A question about platonic care givers...

[MissPattch]

I've seen others mention that they have caregiver friends who they turn to for stuff, but i'm curious what kind of things people do or what kind of support people get from a platonic CG? I have a very good Daddy friend who has helped me out  a lot this last week, after what happened, and his support has been invaluable, and i don't think even he realises just how much. It made me wonder just where the line stops between being a CG and being a Daddy to some one? Are there things you should only ask of a Daddy? 

[RavenclawPrincess]

Whether or not you're formally partnered is really the only difference most of the time in my opinion. As long as everything is consensual friends can help each other with whatever they want. Where the line is drawn is going to be different to people on an individual basis. Your best bet is to talk to your friend about what is/isn't ok for you to ask them to help you with. 

[Guest Looby-Lou]

I've seen others mention that they have caregiver friends who they turn to for stuff, but i'm curious what kind of things people do or what kind of support people get from a platonic CG? I have a very good Daddy friend who has helped me out  a lot this last week, after what happened, and his support has been invaluable, and i don't think even he realises just how much. It made me wonder just where the line stops between being a CG and being a Daddy to some one? Are there things you should only ask of a Daddy? 

Although I do chat with CGs or Daddies from time to time, I don't have a regular platonic one and never would. It's more if there's a particular topic that one or other of us wants to chat about and when that's done, so is the connection.

 

You ask the difference between being a CG and a Daddy. I think those are titles which can be useful, but the people involved in the dynamic will work out for themselves what exactly's involved. Personally I think someone can be a CG without being a Daddy, but that most Daddies also have CG qualities.

 

Are there things you should only ask a Daddy? Why would that be? At the end of the day it's a title. Every relationship has it's boundaries. That's what matters - what the people involved agree upon as ok or not ok.

 

I notice you describe the person in your life as a "Daddy friend" i.e. not a CG or Daddy. Which might beg another question ... when does someone stop being a friend, and start being your CG or Daddy.

 

Wishing you happy times,

Looby 

Edited July 26, 2020 by Looby-Lou

[baby_k]

It's friend vs. partner to me. So, is there anything romantic ( or lustful ) going on?

 

Daddy vs GC, not much different. Maybe caregiver is better general term as no gender there.

 

Person who was my daddy once has been my caregiver after: there was no relationship except this agreed caregiving role where this person would hep me with issues in my life, listen to me, help me with nightmares.... you name it. BUT nothing sexual or romantic. However, this was just something agreed by us, not that the tittle had any part of it. For us was easier to make difference between how things were ( he was my daddy ) and how they were after ( just caregiving, nothing sexual ). Someone could have called this platonic daddy rel, or platonic caregiver.

 

I also have daddy friend, who is just a friend. No caregiving there even we can talk of ddlg stuff. Him I can call "my ex-daddy" or more likely "my friend" as those are terms describe our relationship the best. Will he help me, listen to me, calm me down if needed? Yes, but that is not his role. He is just a friend and good person. He also is not my automatic go-to-person if I have issues.

 

I think if someone is one's caregiver, there is more responsability and it goes deeper than if someone is just friend ( even sometimes your friends can go great measures for you f course but they do it more because of their personality than because of your relationship or because it's their "job" ).

 

 

Edit: with this "caregiver" there also was dynamic, and I would be little with him, where as with my friend I would just be equals with him so to say. Meaning: he wouldn't really baby me or anything like that more than would be okay with friends. With the caregiver I could go full on with any little tendencies I have.

Edited July 26, 2020 by baby_k