Telling my boyfriend

[Guest lilkitten95]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year now. And he knows some of the things I am into. But he doesn’t know about me being little. Or anything else. He has never explored anything further than your typical vanilla relationship. I guess I’m just wondering how should I go about telling him and explaining?

 

 

I should mention he is willing to learn and hear me out. I just have never introduced anyone to this before. Everyone I have met or told has been aware and knowledgeable

Edited November 26, 2019 by lilkitten95

[SmolAetherr]

in all honestly i feel like you dug a deep hole here, ideally stuff like that should be discussed at the start, to gauge compatibility and such

 

he may feel betrayed by things like that being kept secret and i cant say i would blame him, but if not you probably should take it slow and be honest..

show him what it means to you and ask him how he would feel being involved

[Guest lilkitten95]

in all honestly i feel like you dug a deep hole here, ideally stuff like that should be discussed at the start, to gauge compatibility and such

 

he may feel betrayed by things like that being kept secret and i cant say i would blame him, but if not you probably should take it slow and be honest..

show him what it means to you and ask him how he would feel being involved

 

He is willing to learn. And such. I knew I was missing something in the initial post.

[Guest QueenJellybean]

hiya!

there are a lot of really great starting points on this site for easing him in.

be honest, and open. 

expect to answer a lot of questions.

have him make an account, if he's willing.

check out some of our resources together.

[Guest Looby-Lou]

I found your post a bit confusing, so my answer might not be relevant. But I'll tell you about an experience I had in case it helps.

 

I had a relationship which started off strictly vanilla. At the time I didn't know about DDlg myself. (I'd always been little without knowing what it was.) So my boyfriend already knew how I behaved and was comfortable with it.

 

Then I heard about DDlg, learned more about myself, and after about 3 months I took a deep breath and told my bf about it. I was shaking with nervousness that he'd just get up and walk away.

He surprised me with how open minded he was. At that point I let him lead the conversation. Let him ask questions as they came into his mind, and answered them as best I could. He was very willing to listen & discuss, and he was attracted to a lot of it. It was a very positive experience for both of us.

 

Over the next 6 months or so we explored some DDlg & D/s activities together such as him choosing food for me in a restaurant, feeding me, some sexual stuff, giving me directions, clothing, etc. He was never actually my Daddy, we just added some of these things into our existing relationship.

 

The relationship ended because we just weren't on the same path in life, nothing to do with DDlg or kink.

 

I can't imagine being with someone for a year and not telling them anything, and also now that i know i'm little i really can't imagine not telling someone almost straight away. I'm not saying you're wrong, but it might disturb him that you've been together so long and not said anything. 

 

Good luck and wishing you both happiness

 

Looby

[redheadprincess98]

Edited November 26, 2019 by redheadprincess98

[Lovingukdaddy]

Well it's perfectly understandable that you've kind of hidden this side of you from him as it can be daunting to tell people. Especially as some people don't know about it and may panic. The good thing is he willing to learn.

 

I say all of this with experience. I've helped people through this on here and professionally so if you'd like to talk then I'm happy to share my experience.

[Guest lilkitten95]

So I wanted to give a quick update. We talked last night. And he is completely fine with learning. He’s been exploring this forum and fetlife. And wants to really try being a daddy. And a dom. He doesn’t want to rush into it as he wants to learn as much as he can but this far He’s very open minded. And it makes me so excited.

As for me hiding it. I never truly hid it. My whole room is full of my stuffies, blankies, coloring stuff and a bunch of other things. He’d come home to me coloring or snuggling with my stuffies or watching my favorite shows that make me feel little. He just always assumed it was a quirk of mine.

Edited November 26, 2019 by lilkitten95

[Guest Looby-Lou]

It's really nice that you've given an update. (And explained the original situation too.) And it's great that he's so interested, but also being sensible and not rushing.

 

Wishing both of you lots of happiness together

 

Looby