Age Dysphoria?

[Pupperoo]

This topic is probably more targeted for a bit older littles. I am 28 myself (next week anyway). I know most littles have an age they mostly identify with to which they regress while in little space. It's not necessarily what I am talking about here. I sometimes get this really heavy feeling of dysphoria when talking to or seeing younger people exploring life and being young. I spent most of my teenage years and most of my twenties in depression, so I missed out a lot. I just wish I could go back and redo it all, live my life. But I was wondering if this heavy feeling of age dysphoria might happen because I am used to age regressing in my little space. Does other littles in my situation and around my age (or up) feel the same? I'd love to hear some input on this!

[Guest PrincessSparkles35]

I can relate to what ur saying. I did not have an ideal childhood and made choices in my life out of survival and necessity. Sometimes I see others that seemingly have accomplished more than myself and are younger than me.

 

A friend gave me great advice that really helped me to put stuff in perspective. The advice was to focus on how far I've come in my life and what I've accomplished. Not to compare myself to another because I will always see myself as falling short. But if I look at my own progress I can see I've accomplished a lot.

 

There are things in my life I could redo too but it is not possible. We can only move forward, learn from where we've been and help others when we see them in a difficult situation. We've been in those situations and can help. That's how we redo things. We don't let others be hurt and stay hurt.

 

Hope this makes sense.

[Pupperoo]

It makes perfect sense! It's already how I do handle it, actually. Sometimes it simply hits hard, you know?   

Thank you for your input ♥

[Guest PrincessSparkles35]

It makes perfect sense! It's already how I do handle it, actually. Sometimes it simply hits hard, you know?   

Thank you for your input ♥

I know exactly what u mean. It does hit hard sometimes and that's when we need each other for support.

[LittleTeacup]

I don't really feel weird about my age as it relates to me, but I do feel weird when I see or know other people my age or younger doing "adult" things like getting married and having children and buying houses and stuff. I wanna be like "naw, you're not old enough for that yet!" but...they are. I'm literally the age my dad was when I was born and next year I'll be the age my mom was. But they always seemed so much older and responsible and put-together....

 

It's even weird at work knowing several people who've worked there for several years are a couple years younger than me. I just automatically assumed they're all in their 30s even though it turned out to be 25, 26, 27.

 

I think this will only get worse as I continue to age. I'll be all excited for my 70th birthday and others won't even want to be reminded of their birthdays. But I'll be talking to a 50 year old and think they're too young to be a doctor or something.

[Guest QueenJellybean]

this is a very rare feeling for me, but i'd be lying if i said i was immune to it.

i'm 29, and i've been noticing lately that every so often, i'll discover something cool,

& i'll have the passing thought 

"i'm envious of folks who get to discover this/get into this at a younger age -- they have much more time than i do!"

 

but really -- they don't!

i've got lots of time too, and so do you. 

[Cutiebunni]

Omg, I relate to this so much  

This is actually something I struggle with a lot. 
 

[Pupperoo]

Thank you all for your responses! Feels nice knowing I am not the only one that deals with this, to whatever degree it is Sadly it's not something we can do much about, but the feeling is there nonetheless. We can handle it just fine, I'm sure, with the support of each other ♥

[Guest Yali]

I’m only 25, soon 26, but I feel like I’m 16 or less. Everybody else seems so adult, and when I talk I often accidently think and say ”adults” when I mean my parents and grandparents but not myself, I think of myself as a kid. It’s always a shock to see people of my age having jobs/husband/wife/children... I just can’t realize that I’m an adult too. I simply don’t feel old enough. I have lived ages 11-25 in varying states of sickness and despair, I have probably missed the moment of becoming adult and now it’s impossible to grow up   

[Cutiebunni]

I’m only 25, soon 26, but I feel like I’m 16 or less. Everybody else seems so adult, and when I talk I often accidently think and say ”adults” when I mean my parents and grandparents but not myself, I think of myself as a kid. It’s always a shock to see people of my age having jobs/husband/wife/children... I just can’t realize that I’m an adult too. I simply don’t feel old enough. I have lived ages 11-25 in varying states of sickness and despair, I have probably missed the moment of becoming adult and now it’s impossible to grow up 

 

I am exactly the same!  I am also 25 and mentally I feel stuck at a much younger age. I spent my childhood and teen years in depression. I also feel dysphoric physically like with feeling too tall or big and too high up off the ground which makes me feel anxious. Idk if the makes sense lol. But anyway, thank you for sharing! I feel less alone 

[Guest Yali]

I am exactly the same!  I am also 25 and mentally I feel stuck at a much younger age. I spent my childhood and teen years in depression. I also feel dysphoric physically like with feeling too tall or big and too high up off the ground which makes me feel anxious. Idk if the makes sense lol. But anyway, thank you for sharing! I feel less alone 

 

Yay I’m not the only one! I often feel too tall and fat and being too high and strong too. I would like to be max a metre tall or something, and thin and weak and wobbly so I would feel more like a toddler. I really would like to be 1-3 years old or something. When I see real kids I think ”I wish I could be like he/she, as playful and happy and tiny and loved and being taken care of” etc. I just want to be a child again. I don’t want to grow up! I would like to be born again to my parents, maybe so that my little sister would be my big sister instead so I would feel even smaller. I’d have a second chance at life and I could really enjoy being little. And I would get a sickness that makes it so that I’ll never grow up past the age of three or so mentally or physically  

[Cutiebunni]

Yay I’m not the only one! I often feel too tall and fat and being too high and strong too. I would like to be max a metre tall or something, and thin and weak and wobbly so I would feel more like a toddler. I really would like to be 1-3 years old or something. When I see real kids I think ”I wish I could be like he/she, as playful and happy and tiny and loved and being taken care of” etc. I just want to be a child again. I don’t want to grow up! I would like to be born again to my parents, maybe so that my little sister would be my big sister instead so I would feel even smaller. I’d have a second chance at life and I could really enjoy being little. And I would get a sickness that makes it so that I’ll never grow up past the age of three or so mentally or physically

 

Yes I definitely understand!   I think being a little helps coping with these feelings, but sometimes it kinda makes the dysphoria worse because there’s a disconnect between mind and body lol

[Pupperoo]

I’m only 25, soon 26, but I feel like I’m 16 or less. Everybody else seems so adult, and when I talk I often accidently think and say ”adults” when I mean my parents and grandparents but not myself, I think of myself as a kid. It’s always a shock to see people of my age having jobs/husband/wife/children... I just can’t realize that I’m an adult too. I simply don’t feel old enough. I have lived ages 11-25 in varying states of sickness and despair, I have probably missed the moment of becoming adult and now it’s impossible to grow up 

 

It's interesting how very similar, yet seemingly different, the way we feel is. Like I said originally I feel like I've missed a big chunk of my life, much like you, and it's strange to see people around my age living their lives as adults. But in the end it kind of boils down to the fact that I don't feel ready to tackle the ''adult'' world yet, despite being 28; despite having lived away from my parents on my own for many years already. The idea of working and making money creates so much anxiety in me, and that is in big part because it's such a massive undertaking someone ''my age'' should never have to handle. 

 

Oh how I wish to just be a kid again so I don't have to worry. Well, you know, a child again with the ''knowledge'' I have today so I actually know not to worry xD

[sweetangelkitten]

I struggle with this as well. I am chronologically 24 and struggle with feeling 16, because I never had a childhood. Sometimes I feel like I am a 9 year old little girl. I live my life as a 16 year old in general, it's just how I am mentally, and then I regress even further to 9 years old as well. It's tough... I feel like I am weird and that others around me don't understand. I often fantasize about going back and living my life. I was in foster care and had to deal with muchb trauma. I even dream about being in high school again and going to prom... It's honestly heartbreaking for me, and I don't even know how to cope with this depression some days. 

[Pupperoo]

I struggle with this as well. I am chronologically 24 and struggle with feeling 16, because I never had a childhood. Sometimes I feel like I am a 9 year old little girl. I live my life as a 16 year old in general, it's just how I am mentally, and then I regress even further to 9 years old as well. It's tough... I feel like I am weird and that others around me don't understand. I often fantasize about going back and living my life. I was in foster care and had to deal with muchb trauma. I even dream about being in high school again and going to prom... It's honestly heartbreaking for me, and I don't even know how to cope with this depression some days. 

 

It's not weird. Not even in the slightest. Most people just don't have much capacity for empathy, so don't worry too much about what others thing. The important thing is that you find a way for yourself to cope, don't you think? ^^

[Sleepybabie]

I am Currently 25 years Old and seeing younger littles being all cute and skinny makes me wish i was like 19 or something. I hate being old. sometimes I question if my age makes me less cute and little. 

[LittleTeacup]

I am Currently 25 years Old and seeing younger littles being all cute and skinny makes me wish i was like 19 or something. I hate being old. sometimes I question if my age makes me less cute and little. 

 

25 isn't old! I'm 29 Your age doesn't make you any less cute and little... When I was 19 I was afraid of being myself and confused about a lot of things I understand better now - I wouldn't want to go back!

[Little kaiya]

I'm 41 and my Daddy thinks I'm cute and adorable, who am I to argue. Being little us a state of being, not a number that we can't control.

[sweetangelkitten]

The replies on this are so supportive <3 

[sweetangelkitten]

It's not weird. Not even in the slightest. Most people just don't have much capacity for empathy, so don't worry too much about what others thing. The important thing is that you find a way for yourself to cope, don't you think? ^^

 

Thank you <3 

[lucid_dreaming]

I am 31. I also lost many years through addiction and generally not being able to deal with my life. Now i outgrew a lot and I am handling life much better. On the one hand i struggle with aging, getting the first wrinkles etc... but on the other hand i am happier than ever before, because i finally got the skills i need to deal with things. It was necessary for me to become 27, 28... I have the feeling my life just begins. And i try not to think about the time i lost because life always happens NOW.

[lucid_dreaming]

but yeah on some days the woman in the mirror is a stranger. but i still feel way better than at the age of 18 so yeah...

I also came to this forum to find littles my age i can relate to.

Edited April 20, 2020 by lucid_dreaming

[Guest kitsy]

im 25, and i have felt exactly like that since i was a teenager. i think when you lose out on your childhood, be it from trauma or mental illness, it can really put a stopper on getting older. it kinda feels like my body is aging without me, and when im reminded of my actual age i have a breakdown. this year for my birthday, my friends and partner decided just to call it my 3rd birthday party! you're definitely not alone on this, and im really happy to see other people in this thread who share similar experiences ;v;

[Guest Fleur-Angelique]

I have felt something similar to this since I was about seven years old. In my case it's a combination of the fact that I'm autistic and the fact that some particular events occurred which prevented me from having a normal childhood and adolescence. I'm very aware of it, because it's the reason I do not celebrate my birthday, and so some degree do not celebrate my religions festival at Christmas time. Anything that's a year marker. It's not a coincidence that the ages I regress to in little space are the ages from the first 'occurrence' of my life and upwards. I do not regress to the ages before this where I did have a happy childhood. 

 

I've tried talking about this, I've touched upon it with my mother, and my former therapist but it doesn't help. It helps though for me to be in little space because to me, the time/days after I've left it is the only time I feel like my actual age and can embrace it. 

 

I'm so happy to see this topic before honestly I've felt super alone in it. It continues to be a very heavy influence on my life. My birthday is a few days from today and right now, like every year I've entered a state of depression. My family knows how to keep me happy on the day without mentioning what day it is but it's not the way I want things to be. Not at all. Thank you so much for talking about it.

[smallprincesssarah]

I can totally relate to it. I'm almost 27 and feel like I should be a teenager because I missed out on having a normal adolescence. When I see younger adults and teens, I get this dysphoric feeling that I'm not the right age, or that I wish I could go back. My birthday has always stressed me out, so my spouse refuses to put a number on whatever celebrations he surprises me with. It's in less than a week and I'm already fighting off anxiety attacks over it. I'm really glad this topic was made, because I've always felt so weird and isolated for having this experience.