be a babysitter, a sibling, or even just a little friend that you are able to connect with and have little space time with. In my opinion, if certain needs aren't being met then you need to talk about them and find a way for those needs to be met. If you don't find the need for a babysitter or sibling, that's fine. But you should still be able to engage in your littlespace and have a safe and healthy outlet to express your needs.

 

I hope this helps! If you would like someone to talk about it with more, you're always welcome to send me a message! Good luck!

 

 

 

 

Junebug xx