When you're new

[Vaar'ika]

So I'm new here and to the community. A little and I are thinking about being in a relationship but don't quite know yet. I've never had a little and she's never had a daddy. And she's not *My* little rn, we're just kind of testing if it would work. So, IDK, I'm new. What are some signs that we're on the right path and what are some signs I should look out for that mean things aren't working?

[Little kaiya]

It's a relationship and like any relationship the same red flags or warning signs apply.

 

Is there solid, honest and open communication? Is there mutual respect and trust? Do you communicate not just about good things but issues that crop up as well? Are you both setting boundaries that make sense and respect one another? Are you both looking out for what's in the best interest of both of you versus one of you? Are you discussing hard and soft limits? Etc, etc.

 

Perhaps one of the most important things is are you both taking the time to really get to know one another and determine if you're compatible or are you just jumping in hoping it works? DDlg is not a race, take the time to build a proper, solid foundation.

 

Little kaiya

[Guest Looby-Lou]

Like little Kaiya said, a lot of the usual relationship situations apply here too.

 

Plus DDlg can bring out extra vulnerabilities and questions, even questions about who you really are. Sometimes people think they need to try and be a certain kind of Daddy or certain kind of little.  Maybe that's partly what you're asking?

If so, I'd recommend you both just be yourselves and see if you click!

 

If something doesn't feel comfortable for one of you, then discuss it. But it does NOT mean that one of you is "the wrong kind of Daddy" or "not a good enough little". Neither one of you should try to behave in a way that doesn't feel okay to you.

 

You'll either be compatible or not. Trying to be someone you're not won't help with that, it will just confuse the situation.

 

Keep talking openly to each other, and most of all just try to relax and enjoy each other's company. Let things happen naturally. 

 

I wish you both all the best

 

Looby