Is your partner not your daddy?

[Guest InsideAna]

[SoulEater]

I'm in a relationship similar to this but the opposite way, I cope by having some of the best friends on here and in Discord, whilst I may not experience directly myself the joy of having a little indo enjoy seeing my friends getting to be themselfs/with their partners etc.. Its something I came to terms over a year ago and tbh I am happy.

[Bluepandavideos]

My boyfriend really isnt into ddlg either. Hes encouraging to be myself but he just isnt a kinky person. And thats ok, I wouldn't change him.

 

We have talked about, if I did want a caregiver, he would be open to the idea.

 

He just wants me to be happy and be the person I am. I love him to the moon and back.

 

Sometimes I wish he would do more things, but he just has never really been exposed to the kink world before and hes actually really shy.

 

I think maybe you should discuss your concerns with your boyfriend. It's best to ensure open communication.

Edited April 23, 2020 by Bluepandavideos

[Guest InsideAna]

I think maybe you should discuss your concerns with your boyfriend. It's best to ensure open communication.

We do talk about it, but neither one of us would be comfortable bringing another person into our relationship. I’d also never leave him, even if I did find the perfect daddy elsewhere, I still love my BF. Tbh he’s adjusted to a lot for me already, and I’ve introduced this to him in stages. But deep down I know this isn’t his thing. Even if he did want to participate just to make me happy I wouldn’t want him to. I want him to be himself too, you know?

[Bluepandavideos]

We do talk about it, but neither one of us would be comfortable bringing another person into our relationship. I’d also never leave him, even if I did find the perfect daddy elsewhere, I still love my BF. Tbh he’s adjusted to a lot for me already, and I’ve introduced this to him in stages. But deep down I know this isn’t his thing. Even if he did want to participate just to make me happy I wouldn’t want him to. I want him to be himself too, you know?

Baby steps help. Ive been with my dude for 3 years and it took 2 of those years to be open to kink because he never experienced before.

 

A lot of kink relationships don't just happen. And sometimes just because you love someone doesnt mean you should be with them if they arent fulfilling your needs in a relationship.

[Lilith-Lynn-Lupin]

I am in a boat where my husband is not my Daddy. My husband wants to know nothing about my little life. He sees my little play area, my paci, etc. and just ignores them. I have made wonderful friends here and on Discord as well. I have also met a Daddy. We are platonic. He takes care of my little side. It is LDR so my husband does not feel threatened in any way. You have to decide what is going to work for you. This is what I have found works for me. Best of luck and if you need someone to talk to, I am available.

 

Sincerely,

 

LLL

[Nymph]

I am pretty much 24/7 but very few daddies can handle this. Does it mean I will not be happy unless I find someone who does? nope, I just need someone who accepts me as I am and gets into it every once in a while to have my needs met.

 

Now I know you feel helpless because you opened up to your guy and he said NO... hubby said no too when I first brought it up, I did not press the issue because in my heart he was already my daddy, he is very nurturing and affectionate, spoils me and doesn't judge me, buys me hello kitty stuff even haha. Anyways, a few months later, after he had been reading about it without telling me, he was more open to it and we tried a few things, not long after he asked me to call him Daddy.

 

Maybe your guy will never be into it and you must respect that, but maybe he just doesn't really know what this is about. If you are attracted to him and you are a little, odds are your guy has a bit of a Daddy personality going on or at the very least a little.

 

I have made wonderful friends here and on Discord as well. 

 

Hey LLL, I have been looking for a discord server, can you recommend me one?

[Guest InsideAna]

I am in a boat where my husband is not my Daddy. My husband wants to know nothing about my little life. He sees my little play area, my paci, etc. and just ignores them. I have made wonderful friends here and on Discord as well. I have also met a Daddy. We are platonic. He takes care of my little side. It is LDR so my husband does not feel threatened in any way. You have to decide what is going to work for you. This is what I have found works for me. Best of luck and if you need someone to talk to, I am available.

 

LLL

See this is fascinating to me. My man chooses to ignore certain things too, like my sippie cup or my bottles. But other things like my coloring pages he’ll hang on the fridge for me. He’s not completely against this, he’s just nowhere near as enthusiastic as I am about it. And how did you go about finding a platonic daddy? You can private message me if you like, but I am dying to hear how you did that and how your relationship works.

[Guest InsideAna]

I feel in the same boat as you. Now... I’ve heard this word a lot, what are discord’s?

[Little kaiya]

Discord is an app that you can use to communicate with other people

[Vampiress]

https://discordapp.com/ You can use on browser, desktop app on computer, or app on phone or tablet. Just a communication platform that is very, very popular.

[LittlePupRune]

I call my partner Daddy sometimes when I’m feeling little and he accepts it and does encourage headspace. However I wouldn’t call him a cg/l Daddy, he’s more on the path to be a Leather Daddy. As is our current dynamic is mostly Sir/boy. But he does call me “little boy” and “little one” in a soft voice, gives me stuffies, will watch little shows with me. He guards my headspace but isn’t enthusiastically a cg/l Daddy. As is I’m a fairly quiet and self-sustaining little and don’t need that much from a caregiver.

[Guest InsideAna]

^It’s nice to hear from the male little perspective

[The Muslimah]

I'm in a open relationship with a man who is not into ddlg, but lets me have caregivers  I currently have a daddy thats online only for now.

[Bearly]

I was with my partner for over 4 years before I got into this scene. I have a platonic little and have platonic interactions with littles. My partner doesn't care as long as it doesn't get sexual, and I'm happily monogamous with him.

[Acceptance]

I am also in a relationship with someone who isn’t really into the caregiving side of ddlg. I love him more than anything and he is my best friend. He is completely understanding of me and my needs and has allowed me to talk to other people to find a caregiver type. I did and it was working really well. I finally felt whole but now that I’ve gotten to know my caregiver a lot more I think I have feelings for him too. Is that possible? To be in love with two people? Or am I just being shallow?

[Little kaiya]

Of course someone can be in love with more than one person. I love my Wife deeply and have been married for 14 years but I also have a Boyfriend/Daddy of 2.5 years that I love equally as deeply. Loving more than one person ABSOLUTELY does NOT make someone shallow. It doesn't make you any better or worse, it's just your reality.

 

Polyamory certainly is not for everyone and there are still a lot of people in society that will be judgmental. Ultimately it's about doing what works for you AND whoever else is involved.

[Acceptance]

What do you do when neither of them are open to sharing? How do you choose between two different people that complete you?

[Little kaiya]

Well, I can't really give any advice from personal experience as I've never experienced that situation. I can say that for my Wife, Daddy and I, it isnt a situation of "sharing". We all love one another and are in a loving relationship that just manifests in different ways between my Wife and I, my Daddy and I, my Wife and Daddy and the three of as a whole.

 

To answer your question though, if both of them fully complete you then you follow your heart and pick the person you see having the best life with and who you can give the best life as well. Odds are though when you say both complete you, it sounds more like both give you different things, my apologies if i've misread your posts, and that's a very different situation.

 

Ultimately if neither of them are open to polyamory you need to respect their wishes and make a decision as trying to have both could just end up with a lot of hurt feelings.

Edited June 11, 2020 by Little kaiya

[Acceptance]

Thank you!! I appreciate the advise.