I found a “work dad” and he has unleashed a ddlg kink big time.

[krakenunleashed]

I’m 25 and I’ve been getting close with a 40 year old man at work and oh my god, he is...the natural, perfect embodiment of a daddy dom.

 

We started getting lunches together, now we text and hang out fairly frequently. He’s married and also devout, and has kids, so nothing will actually come of this kink-wise, but woof. We joke frequently about how our dynamic is like a dad and daughter, and I refer to him as dad frequently, mostly like “I need dad wisdom,” etc.

 

He strongly identifies with being a nurturer, and that he likes to help people reach their potential and show them what they can become. He also is stern and a natural disciplinarian, and emotionally adept too. He challenges me constantly, and I literally feel like I regress to being a child around him, which I’ve told him (he laughed). We’ve also talked about the concept of submission because I said I absolutely refuse to submit to anyone, never have wanted to, never plan to, etc. He was like, “Well, I see submission as a gift” which I hated at the time. And then I realized I literally want to submit to him. And I told him he is the only person I’ve ever met who I want to have authority over me, HA. He was honored, and thanked me.

 

We argue frequently and it feels like he’s trying to train / tame me, and I actually love it. When he told me he wants to help me, I got so angry and told him he’s condescending, and I started crying. He was like, “You can get mad, you can cry, I can take it. If you want my help, I’m here.” Ahhhggghfhfjfkdkkgkkddk.

 

I’ve never met anyone like him, definitely not anyone who makes me feel like this, and I honestly am totally infatuated. I used to think ddlg stuff was weird, but suddenly....i GET it. Big time (ha).

 

I wish he could be my daddy, like not even sexually, but I seriously wish we could dig into the dynamic more and make it more overt / explicit.

 

Has anyone else experienced this? Any advice? I’ve tried ddlg with my boyfriend since doing this and while it was really good in some ways, it’s just...not the same. Because I don’t really want the sex part so much as I want that type of discipline, wisdom from experience, and knowledge that he is giving me so much attention despite having 100000 drains on his time.

 

Also I probably need to not let myself be a mistress (I know he is having problems with his wife, eek). But fuck.

 

I just needed to get this out. Ugh.

[SmolAetherr]

well its a dang good thing you realise that a relationship or dynamic would be wrong, in the work enviroment and what with him being married and such, you should be careful about your emotions and thoughts you are just as responsible for being professional as he is

 

you can both stand to lose big time if this gets out of hand or noticed by a person who is not aware or tolerant of what is going on

Edited December 11, 2019 by Aetherr

[SadisticDaddy]

Who is to judge with this

what is right and what is wrong

 

We live in a society where it is considered being wrong to be a little girl

We live in a society where so much of what we need is considered wrong

 

- Of course it can all go wrong for you

so be careful

Emotions never ask for reasons

and with being careful

follow your heart

[Honeydadddy]

When I was about the same age, I had a similar relationship with a married 40yr old woman who “took me under her wing” (that’s what she called it). She was very successful and I think she saw potential in me. We had a very flirtatious relationship and there was lots of innuendo in our private conversations. I learned so much from her about business, and also about relationships. She was stern, direct, brutally honest, but also nurturing and supportive. I think she also, learned from our relationship, mostly about art and new music, but still I think she appreciated it. She was one of the more influential mentors in my life. At the time, I justified the relationship for myself because I didn’t work directly for her (she wasn’t technically my boss), and the fact that I don’t believe that a single relationship can meet all of a persons needs (because humans are not one thing, but many things at once). She’s still a friend of mine now though our relationship is different. Be safe. Be true to your own moral and ethical compass. Do what feels right to you. :-) Edited December 12, 2019 by Honeydadddy

[StrawberryTiddies]

Mind if I drop my possibly pointless wisdom?

 

I was in a situation much like this one and I gave into the "Mistress" role (judge if you wish, I've heard it all before)

The dynamic was a beautiful thing indeed but it can only go so far when he's living another life with someone he's already devoted his life to.

There's just no room for you.

I'm glad you realized that this would be totally wrong and hurtful.

My mistake ended with me being dropped like a hot potato when it came right down to it.

The wife, the kids will always win out (which is how its supposed to be )

I hope you don't get attached and become a giddy schoolgirl like I did but you seem a lot more confident and responsible so I'm sure you'll be fine.

Just wanted to say please think of yourself and your own mental state first.

[Guest ~*BabyDoll*~]

(I got permission from my friend to post her story) I have watched a very close friend of mine in this community go through something very similar. She was the mistress to a man who was married and had a son. While she loved all sides of what he was giving her (sexual and DDLG), she found herself craving his attention when he couldn’t give it to her because he was tending to his family.

 

She always told me to never fall into this situation because all in all, she’s just getting hurt(her words, but she’s doing it anyways). I say it like that because this man and her are still going at it after a whole year. She told me that he only messages her 3-4 times a week, sometimes if she’s lucky he will message her about 5-6 times in a week.

 

Just don’t make a decision that you will regret, don’t get attached, and don’t do anything that HE will regret. You seem to be aware of what you are doing, but take heavy caution. If you do take on the mistress role, prepare to always come second. But even if you don’t, even if you are texting him, take cautions with your words to him. If his wife sees them and she doesn’t like what she sees, it could ruin his relationship big time.

 

Otherwise, you are an adult, you seem to know what you are doing. I am glad that you are able to experience this side of our community and understand it though! I wish you the best of luck with this! xxx

[Guest Ninny689]

It’s not really even about you - you’re intruding on someone else’s territory, hun - married people are off limits no matter what problems they’re experiencing - what you’re doing is emotional cheating - even if you haven’t had anything physical happen and don’t intend to, it’s a huge slight to the person he’s with - be respectful - that’s someone else’s person, not yours - he may or may not realize the sexual tension - but, you do - so, you should be the bigger person.. no matter how “little” you are