A little's heart

[Little_Butterfly]

Hi I don't really have a question. I just wrote something recently and I now feel the need to share it to feel better.

 

 

My heart opens, but the traffic just rushes past. It stirs up the air, sending a wisp of hope. But no, there are better places to be. Nobody wants to stop by here. Not for long.

“Look at this heart. Yes, it seems very functional, very welcoming. But, no, it’s got too many imperfections, too many cracks. It’s nice to look at, to touch, but not for me”

So my heart closes. It tries to heal. It rests. But it is never the same again. Every visitor leaves footprints that will never go away. Some say goodbye, some just wander out like it was a quick trip into a convenience store. Come in, grab what you want, rush out. Save your real shopping for the fancy stores. The bright, shiny new ones. The ones with perfect décor with perfect goods. Yes, they might not be really the best match for you but they have what you dream about.

And then my heart starts to open again. Renovated. Cracks covered up with layer upon layer of tears frozen hard. Pretty new signage that hides the depth. And everyone is curious about this old heart made new again. They still come and go. They come seeking something, but what they take you find cast aside on the side of the road soon after.

Every so often, the perfect one comes in. They have found the perfect thing in my heart. They take it, they shape it, they hold it. My heart opens more. This has become more than the convenience store, more than the shiny new boutique. This is home.

And so my heart is claimed.

But then, they decide that this isn’t the heart they wanted. They don’t want the cracks. They can’t care for a heart as full as mine. Maybe they weren’t supposed to have a heart like mine. Maybe they already have too many other hearts. Maybe they don't really want a heart after all. Maybe they found one prettier, younger, slimmer, closer, cuter.

So they too cast my heart aside. But not just on the side of the road. They throw it off a bridge. Who knows why. Did my heart harm them? That cannot be. It is the heart of a little. A heart that knows nothing but love.

When my heart is cast aside like this, all the cracks explode. Every. Single. Hurt. The people who harmed it over the many years, even when it was just a young child heart. The cracks explode so wide that pieces of my heart fall away. They are gone. My heart has to somehow keep going with less and less of its love, its compassion, its sweetness and its strength.

One day there will be none left. My heart will close shop. There will be no visitors, no borrowers, no owners. It will sit safely in a corner until the pain stops it will be no more.

Edited July 9, 2019 by Little_Butterfly_now_moth

[DragonAllFather]

This is sad, but so beautifully written that I can't just read the words, but feel them. It is said that people come and go, and this is so painfully true that the ones who desire for someone to stay, to understand everything they have, to connect like a complicated puzzle piece, suffer. But you already have the strenght, so I'm sure you can endure the hard road until you find the one who is made for you, the one that will stay forever and take care of such a wonderful heart.

[Little_Butterfly]

Thank you DragonAllFather. It does seem that the best creations come from pure emotions.