Do confident littles intimidate DDs?

[Bearly]

I don't think I'd say that I find strong littles intimidating. If I were going to date a little, for example, I'd hope they had a pretty solid adult side, too. Littles who are strong and/or independent in littlespace would just take some of the fun out of it, if anything, because the distance between littlespace and adult self would be much shorter. You'd have to be mean (especially in littlespace) to intimidate me.

[littlekami]

Learning and growing, and as a result becoming confident and independent, are part of growing up. It's also a fundamental part of the daddy/caregiver role.

 

I think in any relationship, and especially DDlg relationships, both people should do their best to contribute to a healthy and nurturing environment that they can learn and grow in. 

 

Not only that, but in most cases you need to be confident and independent to lead a fruitful adult life, even if you're a little. If I met a potential daddy/dom/caregiver who didn't understand this, or whose actions and/or words did not promote learning, growth and confidence, it wouldn't work out at all. 

 

As a little, I want any potential daddy/dom/caregiver/mentor to want to invest in my long term learning, growth and confidence. Anything less than that is simply kinky sex with DDlg elements at best. 

 

As a switchy caregiver, I would want to meet a little that wants to learn, grow and become confident and then I'd want to help them do just that. I'd want to see them blossom and be proud knowing that I helped along the way. Anything less than that and I would feel like a fake mommy/caregiver/domme/whatever. 

 

I think anyone who is intimidated by confidence or independence, or who doesn't want those traits in a partner, is possibly looking for someone they can keep weak so they can control and exploit them for their own personal gain. That isn't what a good daddy/caregiver/mentor should do. 

 

Lastly, I think that some people use the title "daddy" to define a specific type of sexual domination instead of the holistic definition. They're saying that they want a submissive girl, but they're not into bdsm or putting in effort. I've found that mostly they're just into anal and acting like they're in charge or something for once in their life.

[Amber_dragon]

I'm still new, but this was a great thread.  In my mind, wouldn't it be more appealing to a true Daddy to have a very strong and confident women who doesn't NEED him in adult life, respect and trust him enough to give him that control as a little, to let down the toughness and be soft, let him lead and make rules...  rather than someone who NEEDS someone to function searching for someone to be dependent on? 

 

I also think there is a difference between someone who genuinely enjoys care giving/leading for what it is, compared to someone who maybe isn't super successful or strong in real life finding someone vulnerable to enact that power over just to feel good? Just some thoughts. 

[Guest Oligoclase]

To answer the opening question, I prefer confident, well educated littles who can independently adult if needed. In an attempt to label this, perhaps saying I’m wanting a wife-daughter (in the vein of student-athlete, she’s my wife first, daughter second*) might give some idea of what I’m seeking. Someone who’s my equal, willing to join in the responsibility of decision making  (for both of us if needed), and has no problems being independent. Yet, she has a little side and wants to share with me her world as her nurturing, loving daddy.

 

*Or, if you prefer, I’m her husband first and daddy second.

[Guest XoX_SweetPea_XoX]

It makes my daddy real happy, and he loves when I try to be confident, and independent. He is not intimidated at all by it, and is right there to cheer me on, or be there if I fail. He gets excited with me when I have a independent day, like last year I had a day where I decided I wanted to do the monthly supplement run. It a trip I've taken every month with him, they all know me, it's 2 buses, and he wouldn't be on the other end. We planned it out, he gave me cab money in case, he told his boss and planned a good time so he could leave work if needed, cause it was planned for him at work. I did have a meltdown, and ended up calling him at work, the clerk knowing me as a regular talked me through it with daddy on the phone, and I was feeling good again, and bused home. Sometimes I feel like he wishes I was grown up, cause I know he gets exhausted by me sometimes, and it shows, like when at doctors, but at least there daddy has help from social workers, and nurses. Daddy also loves my confidence at home in knowledge, and that I like to start arguments with him, he love arguing me. I come to fully ready, prepared, and catch him off guard, but the next day after he's had time he come back at me twice as ready. He really loves my brain, just wishes it wasn't broken sometime, but as he says, I'm unique, and special, and keep trying to grow, even if it never happens he loves me. When I told daddy I found this place, he even supported me in join to try and make friends, something new to me. I think a good daddy should help you grow and not be intimidated. 

 

I just learn the term DDLG this week, and just found this site, I've been reading a lot about fake daddy's and it keeps worrying me, it sounds awful. It makes me feel lucky to have found this community so late, and already having a good daddy for 21 years, so only looking for friends because I spent 21 years without friends, only my daddy, and sister who helps take care of me when daddy can't or needs a break.