I can't help but being dependent

[Guest little angel kitten]

Thank you in advance for wasting your time reading this. 

So, the thing is:

My caregiver (aka my daddy :3) recently found a job and he is really busy now as he is working from 8am to 6:30pm. That's kinda okay since I'm still attending my classes at university and I'm also busy studying and I can distract myself, but guess what: Summer break starts in a week. That means I'll be all alone -i have no friends- and bored for three months or so. I talked about this with my daddy last weekend and he told me to be less dependant on him, but I don't know how to do it. He's been my everything for so long I can't figure out any way I can distract myself besides talking and spending time with him.   

Also, I know a girl my age that's into everything I like (not DDlg or petplay tho, just my personal likes such as kawaii fashion, otaku world and so on) but I really never socialized before so I find it really hard to tell her we should hang out sometime this summer so we can build our friendship and I could spend time with her and her friends and learn to be with someone who's not my daddy.     

Any advice? :3       

[CryBabyUniWolf]

Remember that you're still an adult.

Your daddy is doing adult things.

Don't make him feel bad for doing what he needs to do.

You are an adult and can take care of and do things for yourself.

 

If you really feel like you need someone maybe talk to him about getting a babysitter?

[daddysmaeuschen]

I have kind of the same problem, I get really depressed during summer or spring break because of this... so last spring break I decided to look for a job for this summer break and it turns out I also have to do an internship for university so now I'm doing that instead! A job or an internship can also be an opportunity to make friends Also, moneyyy

[baby_k]

I would dedicate the summer time for selfdiscovery: what you want from life, what plans and goals you have, what is happy life for you, what things you like and what not ( from hobbies, to food and so on ), how you want to spend your days, what makes you think your day/life/actions were successful...? As clearly you are not 100% happy that time, so what you need to change that?

[LittleTeacup]

but I really never socialized before so I find it really hard to tell her we should hang out sometime this summer so we can build our friendship and I could spend time with her and her friends and learn to be with someone who's not my daddy.     

Any advice? :3       

 

Honestly you could just say "hey we have a lot in common do you want to hangout?" Or if you're up for it, the more bold "hey I want to hang out more with you".

 

I'm not the best at socializing either, but if there is somebody I want to spend more time with, it's easiest to just say so flat out. No room for confusion. Do you have her phone number? If not, ask for it! It's not weird.

 

You could even tell her you haven't had friends in a long time and to please understand if you don't know what you're doing. I'm sure she'd be glad to help you out.

[Maeve]

What if you made it your mission this summer to really discover what you like and new hobbies to get into? Try cooking new things, gaming, gardening, getting into sports or working out, reading, movie/tv show marathons, arts and crafts and all sorts of stuff. Heck, you could even create a sort of "summer camp" program for yourself: on Mondays you focus on artistic activities, Tuesdays are for cooking and baking, Wednesday is laundry day and a free day, Thursday is a sports day, and Friday is another free flow day or whatever (maybe see if your potential new friend is available to hang some Fridays). Look at your summer break as an opportunity to grow and have fun, instead of as an aimless void where you kill time until you can be with your caregiver.

 

As for hanging out with a new friend, I'd get her contact info if you haven't already. "I'd love to hangout with you some this summer! Maybe we could do [insert activity you think you'd both like here] in the next couple of weeks or something? Here's my number/social media info/way to contact me." Then just go from there and be yourself. If the two of you don't click as friends, that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with either of you. It just means the two of you didn't quite click personality-wise (and that's okay) - minestrone soup and smothered bean burritos are great, but I wouldn't really want them mixed together lol.

 

No matter what you wind up doing, I hope you have an awesome summer!

 

Edit to add friend stuff.

Edited June 6, 2019 by Maeve