Daddy's ALWAYS busy

[korilakkuma]

Hewo...well umm idk I should be doing this but... Daddy's always busy. With work and his life and stuff. We're ldr and have 2 hours time difference. Distance isn't really an issue. But his constant busyness kinda bothers me

He disappears for hours and always says he's just busy. And he's often falling asleep without Nini now...

Daddy doesn't think he's not always busy but we only have small talk nowadays. Our conversations would be us asking how our days have been, me telling stuff about my day. Wether he's working or not, he's always busy.

Im getting to the point where I'm getting tired of the situation.

I feel like I'm always on the sideline just waiting to get any bit of attention he can give me.

I don't feel like I'm a part of his life. Just an online thing he'll text when he's got free time. I don't feel like he makes time to talk to me.

 

We've talked about his whole busyness lots of times. After we've talked about it, he'll pay more attention for a bit and then go back to disappearing for hours, leaving me on seen...

 

I'm just... Sad. I feel lonely and neglected. I feel like Daddy doesn't like me anymore.

 

 

Okay, rant over. Hopefully this makes me feel better

Edited October 2, 2019 by lil.prinsesa

[Metalheaddaddy]

I feel like you found the answer on your own.

 

Im getting to the point where I'm getting tired of the situation.

 

 

There's going to be a lot of people that are going to come in and say "Tell your daddy how you feel. That'll fix everything": but you clearly have. Multiple times. When it gets to that point you have 2, maybe 3 options depending on how you swing.

 

option 1)

NSFW

 

Option 2) accept that this is your relationship now and try to find happiness in that.

 

3) Open the relationship.

 

 

To offer a contrast I work 12 hour shifts 7pm to 7am my time. My little usually works 4am my time to 1my time. when I get home she's working, when she gets home I'm having to get ready for work.

 

So I have her wake me up on her break so we can talk. It's only half hour but we talk. Then she wakes me up again when she gets home. I remind her to take her afternoon meds and then I start getting ready while on the phone with her. I'll even just leave her on speaker while I'm showering.

 

I stay with her til I pull into my jobs parking lot.

 

If it's slow enough at work I'll text her till she sleeps, if not I'll wish her good night super early.. She'll text me 4am my time to say good morning. I'll text her good morning back and remind her to take her morning mends. we'll text untill she starts her shift. Then i go home, fall asleep and the cycle starts all over again.

 

Now it doesn't always work like this. Sometimes she has to work a double, sometimes I'm so tired I'll just sleep though the phone ringing. Hell I've even answered it half asleep, mumbled something and passed right out snoring in her ear.

 

But the point is we both make time for each other. I still go out with friends, she just spent the weekend at her brothers but in the end we still make each other a priority.

[Guest Littledreamer95]

Hewo...well umm idk I should be doing this but... Daddy's always busy. With work and his life and stuff. We're ldr and have 2 hours time difference. Distance isn't really an issue. But his constant busyness kinda bothers me

He disappears for hours and always says he's just busy. And he's often falling asleep without Nini now...

Daddy doesn't think he's not always busy but we only have small talk nowadays. Our conversations would be us asking how our days have been, me telling stuff about my day. Wether he's working or not, he's always busy.

Im getting to the point where I'm getting tired of the situation.

I feel like I'm always on the sideline just waiting to get any bit of attention he can give me.

I don't feel like I'm a part of his life. Just an online thing he'll text when he's got free time. I don't feel like he makes time to talk to me.

 

We've talked about his whole busyness lots of times. After we've talked about it, he'll pay more attention for a bit and then go back to disappearing for hours, leaving me on seen...

 

I'm just... Sad. I feel lonely and neglected. I feel like Daddy doesn't like me anymore.

 

 

Okay, rant over. Hopefully this makes me feel better

Be honest with him and tell him this. Tell him you're not happy and you have needs too.

A relationship is about two being happy, not just him. Remember that.

[korilakkuma]

Thank you guys for responding

I really love my Daddy but to be completely honest the thought of breaking up crossed my mind before(I'm sorry Daddy) but I love him so I choose to stay. Cause I keep thinking that love is a choice and that we're not always always like this. We still have some good moments.

I'm hoping that we can still get through this. Maybe soon Daddy won't be as busy and will make time for me.

 

I think I was just exhausted and wanted to rant. I no wanna leave Daddy.

 

Again, thank you for all the advice ❤

[korilakkuma]

I'm keeping myself busy and spending time away from my phone a bit so I won't notice his busyness as much ☺

I want to give this relationship my all so I'm trying anything that can help hehe

Edited October 3, 2019 by lil.prinsesa

[neko]

You say you're giving this relationship your all, but is your daddy giving your relationship his all? From what you've mentioned it really doesn't sound like he is giving this relationship any energy. Like it's just sitting in the back of his mind and when he's bored he remembers "oh yeah i have a girlfriend i should talk to"

 

I know breaking up sucks and it's a really painful thing to go through but you really should be focusing on your own feelings. You shouldn't be in a relationship where you constantly have to ask yourself "when will my daddy text me today? will he even text me?" and similar questions. You are the most important person in this situation. How you feel and how you are being treated are 100% the top priority in any relationship. Don't stay with somebody just because you're scared of hurting them.

 

It seems like it's not going to be long until he either breaks up with you or just ghosts you completely.

[korilakkuma]

[lacey bunny]

My Daddy and I are a LDR AND he's always busy too... on top of that super forgetful!!

Although, he keeps me involved by letting me know his schedule and I like to help out by reminding him of things he has to do. We have a date night once a week where we both take a night or a few hours of that day to spend together. He gives me stuff to do when knows his day or weekend is going to be really full. Things like cleaning, journal entries, drawing, letter writing, eating/drinking properly, crafting, reading, shows/movies to watch, painting my nails, etc. or I'll ask him to pick my jammies, clothes, and nail polish colour to involve him that way too. He'll set aside special time for me to be able to share all that stuff with him too.

We also send pictures to one another. One my favourite things is picking 5-10 things to take pictures of (kinda like a scavenger hunt) or just pick a number for random silly weird pictures to send one another with no context. He'll write a story format of things he does when he's away for longer than a weekend and includes pictures if he can. Sometimes he forgets to do those things and I just laugh because that's just like him to forget... He is so silly!

I send text to remind him, to get water, take pictures, to take time for himself, to eat a snack, stretch etc. because I loooooove taking care of him too. It's my way of being involved.

 

I know how rough it can be having a busy Daddy (and long distance at that) and sometimes feeling like you're in last place when it come everything else. When I feel those moments I try to remind myself that he's doing his best to manage everything and sometimes its easier to ask me to wait either because out everyone I know how difficult it is for him to find that time (even for himself) or because he's getting it all done first so he can make sure he gives me his full attention he wants to give me when he is able to.

 

You can talk to your Daddy to come with or compromise things to make it work. If you're still not happy than you have the option to find happiness without them.
But, lil.prinsesa, it sounds like you really love and care for your Daddy and just need to vent (which I COMPLETELY understand) so I really hope you two can find something that works for you both when he gets busy.   

[korilakkuma]

Thank you for this Lacey bunny ☺☺

I missed the days when Daddy would give me tasks or just baby me tbh

 

I always tell him random stuff that happened during my day and I've asked him before to tell me more about his day too (he usually just says good or busy)

I know he loves me and cares for me and he has lots of things to do. But I just want more from him. I wish I could help him with his stuff so he won't be as busy and we can spend more time together.

But for now, I can only just wait things out (He just got a new job so he's busier than his usual busy self)

 

I'll talk to him some more about giving me tasks again ☺

Your picture game sounds fun btw ☺☺

[lacey bunny]

You are more than welcome, lil.prinsesa! If you ever need to vent or just want to talk feel free to DM me. Hopefully you two can get back in sync soon and congrats to him on the new job hope that's treating him well.

 

Have you asked him what you can do to help out?

With my Daddy it's taking initiative with certain things or/and letting him know before he leaves I want a task list. I even wrote out a bunch of things I can do without him so he can pick from there if he cannot think of anything. Also giving him time to himself is something that helps him a lot.

 

Do you write your Daddy letters when you miss him? Or use a shared calendar for tasks and appointments that might help with the task giving and set up an reward system with time spent together as a reward.

 

You should see if your Daddy is willing to play the picture game with you!!

Here is an easy start list:

• A smile
• Something that is your favourite colour
• A cricle
• A drink
• Something you find beautiful

Edited October 5, 2019 by lacey bunny