Needing help in absence of my CG

[Guest lilmonkey7]

soon said in another post it's been above a month since I've last heard from my CG. Now please note she has been extremely devoted to our relationship, to the point of calling me at 11 pm when she gets off of work to read me a bedtime story and tell me goodnight. We originally we're together but she had to move with her family (she can't afford to live on her own) and it was fine until up to a month ago. She got really busy late to mid November, texted on a Friday saying how sorry she was, she had been busy and tired...then after that I haven't heard from her. I'm really concerned something may have happened but idk...I've been told things from maybe she's dead to I've been ghosted... Isk what to do, please help me.

[SmolAetherr]

the only thing you can do is find a distraction, take you mind off her and after a while you wont mind so much if she never comes back but its safe to assume you were ghosted sounds to me like she tried to fade out at least i believe if she did plan to go away she would have told you and there is free wifi literally everywhere if its really bad so its not like she couldnt get in touch

 

if a person wants to be in you life they will find a way and if they cant they will tell you

a person who doesent will ideally tell you or more commonly just not be there so they dont need to let you down and deal with the aftermath

[Guest lilmonkey7]

The thing is, she has been absent on everything, even social media Edited December 17, 2019 by lilmonkey7

[Guest Sunshinekitty]

That's concerning, but doesn't necessarily mean too much.

 

I don't know how far down the rabbit hole you've gone to look for her--but is it possible for you to contact her family if you can't get ahold of her through normal social media means?

[Guest lilmonkey7]

I'm not in best terms with her family...her side of the family, her dad for the most part, are very adamant in expressing their dislike for me, for reasons that are assuming I fir stereotypes (not going into details).

[Guest QueenJellybean]

this is a huge problem that i see a lot in this community.

this behavior is not okay. 

not just in this community or type of relationship, but in any. 

 

time for a meta talk.

if she doesn't want the relationship anymore, or got too busy -- sure, it fucking sucks, but that's life.

& it isn't fair to either of you for her to keep you both hanging on like this.

even if she feels guilty.

even if she doesn't mean to.

even if it's out of her control.

even if she still loves you.

even if she's absent everywhere.

even if, even if, even if.

 

send her a message, tell her you need to take, set a date. 

if she isn't there, cut your losses. 

find strength in yourself & your community or network of friends.

look for a babysitter, if that's your bag. 

research being a solo little.

build yourself back up.

remember you weren't the problem.

 

i know my advise might sound harsh, but i've been on both sides of this coin.

don't let yourself be that person. 

[Guest lilmonkey7]

That's the thing, I'm not the only one, she's MIA on everything, Facebook, Snap, Insta. Her friends have questioned me, I've questioned them. All of us haven't heard from her. Not a single sign of activity, nothing.

[Guest QueenJellybean]

That's the thing, I'm not the only one, she's MIA on everything, Facebook, Snap, Insta. Her friends have questioned me, I've questioned them. All of us haven't heard from her. Not a single sign of activity, nothing.

 

if you genuinely suspect that she's come to harm,

you need to contact her family members, 

or the people she lives with, or the police. 

 

full stop.

[Guest lilmonkey7]

True...I would but as I stated before hand, her parents have a disdain for me because I my color and do not tolerate me talking with them. But thank you for your advice!

[Guest QueenJellybean]

True...I would but as I stated before hand, her parents have a disdain for me because I my color and do not tolerate me talking with them. But thank you for your advice!

i didn't see that, i'm sorry -- that's absolutely awful.

 

however, 

if it's an emergency on that type of scale, i'd imagine they'd make an exception?

i can't tell you what to do, but i feel like you don't have many other options at this point.

i'm sorry you are in this position.

good luck!

[Guest lilmonkey7]

Again, thank you! I had a minor crying fit. I called her father, who proceeded to say that I am too white to date his daughter, and hung up...

[Guest lilmonkey7]

Got an update. New Snapchat profile. Positive it's her if you look that it's phone contacts.

[Guest lilmonkey7]

To everyone, I ask you delete this thread, delete everything about it and delete my account and. I have been hurt too many times and I know I can never find love with a mommy. For who was once an optimistic little boy just wanting someone to love me, I have become much to cynical and never have emotionally recovered to be in littlespace for this absence. I am declaring my little side dead, left to rot in the darkness and I am never going to look at cgl again. To me it only is pain and a pain that I cannot withstand

[Musalot]

I understand you are in pain, what the father did was really racist and cold-hearted, no one deserves to be treated in such a way. If you need time to heel take a break. Enjoy the outdoors, do something to get your mind off the hurt. But know that this community can be used for friends to talk too. I'll have you in my prayers tonight.