Shady daddies

[Roseylittlee]

Hey littles!

 

How do you screen for fake/shady and narcissistic daddies??

 

I feeel like I’ve had a string of bad daddies lately and I just don’t know how to handle it.

 

So many liars out there. I’m just sick of getting hurt.

[Guest frozenwolf]

Heard you there I have had nothing but bad experiences with "mommies". The best way I can suggest is just go very slow and feel people out carefully.

Edited March 20, 2020 by frozenwolf

[RavenclawPrincess]

The biggest thing you can do is TAKE YOUR TIME before entering partnership. The more you get to know someone before rushing into a relationship, the better off you’ll be overall. Personally, I never enter a relationship without knowing someone decently well for months at a minimum. During the first couple of months and before entering partnership the person is going to be on their best behavior, and y’all are going to be in the “honeymoon phase” so to speak. Oftentimes true colors don’t emerge until after that period of time where everything seems perfect, so it’s smart to give things time to settle down so you can see the person and the situation with a stronger sense of reality.

 

I’m also going to add that shady caregivers aren’t the only problem. I’ve seen plenty of equally shady littles, so I would advise caregivers to be equally careful. Everyone needs to just slow down and give things more time. It’s a lot less painful to find out that someone isn’t who you thought they were BEFORE entering into partnership.

[Satan]

This is not just an issue with caregivers it's littles too, and it's not just a ddlg issues either. It's acrossed all forms of dating platforms.

 

My best advice would be don't take anything seriously till you met in person.

Taking it slow of course but I knew a caregiver for years, talked on Skype almost daily with video calls here and there. Exchanged phone numbers. Come to find out they had a fiance the whole time. I had no clue the whole time. Only found out cuz they told me they were splitting up and they were depressed.

People can be anyone they want online. They can hide anything. Follow your gut and don't let your feelings blind you from something fishy. don't put your heart out there too seriously till you met in person and see who they are behind the keyboard. (not trying to be a downer but that's just my personal advice from the experiences I have had)

[jaredstone363]

You're going to have shady people no matter what. I will say it seems the number of fake "daddys/littles" has skyrocketed compared to 10yrs ago. Just take it slow and listen to your gut. Look for red flags, like someone asking for pics right off the bat or someone calling you pet names in the first couple messages. Like others have said, take your time and take it slow, the "fakes" will reveal themselves eventually.

[SongofSparrow]

Like everyone else has been saying, take things slow and don't rush into things. I personally wouldn't go straight into looking for a relationship, and would start instead with looking for friendship. Another thing that I do when I first talking with someone is I see how they address me. If I start messaging with someone, and they immediately try to give me a pet name (i.e., calling me "little one" or "babygirl"), I call it out. If I have not given my consent, or agreed upon a nickname, I feel as though my opinion is already not being considered or respected.

[Guest Looby-Lou]

Unfortunately, some of the narcissistic or just plain nasty ones, are also very clever. So however careful you are, and even if you take things slow, you can't always avoid getting hurt.

But we can take precautions - the sort of advice given by the other people posting here

 

Someone being manipulative or lying is wrong. Plain wrong. Whether it's a CG/Daddy/Mummy or a little/sub/kitten whoever it is it's wrong. But someone wanting a different way of living DDlg is not necessarily fake. Just different. 

We do need to be careful using words like fake.

 

Something I do wish we could do, to help each other, is publicly call out the ones who lie, cheat or cruelly manipulate. Some sort of "star" rating on their personal ad or profile! Because I know full well whoever has done it to you, or to me, is going to move on to the next little (or Daddy) and do the same. I see it happening before my eyes on here and it frustrates the hell out of me that I can't do anything about it. But I also realise this isn't workable and that some of it's subjective and it's open to abuse. sigh

 

Wishing you happier experiences!

Looby

Edited March 20, 2020 by Looby-Lou

[MissPattch]

I keep every body in the "friend zone" for a long while. Narcissists and fakes get bored of all the small talk and move on pretty quick when they realise i'm not taking the bait, and the ones that stick around, well, they're usually the decent ones ^^ in my experience, anyways...

[princesshima]

If a daddy tries to be pushy even when I've said I'm uncomfortable with a thing, it's a giant red flag to me.