Daddy making things worse

[Fragile Princess]

Hello...

So my Daddy and I just moved to a new flat, having most of things still unpacked and had a friend help us moving.

He accidentally found my pacifier, and he started laughing asking why do I have it.

My Daddy's reaction...? Instead of explaining it anyhow, he started laughing with him together, making jokes about me probably using it all home alone, saying "lol maybe you have daddy kink? You should have told me!"

I feel... so upset. He told me later on, taht he started pretending because it would "easier to explain just by me to them both".

Not only he didn't support me, he even made it worse... I felt very unsecure because of it.

I explained it to my friend later and he was pretty chill about it, but what do I do about my Daddy...? He didn't even want to apologize for it, he only said it was my fault I didn't hide it well enough...

 

[MrDaddydarnit]

Yeah. he should apologize. if I was in that situation I wouldn't have known what to do either. and I would have mad a similar choice. But more of a sexual teasing humiliation thing. But if it had gotten you upset apologizing and explaining how he panicked would be the proper thing to do.  

[popcornbaby]

Yeah i understand he panicked and felt awkward, but he should never blame it on you. He needs to be confronted, lay out how you feel sternly and dont beg for an apology. If he doesnt apologise by himself, he is too immature to handle the dynamic, he should never be embarassed of it and then go ahead and act like he did nothing wrong.

[Wish]

This is a very frustrating thing to hear about, and I can only imagine how uncomfortable it was to experience.    I sort of feel like it's your Daddy's job to protect you from this sort of ridicule, not contribute to it (negotiated kink context aside, of course). Plus it's a bit worrying that he's so uncomfortable with his kink that he'd try to disassociate himself from it to the point of throwing you under the bus. "Easier" is no excuse, and, in my opinion, he owes you an apology.

[MysticSand]

I think the first thing you need to realize is that his reaction was from his own insecurities. Yes, he was in the wrong in the way he reacted, but also it very much sounds like it was a defense mechanism for him rather than him reacting maliciously. I would advise to have a talk to him, and frame it so that he knows it's serious and not just you voicing a small frustration. It was humiliating and hurtful, and he should apologize for the way he acted. Then, maybe talk about how he could have went about it and about his own insecurities in being a Daddy.

 

Also plan ahead in case something similar in the future happens again!

[0Naughtys Kitten0]

That wasn't cool!

 

You are in this together!  As your DD, he should be protecting you as mentioned before...

 

Though he was embarrassed, he should have had the presence of mind to see that it would be equally (if not more so) embarrassing for you! That was definitely his time to shine as a DD and not tell you to hid your things better... I am sorry you had to go through that!

[XSnowXWhiteX]

Oooh thats awkward! Personally I agree with above comments; it was his own insecurities that got in the way of him protecting you. So it's a good opportunity to both have a chat about things like this in future and how better to deal with them.

However, I would make it clear to him you are hurt by his comments and to be honest I'd get a little mad (I don't me tantrum and whine). I mean tell him how it is adult to adult. Sometimes we all need a bit of a kick up the butt and he sounds like he deserved it. If he apologizes then drop it and move on, if he doesn't well you need to think if he cares more about his own image then you and your shared dynamic.Hope it goes well.

[SnugglyMunchlax]

I agree with all the comments so far. That is a pretty messed up thing he did especially later where he did not even apologize to you and blamed you instead. Definitely talk to him and explain how what happened and how he reacted made you feel. If he does not apologize or refuses to make it up to you, you may want to think things through and if your daddy is really treasuring you like he should. In my opinion, a Daddy should always have his little's back no matter what. I hope that this eventually ends on a positive note and everything works out though!

[Purinsesu]

Oh no that sounds really horrible! I'm so sorry to hear you had to go through that. It's obvious your Daddy didn't really know how to handle the situation as it was so suddenly. When situations come out of nowhere and we are not ready for them, it's sometimes hard to know how to react, but he had no reason to react the way he did. He is supposed to protect you, not ridicule you! I can only imagine how you must feel. If it was me, that would have put a huge dent in my trust towards him, and we all know how important trust is in this dynamic. I understand he must have been panicking in the moment, but he didn't even want to apologize for it later on and still blamed you. That's so messed up!

 

I have often thought about how to react if one of my little things got found by a friend or anyone really, and in truth I'm still not sure how that would be. CG's are supposed to protect us through everything, especially situations like this.

Even your friend reacted better than your Daddy did afterwards and that's just horrible.

 

I would sit down with him and have a serious conversation about it. Make him clear how important it is. He needs to apologize! Even if he does apologize, the dent in the trust you build will still be there and take a long time to completely heal. He needs to be made aware about how serious what he did really is, and hopefully he will learn from it and not make the same mistake again and be there for his little next time the way a good Daddy should.

[Fragile Princess]

I tried talking, but we had another fight so I wanted to text him what I wanted to say instead. It went... REALLY awful. He said really mean things and finished with "You are making me look like a monster, then why the hell are you still with me? Find someone else if you want."

He apologized after that for the text, but not for the whole situation... I don't know what to think about it...

It just hurts so much.

 

Because of that I even started thinking... maybe he just hates being Daddy? Maybe he just wants to be just boyfriend..? Or maybe not even boyfriend... am I the one that should quit being a little..? Am I the problem?

Edited September 5, 2019 by Fragile Princess

[Little kaiya]

Honestly, it sounds like he isn't interested or mature enough for a DDlg relationship. Don't change who you are but you may need to realize you may not find what you want with him.

 

Little kaiya

Edited September 6, 2019 by Little kaiya

[Purinsesu]

That is just horrible, I am so sooo sorry to hear you have to go through that...

Please don't ever go changing yourself. Being little is part of your identity and not something you can just change, you can only try to repress it. I came out of a 3 year long relationship where I repressed being little all that time because I knew they hated it. It made me super miserable. I tried being little on my own with solo activities, but ended up just feeling more miserable since I was living pretend in my relationship.

Eventually I ended up telling them, and shortly after that I got dumped. I wasted 3 years of my life like that, and never would I do that again.

 

Don't be like that. Your little you is wonderful and don't go changing it for anyone, especially someone like him. I am sorry to say but your Daddy doesn't really sound like being a Daddy is for him, and that fault is entirely his, not yours! I know you love him more than anything, but you really need to start prioritizing yourself dear... You have done all you could. You have tried talking to him multiple times to make clear how important it is to you, and all he does is be angry and make you feel even more miserable. That's just horrible. 

Edited September 6, 2019 by Purinsesu