Catfishes - opinion and experiences?

[Guest Voidart]

I have gotten catfished a handful amount of times, i believe it's around 5-6 times in total. Latest one was as recent as today. 
It really discourages you to keep searching. In fact, it keeps you on your toes. 

I don't know, but by my experience i might actually be leaving in the near future to move forward, away from problems. 
Now i'm not saying that anything is problem free, and i'm also fully aware of the consequences on meeting people online. And it is through that experience alone that i'm basing a decision from a rather unpleasant experience. 

Anyhow. Have you been ever been catfished before?
Feel free to discuss and share your thoughts or experience on the matter. 
 

 

~Me

[Guest Niet meer]

Catfishing is a common problem with online dating, especially in BDSM and DDLG focussed dating. People forget the pain they can inflict with this kind of fraud. It makes you lose trust in online dating for sure!

[Guest brattynsweet]

How do you know you're being catfished? I'm lucky that's never happened to me before.

[Guest Voidart]

Well in truth, you never really know. That's why it's usually a catfish. A normal human being who 'wants' to establish a connection with someone else won't have any quarrels with identifying yourself as yourself. 
Pictures for verification, voice/video chatting and avoiding any other social forms that would prove yourself of being who you are. 

Suddenly finding excuses and getting cold feet for something so basic.

 

Now i'm not one to entail that 'social anxiety' and other fears alike doesn't exist and what not.
However, please expect and assume that there was a decent exchange of dialogue between the two people before anything else.
(this i say in order to avoid any further misconceptions to what could otherwise and naturally be)

Thanks!

 

All i'm saying is that there are some very obvious signs to this form of behavior, but they usually show up when more confronted.

 

And for those of you who wonder, well maybe they just didn't like you. And that's fair. 
But you're quite the person if you take the initiative to: 
First get in contact with someone, getting to know a person on a personal level and then when asked for a simple voice call. Having bail out on you and remove you without any said messages, is quite fishy. 
(hehe get it.)

Well, that's my take on it in any case. Hope this answered some questions.

[Guest brattynsweet]

Well in truth, you never really know. That's why it's usually a catfish. A normal human being who 'wants' to establish a connection with someone else won't have any quarrels with identifying yourself as yourself. 

Pictures for verification, voice/video chatting and avoiding any other social forms that would prove yourself of being who you are. 

Suddenly finding excuses and getting cold feet for something so basic.

 

Now i'm not one to entail that 'social anxiety' and other fears alike doesn't exist and what not.

However, please expect and assume that there was a decent exchange of dialogue between the two people before anything else.

(this i say in order to avoid any further misconceptions to what could otherwise and naturally be)

Thanks!

 

All i'm saying is that there are some very obvious signs to this form of behavior, but they usually show up when more confronted.

 

And for those of you who wonder, well maybe they just didn't like you. And that's fair. 

But you're quite the person if you take the initiative to: 

First get in contact with someone, getting to know a person on a personal level and then when asked for a simple voice call. Having bail out on you and remove you without any said messages, is quite fishy. 

(hehe get it.)

 

Well, that's my take on it in any case. Hope this answered some questions.

 

Thank you. That makes a lot of sense. I'll have to investigate further. When I get back into the dating game, I don't want to get catfished. I'm really sorry it happened to you quite a few times already.

Edited August 1, 2019 by brattynsweet

[Guest Voidart]

Thank you. That makes a lot of sense. I'll have to investigate further. When I get back into the dating game, I don't want to get catfished. I'm really sorry it happened to you quite a few times already.

 

I was trying to word myself as best i could!

 

The thing about being catfished.. it'll hurt until you've gone through it a couple of times. At that point you just go through this phase of instant pasive attitude with 0 hurt included. 

It's more of a: "Welp, this ain't working." kind of attitude. Because getting a date online sucks in general. It's much harder. And that's when you give up hope. 

But idk, we all work differently so i hate to speak for everyone on the matter. 

 

Don't be sorry. Unless you were the one who did it! Which in that case.. *brings forth a paddle* 

No but seriously. It's like any kind of hurt, we move on, we grow, we groove, and be done with it in no time. Ranting always help though. At least in my book. 

Maybe i'm overthinking this and i hate repeating mysel but.. i wouldn't want to speak for everyone else on this matter!

[MysticSand]

How do you know you're being catfished? I'm lucky that's never happened to me before.

There's a post by the Admins on signs of a catfish somewhere around I believe.

 

Personally, I think a lot is just intuition and common sense? If something doesn't feel right to you or seems a bit 'off', then chances are something is indeed not as they seem.