Do you ever feel self conscious about being a little?

[little1grl]

I'm relatively new to being a little and discovering it. (Well its been over a year but I haven't had as much of an opportunity to explore it because my Sir was not a Daddy Dom and mostly just indulged me at times).

But sometimes I feel self conscious about it and bad about it. I live in a different situation now (not with my Sir) and with roommates who don't know about my little side (and I'd like to keep it that way). I feel like several people I know would be horrified if they learned I was into this. So I'm finding it very hard to play and get into little space because I have to constantly whisper whenever I play.

I'm trying to do things like watch cartoons... but I don't get into little space as easily with that as I do with playing. I watched My Little Pony for the first time. I kind of liked it, but it was also kind of boring too. I'm not sure I was getting into little space all that easily with it. 

 

And, I feel a lot more self conscious about it now that I live with roommates who would probably think badly of me if they knew. I was wondering if other people felt the same way. I was looking for a Daddy that would give me a safe place to play (and someone to interact with me when I'm little) but this pandemic has pretty much put a dampener on that.

[princessfreckles]

I'm sorry that your former Dom wasn't more open to helping you explore your little side. That's very difficult. I have felt self conscious about being a little, however I eventually realized it's who I am. It just took a while for me to find a name for it. Now that I know what it is, and it's what I am I don't feel shame. Do I go around informing everyone I know that I'm a little? No, however I also do a pretty horrible job at hiding it. If my vanilla friends had any basic kink knowledge, they'd figure out pretty quickly that I'm a little. 

 

As for doing little activities, there are quite a few you can do that your roommates probably wouldn't give too much thought to tbh. Example, watching Disney movies. I know plenty of adults who aren't little that enjoy the newest Disney movies. Also coloring, there are so many adult coloring books, markers, and colored pencil sets. Again, your roommates wouldn't care too much. I know a lot of very crafty littles, they don't necessarily make obvious little things like pacis. They enjoy making bracelets, doing a cookie and canvas (for me wine isn't little space friendly lol), water colors, etc. 

 

In terms of feeling comfortable easing into little space, I understand that it can be difficult when you don't live alone. However, like I mentioned above you can totally do some things that make you feel little, but might not get you completely into little space. However they aren't dead giveaways that you're a little since you don't feel comfortable letting your housemates know that you're a little. 

[Guest Sassy.Little.Princess17]

You are not the only one.

My last relationship was not a Daddy Dom, he was very vanilla despite saying he was a Daddy. I've also felt self continuous about being little. I want to hide it, but I also know that being who I am helps me feel better about myself.

I live with my parents right now because of the Pandemic, but after I'm moving back to the place I share with a friend and I know that they probably wouldn't approve even though I wouldn't mind them knowing about my Little Space. I know my parents would be horrified if they found out about my Little Space so I haven't been able to really be my true little self since the Pandemic started because I really don't want my parents and family to know.

Having to whisper when you play is not fun. I do try to stick to cartoons like My Little Pony, Doc McStuffins, Lion Guard, and Care Bears. I also color and draw and do cute puzzles when I'm trying to be/when I am Little. My family doesn't think me watching Disney and cartoons and coloring and doing puzzles is weird because I've always done that. I don't have any little gear because of my family, but I'm hoping that with me moving out after the Pandemic I will be able to start getting little gear other than stuffies.

Don't be afraid to be yourself, being yourself will help make you feel better and stronger now and in the future.

[Vampiress]

I totally relate to the feeling. I've been kicked out of a chatroom before for saying I was a little that was for adult stuff. I've seen lots of anti-DDlg stuff on the internet because a lot of people assume this has to do with exploiting children even though it isn't at all but we could argue with them until we're blue in the face and they still won't believe us. I USED to feel that way about DDlg before I took some time to actually learn about it and proved myself wrong, but a lot of people aren't that open minded. At the end of the day, I guess we just have to learn to accept this about ourselves but be careful who we share it with because it feels taboo to a lot of people, but it doesn't make us wrong for liking it because we're not doing anything that hurts anyone. We're really only hurting ourselves by beating ourselves up over it. I hope when the pandemic is over you can find someone who is accepting of you and lets you explore your little side safely where you feel accepted.

Edited July 8, 2020 by Batgirl

[little1grl]

Thank you guys. I have my own room so I was still thinking of getting some toys. Little bit nervous about it (pun not intended). Not sure how it will arrive from Amazon if I get it. Also trying to figure out if it’s right to even order stuff online with the pandemic going.

 

Anyway yeah I do feel very self conscious about it. It was easier when I lived with my Sir because even though he’s not a Daddy Dom he sure acted like one sometimes. He would even play pretend with me with my stuffies. Though not at first... I remember before I came out to him about it he didn’t want me to have my stuffie that I got at Disney with me. I remember I cried because I felt like I couldn’t be myself. But then I got up the courage to talk to him about it and after he read about it he was very accepting. But it was never really his thing either so mostly he just indulged me.

 

But then our relationship changed and we no longer live together. So I have roommates now. My room is the safest place I have for it but, I do have to whisper.

 

I’ve tried watching cartoons and stuff like My little pony, but I don’t seem to get into little space as easily with that. Same with coloring... I can do it I think but it’s just harder.

 

I think a big part of my self consciousness is thinking what people I live with and people I know would think if they knew. I think some would be horrified.

Edited April 12, 2020 by little1grl

[LittleTeacup]

I used to feel self conscious about being childlike, but it's going away now I know I'm actually just Little and not dysfunctionally developed or something. There's still stuff I feel more comfortable doing alone, like when I play in the woods, but wow do I feel great just not caring if people think I'm weird.

 

I also have ASD which I think overlaps a lot with my littleness, so my parents have learned to accept it as just who they have as a daughter. They used to be worried about me and tell me I couldn't be who I am (not quoting obviously, but this is what it boiled down to). I'd burst out crying or just insist I wanted to do something my way. They couldn't stop me and eventually just accepted it. This was before I knew about being Little.

 

I've had my closest friends since middle and high school, so we've all grown into adults together and I've just been who I am with some evolution. If I go overboard and have an outright fit, they'll either comfort me or just tell me to stop depending on the exact situation. I don't worry about losing them. When trying to make new friends, it's hard of course, and I'm awkward at first, but I keep it real and be honest about who I am (not using the Little word since it's unnecessary, but just what I like and that I do childlike things often). Most people at least find it charming.

 

There is absolutely no need to use the Little word or reference ddlg. I only discovered this stuff as something beyond liking to call someone daddy in bed last year, yet I've been myself my whole life. Even as a preteen I'd play by myself and pretend I was 5 again. I know self confidence comes slowly, especially when you're around people who shame you, whether on purpose or not, but it's worth it to work towards. I have anxious episodes about other things in my life, especially when I'm frustrated over something I have trouble with or having an ASD related disturbance (like my mom helping me change my bedsheets today and all my pillows were on the floor and something bothered me and I hit my head on the mattress several times). Maybe it's my neurodivergent condition that leads people to not question me too much (if they know, like my family and close friends), but also I tend to glare at people who make mean comments or be casual about it like they're the strange one for judging me. I don't run into too many conflicts about it, and the few are strangers who pass quickly.

[little1grl]

I used to feel self conscious about being childlike, but it's going away now I know I'm actually just Little and not dysfunctionally developed or something. There's still stuff I feel more comfortable doing alone, like when I play in the woods, but wow do I feel great just not caring if people think I'm weird.

 

I also have ASD which I think overlaps a lot with my littleness, so my parents have learned to accept it as just who they have as a daughter. They used to be worried about me and tell me I couldn't be who I am (not quoting obviously, but this is what it boiled down to). I'd burst out crying or just insist I wanted to do something my way. They couldn't stop me and eventually just accepted it. This was before I knew about being Little.

 

I've had my closest friends since middle and high school, so we've all grown into adults together and I've just been who I am with some evolution. If I go overboard and have an outright fit, they'll either comfort me or just tell me to stop depending on the exact situation. I don't worry about losing them. When trying to make new friends, it's hard of course, and I'm awkward at first, but I keep it real and be honest about who I am (not using the Little word since it's unnecessary, but just what I like and that I do childlike things often). Most people at least find it charming.

 

There is absolutely no need to use the Little word or reference ddlg. I only discovered this stuff as something beyond liking to call someone daddy in bed last year, yet I've been myself my whole life. Even as a preteen I'd play by myself and pretend I was 5 again. I know self confidence comes slowly, especially when you're around people who shame you, whether on purpose or not, but it's worth it to work towards. I have anxious episodes about other things in my life, especially when I'm frustrated over something I have trouble with or having an ASD related disturbance (like my mom helping me change my bedsheets today and all my pillows were on the floor and something bothered me and I hit my head on the mattress several times). Maybe it's my neurodivergent condition that leads people to not question me too much (if they know, like my family and close friends), but also I tend to glare at people who make mean comments or be casual about it like they're the strange one for judging me. I don't run into too many conflicts about it, and the few are strangers who pass quickly.

Oh I’m not obviously little with most people. I only discovered my littleness when I was in a bdsm relationship and I noticed I started talking in a childlike voice whenever I got submissive. Then I started looking into it and exploring and trying things more. I only started playing after I found out about DDLG and gave it a try. I realized I have some childlike qualities to my personality (the way I get excited... other things too). But it’s totally something I can keep private, I also have a lot of adult interests and hobbies too. So nobody really knows but my old Sir and also anyone these days I’ve tried to date.

[BabyDaisy81]

Not self conscious about it, I’ve always been somewhat little..  I have more toddler looking clothes than adults clothes and I don’t care, I travel with my teddy bear Henry and when people ask I talk about him.. Last time I was a patient aboard a medical flight I cuddled Henry and chewed my thumb all the way home.. My partner is my daddy and he parents me wherever we are.. To me it’s the same as my being queer (I’m bisexual), a part of me so I don’t feel embarrassed or whatever..

[Trueshellz]

Very self concious. Already got looks for being childish and having lots of teddies. I’m a huge Hello Kitty fan and love pandas. I’m very concious that people around me would find this very weird and odd. Never met anyone who was into it IRL so being here is quite refreshing. I tend to have my little time at home alone which makes things easier I guess

[Little kaiya]

I never feel self-conscious about it when I'm with my Daddy but certainly if I'm by myself I have felt self-conscious. Usually though if I start to feel that way I'll call my Daddy and He'll calm me down.

[LullabyBye]

I don't think I ever got into littlespace without being self-conscious... Even when I'm alone I keep myself on guard so no one finds about it. I can't believe I only realized that after reading this topic btw.

[Guest hideouslovely]

Sometimes I feel self conscious about being little when I'm around certain people (a family member, my partner's friends) but I've realised that it shouldn't matter because this is who I am and who I want to be.  This is something I'm working on. 

 

How aware of your roommates are you when they're in their rooms?  If you're worried about being overheard then perhaps you could try putting on some music?

[MadelynVictoria]

I feel self conscious constantly. I've been repressing my little side because of how self conscious I'm feeling. I can't be in little space by myself or with my daddy because of this.

[LittleBunnyCici]

I can definitely sympathize with feeling self-conscious about being a little.  There are a lot of different reasons why I'm still wrangling with that sense of shame.  A big part of it is that I had been without a Daddy of my own for many years, and during this time I was pretty exclusively the Caregiver for my own little.  I had a Daddy when I met her, but she got so used to me not having any other partners - and specifically, me not having my own dom - that she gets visibly uncomfortable when I talk about indulging in my own submissive side with other people.  It's an issue we've had a few conversations about, because we were recently both sharing a boyfriend who tried to set himself up as my Daddy and it always made her upset when I would mention anything DDlg related that he and I spoke about or did together.

 

For the most part, though, I try not to let those feelings get too much of a hold on me.  I remind myself about all the good things that being a little does for me and all the ways it helps make me feel better about a lot of the traumas and regrets that I've picked up over the years.  Getting into little space can definitely be a challenge, especially now that he walked out on us both and left me without a Daddy, but I'm lucky that I live somewhere that pot is supes easy to get a hold of because once a good buzz hits me I start regressing immediately and doing "activities" just helps me refine/direct the state.